Wow.

If you say "Strasburg's debut wasn't that impressive, it was against the Pirates," you're a hater and/or you weren't watching because that guy was pure filth. The Pirates do suck and maybe a better team would have been able to work a walk or two off of him, but he was amazing.

nyyfans.com is hysterical

I'm pretty sure they blame every bad thing that ever happened to the Yankees on Dave Eiland. They sound like children because their hatred of him is so pure, complete, and irrational.

feminism means

tut-tutting over guys saying girls are hot or not when your entire blog objectifies dudes and then attacking girls for saying celebrities you personally like because you think they're cool are ugly, or something

I hope Joel Sherman feels bad

Suck it, Joel. Suck. It.

Jon Heyman is just bad

a new article

So here are his "surprise teams" to watch:
Tampa Bay Rays
Colorado Rockies
Minnesota Twins
Atlanta Braves
Arizona Diamondbacks
Cincinnati Reds
Cleveland Indians

His reasoning is mostly a lot of bullshit based on Spring Training stats, especially his jizzing all over the Rays (who are a very good team, don't get me wrong, but calm down Jon). But seriously, the Rockies and Twins made the playoffs last year. How would those teams "surprise" you in 2010? The Rays were in the World Series two years ago and had a rough year in a really awesome division last year, and still finished above .500. The Braves were... I want to say 86-76? and made a serious push at the Wild Card and division toward the end of the season. I'll give him the final three, even if they're just generally based on him blabbing on about ST. The Indians' top three starters are Jake Westbrook, Fausto Carmona, and Justin Masterson. ST don't mean shit, to quote LaTroy Hawkins; that's a bad rotation.

Also, I seriously want to fucking punch him in the face for going on about "a scout says... a NL executive said..." I really hate that shit. It says nothing. For one thing, we don't know if a scout actually said it, or if you just made it up. And also, even if a scout did say it, we don't know that there's not a scout that said something diametrically opposed to that thing. Agh!!!

Sorry, I'm apparently disproportionately angry over this.

Fuse is pretty awesome.

Seriously, it's like an actual music video channel. What a novel idea. It makes me feel better when I read things like this, which I dub the Whiny Comment of the Day:
"The Yankees aren't trying to develop any starting pitchers!!!!"
Oh, sorry, even if you've totally 100% given up on the idea of Joba ever being a starting pitcher, is Phil Hughes chopped liver?

ahmahgahd

If you think the Yankees could have traded Joba Chamberlain straight-up for Roy Halladay last summer, congratulations, you're really clueless.

Also, the Joba thread at NYYFans.com is perhaps the worst place in the world. "Joba sucks and he's done and the organization killed him but he should be the fifth starter the Yankees are the worst and stupidest organization ever!!!!!!"

arrrgh

I really think some people want AJ and Hughes to be on the DL all season and Andy to like die and the Yankees to suck so they can be all "I TOLD YOU SO!!!" even though there's no way the people they're "telling" will be able to hear what they're saying.

Way to be great Yankee fans, guys!!!

*_* part like the millionth

"I'm not exaggerating," Obama told the crowd, "leaders of the Republican party,
they called the passage of this bill 'Armageddon!' Armageddon. End of freedom as
we know it. So after I signed the bill, I looked around to see if there were any
asteroids falling, or some cracks opening up in the Earth. Turned out it was a
nice day."

So with everything else in my life being kind of crappy right now at least my Barry O. is not disappointing me.

you might be overreacting if

you say the Yankees are "doomed" because they chose Hughes.

Look, I wanted Joba too. This makes me doubt if the FO can develop SP at all or if they're just kind of throwing up their hands and giving up here (please put him in Scranton?). But they are not fucking "doomed" OMG. Hughes is not Sergio Mitre.

this is my impression of the Joba/Hughes fifth starter debate

WAAAAAAAAHHHH

MENTALITY

WAAAHHHHH THE YANKEES DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING

BULL IN A CHINA SHOP


WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

Jon Heyman is dumb, part... a lot

Here you go.

Again, just for reference's sake, from 2009:

Top 10 AL WAR
1. Ben Zobrist 8.6
2. Joe Mauer 8.1
3. Derek Jeter 7.4
4. Evan Longoria 7.2
5. Chone Figgins 6.1
6. Franklin Gutierrez 5.9
7. Kevin Youkilis 5.7
8. Carl Crawford, Miguel Cabrera 5.5
9. Mark Teixeira, Dustin Pedroia 5.2
10. Ichiro Suzuki 5.1
IMO, this list is a little screwy and shows WAR's limitations. It really overvalues defense. I just don't buy that Figgins and Gutierrez were more valuable than Youkilis and Teixiera. I don't think Pedroia and Tex were similarly valuable. I definitely don't think Zobrist was more valuable than Mauer. But it's not AWFUL.

Top 10 NL WAR
1. Albert Pujols 8.5
2. Chase Utley 7.6
3. Hanley Ramirez 7.2
4. Ryan Zimmerman 7.1
5. Prince Fielder 6.8
6. Adrian Gonzalez 6.4
7. Troy Tulowitzki 5.4
8. Derrek Lee 5.3
9. Pablo Sandoval 5.2
10. Matt Kemp 5.0

Top 10 AL VORP
1. Joe Mauer
2. Derek Jeter
3. Ben Zobrist
4. Jason Bartlett
5. Adam Lind
6. Miguel Cabrera
7. Evan Longoria
8. Mark Teixiera
9. Kevin Youkilis
10. Shin-soo Choo

Top 10 NL VORP
1. Albert Pujols
2. Hanley Ramirez
3. Prince Fielder
4. Ryan Braun
5. Pablo Sandoval
6. Chase Utley
7. Troy Tulowitzki
8. Adrian Gonzalez
9. Ryan Zimmerman
10. Joey Votto

Without further ado...

Albert Pujols, Joe Mauer and Zack Greinke should be shoo-ins for the NL MVP, AL MVP and AL Cy Young awards, respectively.
Well at least he got that right.

Chris Carpenter gets the call here in a tight race for NL Cy Young, as he led that league in both winning percentage and ERA. Adam Wainwright and Tim Lincecum aren't terrible choices, either, but the goals, after all, are to win the greatest percentage of games and allow the fewest runs. That's Carpenter.
No. The goal is to be the best pitcher possible, which would generally lead to winning the greatest percentage of games and allowing the fewest runs, all other things being equal. You generally do that by striking out a lot of guys, not walking very many, and getting weak contact on the balls people do hit. This generally does not include yelling at your pathetic offense, "SCORE RUNS!!!" because pitchers have almost nothing to do with that.

Buuuut Carpenter wasn't a bad choice for the Cy Young. There wasn't a shoo-in like there was in the AL. I do like me some advanced stats, but I'm not one of those people that thinks ERA is a quaint stat from a bygone time. ERA is not perfect, but let's not pretend FIP is either.

Miguel Cabrera is omitted from my AL MVP ballot entirely because it's obvious he didn't care enough to give full effort. There is no excuse for a 6 a.m. bender when the pennant's on the line, never mind all the other shenanigans that went along with it.
He had a .942 OPS and a 142 OPS+. He was top ten in WAR and VORP. What he did toward the end of the season doesn't look good at all, and I actually do completely understand people not putting him on the ballot for that. But, and I know it's not sexy to say this, the games in April count the same as the games in late September. The Tigers had been in first place in the division since May 10. That's a pretty damn long stretch of dominance. You know who contributed to that dominance a whole hell of a lot? Their awesome 1B Miggy Cabrera.

Milwaukee's Prince Fielder had a terrific statistical season (.299, 46 homers and 141 RBIs) and will likely make a vast majority of NL MVP ballots, but the "most valuable'' part of the equation is weighed heavily here, as I don't believe players on also-ran teams should win the award.
WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Like what happened with Johan Santana last year, do you not realize how incredibly silly it is to penalize Fielder for something the other 24 guys on his team could or could not do? The Brewers' pitching staff had a collective 83 ERA+ in 2009. That's rancid. Their five main starters had the following ERA and IP totals:
Yovani Gallardo 3.73, 185.2 IP
Braden Looper 5.22, 194.2 IP
Jeff Suppan 5.29, 161.2 IP
Manny Parra 6.36, 140 IP
David Bush 6.38, 114.1 IP
AWFUL. In fact, it's kind of amazing they won any games at all, and were only two games under .500, with a pitching staff like that. You wanna know why they did? Because they had a pretty awesome, potent offense. Led by Prince Fielder and his line of .299/.412/.602/1.014, 168 OPS+.

I skipped stuff...

And remember, the postseason doesn't count.
I know that the postseason literally cannot count because the votes have to be in before the postseason. But the fact that the postseason doesn't count, but your team getting INTO the postseason is of UTTER IMPORTANCE, makes no sense.

1. Albert Pujols, Cardinals: Near-Triple Crown winner had it locked up by June.
Just... thank God he got this one right.

2. Troy Tulowitzki, Rockies: Spectacular talent could have won Comeback Player. Playoff failures don't count.
Tulo: ;_;
Also, Heyman's explanation for this is really bad. "He was really good, but he was really bad last year so he could have won Comeback Player. Also he failed in the playoffs."

3. Ryan Howard, Phillies: May actually be underrated.
No he is not. He's only been playing full-time since 2005, but he has a Rookie of the Year award, a MVP award (undeserved, but not a terrible choice) and a second-place finish in another year when he probably shouldn't have even been in the top ten. I love Ryan Howard, but he is not underrated. Chase Utley is not underrated any more, but he needs more MVP votes than Howard. If you want to call him underrated, I guess I wouldn't have a problem with it.

4. Andre Ethier, Dodgers: Six walk-off hits led league.
Melky Cabrera had three walk-off hits in 2009. Derek Jeter had none. Therefore, Melky Cabrera is a better player than Derek Jeter. Why didn't you vote for Melky Cabrera on your MVP ballot, Jon?!!??!?!

5. Hanley Ramirez, Marlins: Big-time talent earned wrath of teammate Dan Uggla for not playing through pain.
Another AWFUL explanation. "He's really talented. He got into a fight with a teammate one time." WTF??

I skipped stuff.

10. Matt Holliday, Cardinals: As soon as he got to St. Louis, the Cards took off.
He played 63 games. Aaaaghhhhh. At least you didn't vote him #1 or #2 like you did with Manny and Sabathia in 2008, I guess.

NL LVP (Least Valuable Player)
Milton Bradley, Cubs: Alfonso Soriano (20 HRs, 55 RBIs, .241) and Geovany Soto (positive test for pot, .218 batting average) were dreadful, as well. But Bradley was asked to leave the team for the final two weeks. Tough to top that.
Don't get me wrong, none of those guys were great, and Bradley probably did God only knows what in the clubhouse. But Milton Bradley's OPS+ was 99. Soriano's, 84. Soto, 79. Their teammate Mike Fontenot had an OPS+ of 72. So, technically, he was even less valuable than they were. Juuuust saying.

AL MVP

1. Joe Mauer, Twins: Led league in slugging percentage, on-base percentage and batting average as catcher. Runaway winner with Twins a playoff team.
Right. And he would have been the runaway winner if the Twins were in last place if he still posted the stats he did.

2. Mark Teixeira, Yankees: Monster first year in New York, leading the league in home runs (tied with Carlos Pena) and RBIs while manning first base like a Gold Glover.
I love Mark Teixeira and the whining and bitching by Yankee fans over him coming in second in the MVP voting (they weren't saying he should have won; they were saying he should have placed behind Jeter. I agree with this, but they were really, really, REALLY complaining about it. Omg STFU.), but he is a 1B batting third on the New York Yankees, ahead of guys that got on base a lot in 2009, generally Derek Jeter and Johnny Damon.

3. Kevin Youkilis, Red Sox: Feisty, versatile player personifies team.
*sigh*

I skipped stuff.

5. Alex Rodriguez, Yankees: Yanks came together when he joined them after hip surgery.

6. Derek Jeter, Yankees: Improved in every way at 35. Just remarkable.
This makes no sense. A-Rod is an insane player. Mark Teixeira rules. But Derek Jeter is a shortstop. Elite offense at the SS position is much more valuable than the offense of a first baseman.

7. Bobby Abreu, Angels: Mike Scioscia called him their MVP. (Though if Torii Hunter played a full year, Scioscia noted it might have been him.)
WELL IF SCIOSCIA SAYS IT IT MUST BE TRUE

8. Victor Martinez, Red Sox: Versatile hitter was Boston's best player down the stretch. Jason Bay also worthy.
I am a big fan of V-Mart and he did very well with the Red Sox, posting a 133 OPS+. Jason Bay did even better, with a 134 OPS+. And HE WAS THERE THE WHOLE YEAR. Remember how Boston was awesome early on and everyone said ZOMG TEH YANKEES ARE DEAD RED SOX RUUL? That was mainly due to Jason Bay having an insane April/March and May. He was mediocre at best in June and July, but awesome in August and September/October. Jason Bay deserves MVP votes way more than V-Mart.

Skipped stuff.

10. Justin Verlander, Tigers: He's in here for teammate Miguel Cabrera, who would have been third if not for his costly weekend bender, which showed he didn't care.
So basically you didn't put Miggy to spite him but you just put Verlander for shits and giggles? Okay, Jon.

NL Cy Young

1. Carpenter, Cardinals: ERA and winning percentage titles normally a winning combo for this award.

2. Wainwright, Cardinals: The league's top winner is one tough guy.

3. Tim Lincecum, Giants: Tiny Tim a threat to throw a no-hitter every time out.

All of these explanations are so terrible. I'm skipping his choice for "worst" (shocker, it's Brad Lidge), but I'll note he's still using that awful "Cy Old" joke. I'll skip AL MVP, as it's dumb and, once again, if you listed the following guys on your MVP list:
9. Sabathia
10. Verlander

your Cy Young list should not be:
1. Greinke
2. Felix
3. Halladay
I mean, that's a much more acceptable Cy ballot than one with CC in first, but if you think CC was the most valuable pitcher, why isn't he #1 on your Cy ballot?

Skipping stuff, including NL rookie of the year.

AL Rookie of the Year

1. Porcello, Tigers: Became rare 20-year-old to win at least 14 games (Dwight Gooden was another) and pitched beautifully in the deciding game at the Metrodome.
OH SHIT does this mean Porcello is going to get addicted to coke and be pretty much done by like... age 25? (his no-hitter ruled though. The story about it in Birth of a Dynasty, a terrific book which I highly recommend, made me cry like a little bitch.)

Plus, whipped Youkilis.
This is the best sentence in this entire article. (stands and applauds)

Skipped #2...

3. Andrew Bailey, A's: Big-time numbers, but let's face it: He's a closer on a loser.
Holy SHIT.

True story: I have actually met (outside of some meet-and-greet things) two MLB players. Neither were Yankees. One was Andrew Bailey (the other was Rocco Baldelli, who's a sweetheart. Because nobody reads this blog, I can openly say that I'm pretty friendly with the guy. As in I can send him an e-mail right now if I wanted to.). I was at a party with him one time, because one of my best friends goes to Wagner and so did he, and I was visiting her and we went to a party where he was. He's a cool guy, at least from the two or so hours I was in his presence. So I guess he's my boy and I gotta defend him. (He is less so my boy than Rick Porcello, just for the Youkilis beatdown, though.)

Anyway, Jon Heyman says "Fuck you Andrew Bailey. You had an outright nasty year - 83.1 IP, 86.7% SV conversion, 238 ERA+, 9.8 K/9, 3.79 K/BB, 0.876 WHIP - but YOU FUCKING SUCK because YOU CLOSE FOR A LOSER. You clearly should have stalked Brian Cashman and forced him to draft you, then use you to close over Mariano Rivera. Then you'd be on a winner, you loser."

Also, Jon, you know how "loser" teams become non-loser teams? Getting really good players. Like Andrew Bailey.

From AL Manager of the Year:
2. Ron Gardenhire, Twins: Got the $60 million team to the playoffs.
I think Gardenhire's a pretty good manager but it was IN THE AL CENTRAL. They would have been third in the AL West (with the fourth-place team back by only one game) and third in the AL East (and I'm not counting what would probably happen if the unbalanced schedule was going on and the "tough teams" the Twins would have to face 18 times each would be the Yankees and Red Sox, and even the Rays, compared to the Tigers and the White Sox). They wouldn't have won any other division, and they would have been in second in only one other one (NL Central, which has six teams, a whopping two of which were over .500). Heck, they would have been FOURTH IN THE NL WEST (though the unbalanced schedule would probably help them there). I mean, you have to work with the division you're in, but let's not bend over backwards to drool over Gardenhire.

Oh, and from the notes at the end:
Scioscia has been a New York serial killer in the postseason, Mike Vaccaro points out in Monday's Post.
ZOMG he beat them two times. His teams are 6-3 against the Yankees (now they are 8-7). He is a ~serial killer~ I am so scared of him!!!! He made the Yankee pitching vomit in 2002 and forced those guys to crash into each other in the outfield in 2005!

so going back to that really bad article...

Yeah. Here it is.

Just for the record, from 2008:

AL WAR top 10
1. Dustin Pedroia 6.7
2. Grady Sizemore 6.4
3. Nick Markakis 6.3
4. Alex Rodriguez 6.0
5. Joe Mauer 5.8
6. Alex Rios, Kevin Youkilis 5.6
7. Evan Longoria 5.3
8. BJ Upton, Brian Roberts 4.8
9. Milton Bradley 4.6
10. Carlos Quentin 4.5
(pitchers that could be included: Roy Halladay 7.4, Cliff Lee 7.2, Ervin Santana 5.8, AJ Burnett 5.5 [!!!!!!], Mike Mussina 5.3, John Danks 5.2, John Lester 5.1, Josh Beckett 5.0, Zack Greinke 4.9, Javier Vazquez 4.8, Mark Buerhle 4.5. Can someone tell me how Andy Pettitte was worth more WAR in 2008 than 2009? That just seems weird and is one of those things that makes me go o_O about WAR.)

AL VORP top 10
1. Alex Rodriguez
2. Dustin Pedroia
3. Grady Sizemore
4. Josh Hamilton
5. Milton Bradley
6. Joe Mauer
7. Aubrey Huff
8. Ian Kinsler
9. Kevin Youkilis
10. Carlos Quentin

NL WAR top 10
1. Albert Pujols 9.0
2. Chase Utley 8.1
3. Chipper Jones 7.7
4. David Wright 7.4
5. Hanley Ramirez 7.3
6. Lance Berkman 6.9
7. Carlos Beltran 6.7
8. Matt Holliday 6.3
9. Jose Reyes 5.9
10. Ryan Ludwick, Brian McCann 5.7
(pitchers that could be included: Tim Lincecum 7.5, Dan Haren 6.5, Brandon Webb 6.1)

NL VORP top 10
1. Albert Pujols
2. Hanley Ramirez
3. Chipper Jones
4. Lance Berkman
5. David Wright
6. Chase Utley
7. Jose Reyes
8. Matt Holliday
9. Carlos Beltran
10. Ryan Ludwick

These stats are not perfect, but they're the best we have. Oh, and just as a disclaimer, I don't think pitchers should win the MVP (especially relief pitchers). DEAL WITH IT, YO.

In the National League MVP vote, which should be fascinating, the question the voters will have to ask themselves is whether two players who came to the party late can qualify for that coveted seasonal honor.

That is, was a half season of CC Sabathia's dominance and heroics enough to carry him to this year's award? And was less than half a season plenty for that savant turned savior, Manny Ramirez?
No. And no. It wasn't even a half-season, dude. More like a third of a season.

My answer is an enthusiastic yes to both questions.
Wrong answer.

Both candidates are deserving. I don't care that they were late arrivers to the National League this season.
Well, um, you should.

Sabathia (11-2, 1.65 ERA in 17 starts for Milwaukee) and Ramirez (.396, 17 homers, 53 RBIs in 53 games with L.A.) easily made the biggest impacts.
No they didn't. They made the flashiest impacts because they came over late and made contending teams better. You know who made the biggest impacts? The guys who were awesome with their team for the entire year, even if they were on teams that didn't necessarily make the playoffs.

Ryan Howard still looks like the probable winner to me, as he had a big finish and bigger numbers (48 homers, 146 RBIs), which will sway a majority of voters. But just like Ramirez and Sabathia, Howard did almost all his real work over the final few months of the season.

Howard's season stats are larger. But the performances of Ramirez and Sabathia are more remarkable.
None of those guys deserve the MVP. Manny played in 53 games out of 162. CC, 17. Ryan Howard wasn't bad or anything, but he posted his career-low OPS and OPS+ (unless you're counting his 42 PA in 2004, which I am not) of .881 and 124. In today's game, for a 1B, those are generally not MVP numbers.

Also, "Howard did almost all his real work over the final few months of the season"? Sure, he had a .954 OPS in the second half, compared to a .832 OPS in the first. And he had an awesome 1.247 OPS in September/October. But his OPS in August was .791. Not too spectacular.

Johan Santana (16-7, league-leading 2.53 ERA) would be there right at the top of my MVP ballot, too, if not for the Mets' second straight last-minute failure. But thanks to the ineptitude of teammates, Santana's not going to win the MVP.
WHAT? Do you not realize how that doesn't make any sense, to penalize Johan for what the other 24 guys on the roster could or could not do? On the second-to-last day of the season, with the Mets facing elimination, Johan threw a complete game three-hit shutout. That's really fucking impressive. He had a 1.87 ERA in October and September. The Mets' "collapse" (not really, at least not to 2007 standards) was not, AT ALL, due to Johan.

I'm skipping some stuff here.

The AL races don't hold the same sort of allure. Cliff Lee wrapped up the Cy Young by August. As for MVP, no one really stands out among the candidates I keep hearing about.
Oh boo hoo for you, Heyman. It's only your job, for which you get paid a whole heck of a lot more money than I do, to look at these arguments and various stats and come up with a reasonable ballot. You did not. Therefore, I throw things at you from my mother's basement.

With that in mind, I'll take the only AL player who truly had a spectacular season for a contending team. I might be the only one perhaps making this call.
I don't have a very good feeling about this. Just please don't make him say "I'm voting for Derek Jeter" (keep in mind, this is 2008) because I hate it when people make me talk about Derek Jeter's deficiencies waaah.

But without even one truly special or MVP-worthy performance among starting pitchers or starting players on any of the contending AL clubs, I'll take K-Rod for MVP.
WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN...

Here are my full theoretical ballots (since I left the newspaper game, they don't trust me with a real ballot anymore)...
There's a good goddamn reason for that.

NL MVP

1. Manny Ramirez, Dodgers. The savant saved the storied franchise, slugging .743 and lifting the Dodger dogs to the NL West title.
You know, if Arizona had a huge lead in the division when Manny arrived, and then the Dodgers went on a crazy hot streak that gave them the title, I could almost buy this argument. But even then, there would be other factors, not just Manny, I suspect. Also, "saved the storied franchise," WTF?

To be fair to Manny, his performance while wearing Dodger blue in 2008 - .396/.489/.743/1.232, 221 OPS+ - was completely goddamn insane. It was up there with some of Barry Bonds' most crazy years. However, Manny compiled that line in only 53 games. That's about a third of the games the Dodgers played. Arizona was 56-52 before Manny came to the NL West; the Dodgers were 54-54. It wasn't like Arizona was some megasuperuberpowerhouse and the Dodgers were... well... I was going to make some "fighting to crack .500" joke but then I realized that was actually the case, but you know what I mean. In the 53 games Manny played, the Dodgers gained a whole four games on the Diamondbacks to win the division by two games. Don't get me wrong: Manny certainly helped. But if the Dodger pitching pooped out like Dan Haren sort of did (2.62 ERA, .585 OPS against before Manny came to the NL West; 4.87 ERA, .827 OPS against after Manny came to the NL West. Oh and I checked in case you were suggesting those bad numbers were due to facing Manny like every game, he only faced the Manny Dodgers twice. One time Manny beat him up. The other time Manny didn't get a hit), they wouldn't have won that division.

2. CC Sabathia, Brewers. Carried them with three straight outings on three days' rest, and oh yes, had a league-leading seven complete games.
Again, I'm not trying to belittle what CC did for Milwaukee. He was awesome. He started 17 games and pitched 130.2 innings. That means he pitched an average of over seven and two-thirds innings per game. He had a 255 ERA+ in the NL and a ridiculous 5.12 K/BB ratio. He ruled. They probably would not have won the Wild Card without him. But they also probably would not have won the Wild Card without Prince Fielder and Ryan Braun and their 130 OPS+es that played in a whole hell of a lot more games than CC did. Ben Sheets had a 3.09 ERA and 31 starts. Again, I don't think pitchers deserve the MVP, but if I did, I'd think that Ben Sheets and his quiet excellence all year was probably worth more than CC's ridiculous awesomeness for a third of the season.

3. Ryan Howard, Phillies. Huge September (.352, 11 HRs) probably will get him the award.
Thank goodness it did not. He wasn't top ten in WAR, WARP, or even OPS. No way he deserves this. Other 1B were better choices than him. Other Phillies were better choices than him.

4. Brad Lidge, Phillies. Second perfect season for a closer ever. That's 41 for 41 in a park that was supposed to be tough on him.
He had a great season, but he also affected only 69.1 (69, hee hee!) innings. This guy is not one of the Phillies that was a better choice for MVP than Ryan Howard, by the way.

5. Albert Pujols, Cardinals. Kept the Cardinals in the hunt with .357 average despite a banged-up elbow.
Firs things first, batting average is one of the more useless stats. Ichiro hit .352 in 2009 and it was a whole hell of a lot different than Albert's .357 in 2008 (Ichiro walked 47 times including IBBs, and hit 46 XBH. Albert in 2008 walked 138 times in fewer PA and hit 81 XBH. But hey, they're both good contact hitters, so that's that!). Anyway, Pujols was the #1 with-a-bullet choice for MVP in 2008. There was really no other choice. A WAR of 9 is ridiculous and he led in every other advanced stat. He led the league in OPS and OPS+ by quite a bit. Thank God he actually won.

Skipping stuff.

9. Chase Utley, Phillies. Huge start still counts.
I just looked at Utley's splits for 2008, so I didn't realize the difference between his first half and second half (.955 OPS in the first, .855 OPS in the second), which was fairly stark. But still, the whole year counts, you know. He had a .915 OPS and a 135 OPS+, better numbers than Ryan Howard's, as a second baseman, while playing elite defense, on a team that was in a relatively tight division race. He was generally toward the top of most more advanced stats' lists of the best players in baseball and certainly in the NL. Again, Pujols was the only real choice for #1, but it's insane how underrated Utley has been in the MVP voting these past few years.

10. Lance Berkman, Astros. Houston was just a little too late to the party.
You suck, Lance Berkman. You - yes, you, personally - gave the team a situation where they had to use three catchers with these beautiful lines:
.218/.303/.296(!!!!)/.600 (Brad Ausmus)
.226/.270/.298/.567 (Humberto Quintero)
.137/.250/.253/.503 (JR Towles)
Yes, it is your fault that you gave these guys, respectively, 250, 183, and 161 PA. You also kept Michael Bourn and his .588 OPS in the lineup, too. And it's your fault that the starting pitching was either seriously injured (Wandy Rodriguez) or awful (everyone else) aside from Roy Oswalt. Like, seriously, why didn't you keep Roger Clemens on the crazy steroids he was on and force Andy Pettitte at gunpoint to repeat his year from 2005, and then re-sign both those guys? I repeat: YOU SUCK, LANCE BERKMAN.

NL LVP: Andruw Jones, Dodgers. He hit .158. What can you say? The worst ever. And at $18 million, no less. The anti-Manny.
I just wanted to repeat this so we can all goggle at Andruw's 2008 line:
.158/.256/.249/.505, 35 OPS+, 40 wRC+
That is SOME BAD. But according to Fangraphs, he was worth -0.9 WAR. Granted, this was probably helped by the fact that he was held to only 238 PA. But Jeff Francoeur was EVEN WORSE, at a robust -1.2 WAR.

AL MVP

1. Francisco Rodriguez, Angels. An alltime great season with a record 62 saves.
What. What. WHAT.

This was the entire thing that made me want to write this damn article, because it is so incredibly wrong. I don't think pitchers deserve the MVP. I really don't think relief pitchers deserve the MVP. But maybe you do. That's fine. I can understand that. It's the "alltime great season" that absolutely KILLS me here.
K-Rod, 2008: 62/69 SV (89.8%), 68.1 IP, 2.24 ERA, 198 ERA+, 10.1 K/9, 4.5 BB/9, 2.26 K/BB, 1.288 WHIP
Mariano Rivera, 2008: 39/40 SV (97.5%), 70.2 IP, 1.40 ERA, 317 ERA+, 9.8 K/9, 0.8 BB/9, 12.83 K/BB, 0.665 WHIP
Joakim Soria, 2008: 42/45 SV (93.3%), 67.1 IP, 1.60 ERA, 272 ERA+, 8.8 K/9, 2.5 BB/9, 3.47 K/BB, 0.861 WHIP
Joe Nathan, 2008: 39/45 SV (86.7%), 67.2 IP, 1.33 ERA, 314 ERA+, 9.8 K/9, 2.4 BB/9, 4.11 K/BB, 0.901 WHIP

So that's not only one, not only two, but three guys that had better seasons in 2008 alone than K-Rod. K-Rod had a pretty good year, don't get me wrong. But those guys were just... better.

K-Rod's 2008 was really, really not an "alltime great season." Look at Rollie Fingers' 1981 or Dennis Eckersley's 1990 (606 ERA+, 0.614 WHIP, 18.25 K/BB. Lol.). Heck, look at Mariano Rivera's 2008. K-Rod had a pretty damn good year, but it's not even close to an "alltime great" when you stop being a slave to the silly save stat.

I skipped stuff.

3. Dustin Pedroia, Red Sox. The "jockey'' may actually win it with a scrappy attitude and solid stats (118 runs, 54 doubles).
Pedroia was a solid choice for MVP. My fellow Yankee fans like to mock this choice, but it really wasn't bad at all. I probably would have given it to Grady Sizemore, but let's not pretend it was Colon getting the Cy Young in 2005. In a year when there was no real obvious winner in the AL, they gave it to a really good player at a premium position on a playoff team. He led the AL in WAR, though it wasn't overwhelming. But "runs" are more a function of the team's ability than Dustin himself. Pedey's OBP in 2008 was a pretty darn good .376. He was also lucky enough to be on the Red Sox. Put him on the Royals, and he's scoring a lot fewer runs.

4. Justin Morneau, Twins. Without him and his 129 RBIs, what does that lineup look like?
It's kind of funny that you say this, Jon, because without guys like Mauer and Span getting on base before Morneau, he wouldn't have had the opportunity to get those RBIs. Also, please see the thing about Mauer that I wrote later here.

5. Kevin Youkilis, Red Sox. The Red Sox campaign is for Pedroia, but this guy is just as pesky (.569 slugging, 115 RBIs).
Must all Red Sox be described as "pesky" or "scrappy" or "gritty"? Really? Can we just stop this bullshit? Also, I'm not sure a guy with a .569 SLG can really be called "pesky" as much as "super powerful."

6. Joe Nathan, Twins. Another great, underappreciated Twins star.
Who's a relief pitcher.

7. Joe Mauer, Twins. Great two-way catcher who won another batting title (.330) and is easily the best in his business.
Justin Morneau, 2008: .300/.374/.499/.873, 134 OPS+, 129 wRC+, 3.5 WAR
By comparison, remember how Derek Jeter ZOMGSUCKEDHESDONE in 2008? 3.7 WAR. Boom.
Joe Mauer, 2008: .328/.413/.451/.864, 134 OPS+, 135 wRC+, 5.8 WAR
Morneau is a first baseman. Mauer is a catcher. There is no reason why Mauer should have been lower than Morneau on anyone's 2008 ballot. None. (or the 2009 ballot but thank God that didn't happen with anyone)

8. Jermaine Dye, White Sox. Unnoticed star had a nice season.
How can you be "unnoticed" and a "star"?

9. Josh Hamilton, Rangers. As talented as anyone playing, including A-Rod, and 130 RBIs doesn't hurt his cause.
The dig at A-Rod is because...? And the RBIs are a testament to his team's ability to get on base ahead of him more than his ability to hit. Though he is a very, very, very good hitter. .304/.371/.530/.901 134 OPS+ CFs don't exactly grow on trees. He didn't do that great according to WAR but apparently he was an abysmal fielder, so yeah.

Skipped #10 (it was Longo).

AL LVP: Richie Sexson, Mariners, Yankees. Hit .221 overall and was absolutely terrible on both coasts.
Fun fact: I completely forgot Richie Sexson was ever a Yankee. Probably because he had 35 PA. Anyway, in that tiny sample size, he had a .764 OPS for a 101 OPS+. That's not a world-killer. However, it is (very) slightly above average. Which would generally qualify as not "absolutely terrible."


NL Cy Young
1. Santana. Gets edge over CC for ERA title and for being in the NL all year.

2. Sabathia. Sheer second-half dominance.
This makes no goddamn sense. How can you choose Sabathia as your #2 on the MVP (with no other pitcher above him), and then NOT have him #1 on the Cy Young? I don't think he should have gotten either of those, but Heyman's irrationality annoys me.

Also, Ben Sheets sheds a single tear.

3. Lidge. Though tough to leave out Webb and especially Lincecum (18-5, with a league-leading 265 strikeouts) in this year with at least five deserving candidates.
Okay. You could explain why you chose Lidge. He had an awesome year. But he was a relief pitcher. It is insanity to leave off Lincecum, Webb, and Haren, among others, for Lidge.

NL Cy Old:
Oh my God that is the worst pun ever.

Tom Gorzelanny. Ugliest numbers ever, including a demonic 6.66 ERA.
I'm not going to look it up, but I am willing to bet that they are not the ~UGLIEST NUMBERS EVER~.

AL Cy Young
1. Cliff Lee, Indians. Once-in-a-decade type season for this reclamation project (22-3, 2.54 ERA).
I know three years is forever in baseball, but he was only three years removed from finishing fourth in the 2005 Cy Young voting (Jesus, the 2005 Cy Young voting was a hot freaking mess. Bartolo Colon winning was the worst of it, but Mariano getting more votes and more than twice as many first place votes than Johan Santana? Buerhle, Garland, and Millwood getting mega-screwed?).

2. Roy Halladay, Blue Jays. The one pitcher in the league who can complete what he starts (nine complete games).
Any other explanation? No? Oh cool.

3. Francisco Rodriguez. Now holds the alltime saves record.
a. This is the worst explanation ever and not a reason to give someone the Cy Young. Also, it's not even right. Trevor Hoffman has the alltime saves record. (I know what he means. I'm just being picky and whiny.)
b. Again, Jon, you're doing the illogical thing. You can't have K-Rod be your #1 MVP and then only your #3 on your Cy Young ballot. That doesn't make any sense.

AL Cy Old:
That pun still pisses me off. Anyway, I'm skipping his choice (it was the D-Train) and I skipped his ROY selection, though I'm sure they were all dumb (eh, at least he didn't vote for Ellsbury over Longoria. That's something, right?).

NL Manager of the Year

1. Lou Piniella, Cubs. Changed the climate; new moniker should be lovable winners.
Yeahhh maybe not so much. Of course, it's always easy to look dumb in retrospect, but after the postseason and 2009, this is just wrong.

2. Joe Torre, Dodgers. Getting the last laugh from a distance.
Joe Girardi's Yankees, 2008: 89-73
other teams in the AL East: 97-65, 95-67, 86-76, 68-93
Joe Torre's Dodgers, 2008: 84-78
other teams in the NL West: 82-80, 74-88, 72-90, 63-99
Four of the teams in the 2008 AL East would have outright won the NL West. Four. And that's not even including the fact that if you moved them to the NL West, they'd get to beat up on the weak-ass NL West teams as opposed to facing each other over and over again.

3. Charlie Manuel, Phillies. Had the guts to bench Jimmy Rollins -- twice.
WTF? That's not a reason to vote for anyone.

NL Worst Manager: Bobby Cox, Braves. Finally won a one-run game on road, though.
Does this make any sense to anyone? Yeah, stupid Bobby Cox, you forced your GM to trade Mark Teixeira and his 137 OPS+ with Atlanta for Casey Kotchman and his 73 OPS+ with Atlanta! You also gave the team a pretty meh closer who gets hurt a lot! Boooo! I'm pretty sure Bobby Cox absolutely proves that managers are, generally, only as good as the teams they're given. Give him a team with a pretty good offense and an all-time great pitching staff and of course he'll make the playoffs a bunch of times. Doesn't mean he's a genius. Give him a sucky team and it'll suck. Doesn't mean he's a dumbass. No amount of coaching can make Casey Kotchman Mark Teixeira.

AL Manager of the Year

1. Joe Maddon, Rays. Brilliant performance by the Renaissance manager.
No quibble here.

2. Ron Gardenhire, Twins. Twins lost Santana, Torii Hunter and Matt Garza and got better.
Buuuuut probably not as good as they would have been with those guys, you know?

3. Mike Scioscia, Angels. Best in the game, year in and year out.
a. ew
b. if he's the "best in the game" why isn't he #1?

AL Worst Manager: Jim Leyland, Tigers. Got almost nothing out of what seemed like something.
I guess I should just be happy this isn't Girardi, huh?

NL Executive of the Year

1. Jim Hendry, Cubs. Built by far the best team in the NL.

2. Pat Gillick, Phillies. Lidge deal made the difference in the East.
These are two comments that are HILARIOUS in retrospect. I'm skipping stuff, so...

AL Executive of the Year

1. Andrew Friedman, Rays. Turned perennial laughingstock into Yankees/Red Sox slayer.
Not disagreeing with this (and I know what he means), I'm just gently pointing out that the TOTAL FAILURE OMG THEY SUCK SO MUCH 2008 New York Yankees were 11-7 against the 2008 Rays.

The rest of it is pretty banal but oooh, Heyman did one of these for 2009 too. I'll get to that goodness tomorrow (well, later today)

from an article about Dustin Pedroia

It's from ESPN Boston which ew so I will not link, but here you go:

It gets even better. Run Pedroia’s numbers against 25-year-olds regardless of position, and you’ll generate a list of some of the best players in the game: Hanley Ramirez, Miguel Cabrera, David Wright, Albert Pujols, Vladimir Guerrero and Derek Jeter.

Um, through age 25 seasons:
Hanley Ramirez 138 OPS+ (best year: 148 OPS+)
Miguel Cabrera 140 OPS+ (best year: 159 OPS+)
David Wright 139 OPS+ (best year: 149 OPS+)
Albert Pujols 167 OPS+ (best year: 187 OPS+. Just for fun, worst year: 151 OPS+.)
Vladimir Guerrero 146 OPS+ (best year: 162 OPS+)
Derek Jeter 121 OPS+ (best year: 153 OPS+)

Dustin Pedroia 111 OPS+ (best year: 122 OPS+)

Other than maaaaybe Jeter, WTF kind of numbers are you using there?!?!

BASEBALL!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So far SNY has:
1. shown an Andy montage which I appreciated very much. Fuuuck. Show it again!
2. said Jenrry Mejia is comparable to Mariano.
3. talked about how this year is soooo much different than last year for the Mets.
4. JOSE REYES JOSE REYES JOSE REYES

Yo fat guy with a big bald head on SNY, you should not be doing baseball analysis. Yes, you, guy who said Javier Vazquez makes the 2010 Yankees worse that one time, and called Dustin Pedroia "the best player in the AL."

just a note

The number of Red Sox fans that keep bringing up 2004 is astonishing and frankly laughable. I heard someone say that the 2009 World Series didn't count because the Yankees didn't have to go through the Red Sox. OMG! You once won a postseason series against the Yankees!! That means you're so much better than they are and will be for the rest of time!!!!!

Above all, this is pretty much what I found, judging by the comments on the internets.
Red Sox fan bragging about a sweep of the Yankees and first place in the division in April: totally okay.
Yankee fan bragging about a sweep of the Red Sox and first place of the division in August: YOU'RE COUNTING YOUR CHICKENS BEFORE THEY HATCH MORON!!!! REMEMBER 2004!!!!

Dumb things I spotted today

"Roger Clemens was bad in the postseason for the Yankees; they never should have gotten him."

I don't even like Clemens, but postseason career with the Yankees (1999-2003, I'm not counting 2007 because that's what happens when you rely on a like 89-year old to pitch):
3.24 ERA, 1.15 WHIP, 98 K in 100 innings, 2.88 K/BB ratio
BA/OBP/SLG/OPS against: .217/.287/.324/.611 (wow, that's pretty awesome)

Yeah, these starts are in there:
1999 ALCS Game 3 vs. BOS: 2 IP, 5 ER
2000 ALDS Game 1 vs. OAK: 6 IP, 4 ER
2000 ALDS Game 4 vs. OAK: 5 IP, 6 ER
2001 ALDS Game 5 vs. OAK: 4.1 IP, 3 ER
2002 ALDS Game 1 vs. ANA: 5.2 IP, 4 ER
2003 ALCS Game 7 vs. BOS: 4 IP, 3 ER (4 R)
(Maybe he just sucks against Oakland??)

But so are these:
1999 ALDS Game 3 vs. TEX: 7 IP, 0 ER
1999 World Series Game 4 vs. ATL: 7.2 IP, 1 ER
2000 ALCS Game 4 vs. SEA: 9 IP, 0 ER, 15 K (2 BB)
2000 World Series Game 2 vs. NYM: 8 IP, 0 ER, 9 K (0 BB)
2001 World Series Game 3 vs. ARI: 7 IP, 1 ER, 9 K (3 BB)
2001 World Series Game 7 vs. ARI: 6.1 IP, 1 ER, 10 K (1 BB)
2003 ALDS Game 3 vs. MIN: 7 IP, 1 ER
2003 ALCS Game 3 vs. BOS: 6 IP, 2 ER, 7 K (1 BB)


I love Andy Pettitte and I would not bet against him in a big spot. But I've heard Yankee fans - most of whom are the ones I'd guess are smearing Clemens - call him the best postseason pitcher the Yankees ever had and, well, that's just not true. Here are his playoff numbers with the Yankees, 1995-2003:
4.05 ERA, .278/.325/.421/.747, 1.36 WHIP, 118 K in 186.2 IP, 2.27 K/BB ratio.

And here are some starts.
1996 ALDS Game 2 vs. TEX: 6.1 IP, 4 ER, 2 HR
1996 ALCS Game 1 vs. BAL: 7 IP, 4 ER, 2 HR
1996 World Series Game 1 vs. ATL: 2.1 IP, 7 ER
1997 ALDS Game 2 vs. CLE: 5 IP, 7 ER
1998 ALCS Game 3 vs. CLE: 4.2 IP, 6 ER, 4 HR, 3 BB/1 K (poor baby Andy)
1999 World Series Game 3 vs. ATL: 3.2 IP, 5 ER
2000 ALDS Game 5 vs. OAK: 3.2 IP, 5 ER
2001 World Series Game 6 vs. ARI: 2 IP, 6 ER (this one just makes me sad)
2002 ALDS Game 2 vs. ANA: 3 IP, 4 ER
2003 ALCS Game 6 vs. BOS: 5 IP, 4 ER
(He, too, has some genius performances in his long postseason career. But I'm making a point.)

Gah, the morons just made me praise Clemens and smear Andy. That hurt, a lot.

I had ESPN on for two seconds today

And guess who was on. Gene.

He wasn't talking about baseball, he was talking about the Olympics. But I'm sure he was wrong, whatever he was talking about.

OH GOD I FOUND ANOTHER ONE

This is what happens when your boyfriend has to work at night back at home so you are up without someone to cuddle with on Valentine's Day

What's not to like about Philly?
I don't know, maybe you hate cheesesteak?

Fifteen reasons to root for the defending champion Phillies in the World Series

PHILADELPHIA -- Now that the Philadelphia Phillies have put the phinishing touches

AAAAAGHHHHH WHYYYY

on the Los Angeles Dodgers and Mr. Shower Loofah, Manny Ramirez,
So... am I the only one that didn't think this story was such a big friggin' deal? Nobody was freaking out when Burnett said he heard Yankee Stadium absolutely rock - when he was in the shower - during Game 2 of the ALDS.

it's time to turn our attention to the upcoming World Series.

Assuming the New York Yankees will do what the Phillies did -- win their league championship playoff in five games (six, tops) -- we're going to have a New Jersey Turnpike series.
Ol' Gene got lucky that this actually happened. But the entire basis of this article was the Phillies vs. the Yankees. What would have happened if the Angels won? Then this article would have looked incredibly stupid. Well, stupider.

No way are the Yankees going to need a barf bag against the other L.A. (sort of) team, the Angels. If they do, the Steinbrenners will send manager Joe Girardi to go live with Balloon Boy's parents.
lols topical humor or something. Also, Hal Steinbrenner =/= his insanely impulsive and trigger-happy, God bless him, father.

And any non-dumb Yankee fan knows the way the team has played against the Angels the past couple of years (hint: they look like crap against them, often, especially in Anaheim), plus they remembered, you know, that year when The Bad Thing happened. The Yankees had looked better in the ALCS for sure up to that point, but I wasn't going to declare victory in the series until we had four wins, thank you very much.

Anyway, the Yankees will be favored to win the World Series. They've been favored to win it all since Derek Jeter pulled into the team's spring training parking lot in Tampa about nine months ago.
No, they actually haven't been, because ESPN analysts like yourself were too busy drooling over the Red Sox signing Smoltz and Penny and blabbering on about how A-Rod could never deal with the pressure after the whole PED admission thing and talking about how he would suck if he came back. In fact, most experts, rather predictably, didn't even choose the Yankees to win the division; they picked the Sox instead. The Yankees probably should have been favored, but, well, you should have hopped on that bandwagon earlier, hmm?

The Yankees have the most expensive baseball ballpark. They have the priciest baseball roster. They have the biggest baseball expectations.
I started to write something here, but then I fell aslezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

"The Yankees are hot,'' said Phillies manager Charlie Manuel.
With Alex Rodriguez, Derek Jeter, Andy Pettitte, Francisco Cervelli, Phil Hughes, Robinson Cano and his heartbreaking smile, and Mark Teixeira on their roster, this statement is definitely true. Heck, even sometimes Mo can look devastatingly handsome (and sometimes he looks, as SOSH might say, like a bat. I'd rather have a closer that looks like a bat than an anusmouth, though.). Even Johnny Damon was sort of adorable in a goofy way, and his arms were... well his arms were nice to look at. And I do believe I talked about how awesome Posada's ass was the other day. Oh God, I can't believe I wrote about that. ANYWAY!

And the Phillies? The Phillies have the 2008 World Series trophy. They'd like to add the 2009 World Series trophy to their collection.
But don't forget, they are the humble underdogs.

And all they have to do is beat a team with homefield advantage and at least three future Hall of Famers.
Pointing out the Yankees have homefield advantage = kind of important
Pointing out the Yankees have three future Hall of Famers = not that important
Guys like Jeter, Mo, and A-Rod are basically locks for the HoF because they've been playing so long at such high levels. If Ryan Howard and Chase Utley keep up what they're doing, they might be, too. Both teams are really talented. Just saying they're future Hall of Famers doesn't really mean anything at this point, though. Randy Johnson and Greg Maddux are both certain to be first-ballot Hall of Famers, but if I put the 2009 versions of them on the team instead of CC Sabathia and Andy Pettitte, well, that'd give the team five future Hall of Famers but, uh, it wouldn't make the team any better.

"Let me tell you,'' said Manuel, to the Citizens Bank Park sellout crowd after the Phillies 10-4 victory Wednesday night, "we got one more step and we gonna get it.''

I'm not rooting for the Phillies (I'll let John Kruk do the secret cheering), but I can see why you could. In fact, I can see why you should.
I'm not rooting for the Phillies. I'm just going to write an article about why you should root for the Phillies, while simultaneously writing an article about why you should not root for the other team.

Reason No. 1 -- Manuel
He talks like a hick from the sticks. He looks like a guy who repairs tractor axles for a living. But the Phillies don't have any problems translating that thick, western Virginia accent and those country boy sayings of his (Like this one about the impossibility of pitching perfection: "I've got an old saying: 'That Louisville will find you.''').

Huh? Oh -- Louisville, as in Louisville bat. Got it.
None of this is wrong. I really love Charlie Manuel. And all of this is perhaps the most correct thing Woj ever wrote. Though is Charlie saying a perfect game won't ever happen? I dunno, Charlie, there are a couple of (I always forget Javy was the opposing pitcher in that game, weird) 'em that I can remember quite vividly from my lifetime. Including one that happened earlier in the freakin' year!

Manuel wasn't immediately embraced in this city -- not that he cared.
SEE HE IS TOTALLY NOT LIKE GIRARDI WHO CARED BOOOO CARING

He grinded away, won last year's World Series while managing with a heavy heart (his mom had just died), and now has the best postseason record among active managers with at least 20 games of playoff experience. In the last two postseasons, he's a combined 18-5.
Uhhhh, that's a pretty freaking specific and small sample size you picked out to prove your point. Joe Girardi was 5-0 in his first five games in the playoffs as a manger. That's the best postseason record among managers with only five games of playoff experience! (Way to purposefully leave out the '07 sweep at the hands of the Rockies, too, Gene.)

"As I'm sitting here, I know we can win the World Series again,'' said Manuel. Dodgers manager Joe Torre congratulated Manuel in a stadium corridor not far from the Phillies clubhouse. Torre, who won four World Series with the Yankees, knows what Manuel has done.

"Getting to the World Series two years in a row is not easy to do,'' said Torre.
"What is easy," he continued, "is taking all the credit for the performance of very good players I happened to be given by the Yankees' GM and owner, and putting all the blame on these same excellent players, as well as the higher-ups, whenever I failed in any way. And then writing a book about it." (Boom, roasted!!!)

Reason No. 2 -- Pinstripe Overload
The Yankees have made a mind-numbing 48 postseason appearances. They've won 26 World Series titles and 39 pennants. They need another trophy like Mark Teixeira needs another vowel.
Okay, that Teixeira comment was actually pretty funny. But OH NO THE YANKEES WON FIVE TIMES IN A ROW IN THE 1940s AND 1950s!!!! THAT MEANS THEY SHOULDN'T WIN THIS YEAR!!!!!

Meanwhile, you can fit the Phillies' World Series hardware (two since 1883) into George Steinbrenner's Altoids tin.
Yeah, and one of those trophies came last year. When the Yankees didn't make the playoffs. Why are the Phillies underdogs again? They're really lucky they were playing the Yankees in the World Series in 2009, because that's the only way they would ever be viewed as an underdog while they were the defending champions.

Reason No. 3 -- The Philly Phanatic
The Yankees think God invented pinstripes. The Phanatic will lovingly and appropriately mock them.
I love the Philly Phanatic but uhhh... what? Also, how dare the Yankees be proud to be Yankees, probably the most storied franchise in any sport. You know, all those rings you just talked about, Gene?

Reason No. 4 -- Wallet Size
I actually just said "Oh noooooo" out loud.

If you want to root for a franchise that probably spent more money on its 1,400 video monitors at new Yankee Stadium than the Florida Marlins did on their entire payroll, then the Yankees are your team. Their $201-million-plus player payroll (and that's down from a season ago) once again leads the majors.
This shit again? I'm rooting for the Yankees because I was raised a Yankee fan. I've loved them since before I knew what "payroll" even meant. Oh, and the Marlins' owners are way more concerned with pocketing the luxury tax money they get from the Yankees for themselves than having a good team that fans will enjoy. The Yankees' owners want to put the best possible product on the field. HOW DARE THEY!!!!

The Phillies aren't exactly doing their roster on the cheap, but they're still spending about $88 million less than the Yankees.
I'm wondering if Gene wrote an article like this in 2008 about rooting for the Rays over the Phillies, or in 2007 about rooting for the Rockies over the Red Sox. I'm gonna guess not.

Reason No. 5 -- Girlfriend Sightings
Citizens Bank Park is a Kate Hudson-free venue.
A presumably straight male sportswriter doesn't like seeing a gorgeous woman on television while he watches baseball? Okay then.

Reason No. 6 -- Overdog vs. Underdog
Mariano Rivera blows a save as often as Roger Clemens tells the truth about his performance enhancer use.
Obligatory dig at a Yankee!!!

Rivera is the surest thing since sunrises.

The Phillies' Brad Lidge? The leading cause of gnawed fingernails.

Lidge blew more saves than any closer in the big leagues this year. He might have blown more saves than anybody in the Little Leagues this year.

For a while there, he was human lighter fluid.

Nothing against The Sandman, but I'm rooting for The Semi-Flawed One.
Of course you are.

Lidge has been through baseball reliever hell this season. Wouldn't it be amazing if Lidge, not the amazing Rivera, put the Yanks to sleep?
Uh, why would it be? Sure, he went through hell this season, but last season for Lidge was reliever heaven: perfect in save opportunities, a very impressive 48/48, including the playoffs, winning all sorts of "NL Reliever of the Year" awards, and, oh yeah, he got a ring to go along with all of that. Soooo many relief pitchers are dying to have just one year like Lidge's 2008. Try coming up with a metaphor for that that simultaneously demeans the Yankees in some way there, Gene!

Plus, it's not like Mariano is arrogant about his talent or unlikable in any way. You're spite-rooting against him/for the other guy just because he's a Yankee and he's really good at what he does and has been throughout his career. That is ridiculous and dumb. And what happens if the Angels had pulled the win out over the Yankees and it was Lidge vs. Fuentes? It would have been terribly fun, in a sort of schadenfreude-y way, to see Lidge vs. the Rally Monkey or Fuentes vs. the Citizens Bank Bandbox.

Also, if you talk to Yankee haters, because of Game 7 of the 2001 World Series and 2004 (his only bad postseason), you'll hear an endless litany of what a "choker" Mo is and how this means Papelbon/other assorted closers are better. I am serious.

Reason No. 7 -- City Envy
New York is The City That Never Sleeps.

Philadelphia is The City That Has An Inferiority Complex About The City That Never Sleeps.

New York and Philly are separated by a turnpike, about 100 miles and attitude. New Yorkers consider Philadelphia a really nice imitation of Cleveland -- and Philadelphians know it too. Nothing would give this city more pleasure than watching the Phillies slice and dice the Big Apple into baseball submission.
Well I'm sure this isn't going to bring up any sort of controversy at all. And having been to both cities, this New Yorker certainly doesn't consider Philadelphia and Cleveland to be anything alike. And finally, we should root for the Phillies so that Philadelphia can feel a whole bunch of schadenfreude toward New York? And hey Philadelphia (and let's face it, Boston), if you use a friggin' baseball series to make definitive statements about your city compared to ours, that's just pathetic. Yes, I'm aware New York tabloid newspapers were doing this to Philadelphia prior to the series, and that's pathetic too.

Reason No. 8 -- This One's For Harry
Beloved. Adored. Revered. Respected. Remembered. Every single day.

There's a reason why the Phillies keep Harry Kalas' sportcoat and a pair of his loafers in their dugout each game and wear a patch with his initials on their unis. The legendary play-by-play man, who died earlier this season, was, as our Jayson Stark so eloquently wrote at the time, "the soundtrack of Philadelphia Phillies baseball.''

If the Phillies beat the Yankees, Manuel ought to spray champagne on Harry's jacket. For old time's sake.
The 2001 New York Yankees did not win the World Series. In fact, they lost it in about the most heartbreaking way possible. Since then, I've really tired of this whole "x team will win it for _____" thing. Also, again, if the Phillies had played the Angels, there was the whole Nick Adenhart story. Kalas seemed like an amazing person who loved life, and he was a great broadcaster. But he was an old man who died of natural causes. Adenhart's death has to be viewed as more tragic. And the Yankees are doing it for The Boss, too, I suppose.

Reason No. 9 -- Watchability
The Phillies hit four home runs in Wednesday night's NLCS clincher against the Dodgers They've hit 14 homers during this postseason and outscored L.A., 35-16, in the NLCS. No team has scored more runs during these playoffs than Philly.

They hit 224 dingers during the regular season, trailing only the Yankees (244). The Yankees were first in the big leagues in RBIs, runs and total bases. The Phillies were first in the NL in all those categories. They're the closest thing to an AL lineup playing in the other league. Plus, they stole 119 bases.

"They kept coming at us,'' said Torre.

The Phillies' pitching will undergo serious strain against the Yankees' lineup, but …

"Right now, for the National League, we're outstanding and we can stay after you and we can put up a big number on you anytime during the game,'' said Manuel. "And that makes us a real good team.''

Think this Phillies-Yankees thing might be fun?
You should root for the Phillies because they're exciting because they hit a lot of home runs and score a lot. Even though the Yankees actually do those things more, you should totes root for the Phillies. Also, AAAGH THE YANKEES HADN'T WON THEIR SERIES YET!!!!

Reason No. 10 -- Two-peats
No team has won back-to-back World Series since … the Yankees. In fact, the Yanks went three-peat from 1998-1999-2000.
Wasn't that awesome? That was awesome.

And no National League team has gone back-to-back since the 1975-76 Cincinnati Reds.

Be nice to see someone new make a run at dynasty status.
Getting to two World Series in a row pretty much qualifies as "making a run" at a dynasty if that's your bare minimum qualification, I'd say. Also, WAAAH THE PHILLIES ARE RUINING BASEBALL!!! WHERE'S THE PARITY?!?!

Reason No. 11 -- Confessions
That Usher song was really overplayed. For obvious reasons, I don't mind it too much here though. Prettiness.......... anyway.

Admitted PED users on the Yankees: two. Admitted PED users on the Phillies: zero.
Do you see that ADMITTED word? Yeah? It's pretty freaking important. I'd bet good money there are (at least former) PED users on the Phillies, and more than two PED users on the Yankees. Also, players suspended for using banned substances during the 2009 season on the Phillies: one. And all these guys got constantly tested during the playoffs. Yeah, there are probably things that aren't detectible, but let's not pretend that, like, Jeter's gonna be sticking a needle in his ass before every game.

I had a whole rant written up here, but I realize it basically accused a player - who I like very much - of possibly using PEDs, which is incredibly unfair of me, so I took it down. (if you want to get the general gist of it, look at the career leaders in HR/PA.)

Reason No. 12 -- Start Spreading The News
The Yankees play Frank Sinatra's "New York, New York'' on the stadium P.A. system after a win.

The Phillies play Sinatra's "High Hopes'' -- sung by Kalas -- after a win. One is a self-back pat. The other seems more, well, genuine.
I'm not even gonna dignify this with a comment.

Reason No. 13 -- Ryan Howard
A-Rod is, at last, having a postseason to remember, not forget.
Obligatory A-Rod insult. Also, you know, his 2000 postseason was pretty awesome (and his 2004 very good, even with him struggling at the end of the ALCS). But it wasn't with the Yankees so I guess it doesn't count.

But Howard has RBIs and hits in eight of his first nine playoff games this October (he went 0-for-2 Wednesday evening with two walks and a run scored).
When this article was written, before Game 5 of the ALCS, A-Rod had a hit and at least one RBI in all of the postseason games he'd played in 2009. What's your point?

And Howard, who has led or shared the majors lead in regular season RBIs three of the last four seasons, does all of this in a quiet, understated way -- and usually against a huge defensive shift to the right side of the infield.
See, he is QUIET and UNDERSTATED. This is NOT another dig at A-Rod. Why would you think that??? (Also, the dude hits an assload of home runs. That's neither understated nor does it have anything to do with a defensive shift.)

Also, Ryan Howard's placing in the MVP voting since 2006: 1 (not undeserved, Pujols probably should have won though), 5, 2 (in a year when he had an .881 OPS as a 1B; that's good, but many others who appeared lower in the voting had better stats than that, including Chase Utley and his .915 OPS as a 2B and Hanley Ramirez, with a .940 OPS as a SS), 3. He also won Rookie of the Year in 2005. I love the Big Fella, but let's not pretend he's some ignored, underrated guy.

It wasn't much of a surprise, but Howard was named the NLCS MVP (.333, two home runs, eight RBIs).
A-Rod, not named ALCS MVP: .429, three home runs, six RBIs. And the only reason I think he didn't have more was because Scioscia made his pitchers simply stop pitching to him, which Torre never wised up to doing against Howard.

Reason No. 14 -- Home Address
New Yankee Stadium is drop-dead gorgeous. This is indisputable.
Thank you. It is.

But
Oh no.

you need to make A-Rod money to afford a seat in the place. It wasn't built for the people, but for the corporate suites.
I don't make A-Rod money. I am, in fact, unemployed. I went to five games last year.

Citizens Bank Park has the Liberty Bell, but not all the whistles. It is the anti-corporate park. Working stiffs with working stiffs paychecks can actually afford to go to a game. And unlike new Yankee Stadium, there aren't empty luxury couches behind home plate.
YANKEE STADIUM IS SOOOO QUIET AND EMPTY. NOBODY'S THERE TO SEE THE GAME!!!! Yes, please characterize all Yankee fans as snobs and all Philly fans as blue-collar, working-class people. It's just awesome of you, Gene.
I don't argue that way too many of those luxury seats were empty or filled with people that were more interested in ordering sushi and checking their Blackberries than watching the game. I'm just saying, that's not the only type of fan who goes to the frigging ballpark.

Reason No. 15 -- City of Love?
It's hard not to like these Phillies. I'm not saying the Yankees aren't likeable. They are, in sort of a regal way. After all, they're the Yankees.
I'm not saying the Yankees aren't likeable. I'm just writing an entire article about how the Yankees aren't likeable. Oh, and yeah, I know it was after this article was written, but remind me, what team was constantly talking about, among other things, how they'd figured out the other team's closer and how the starting pitchers on the other team weren't anything special? So likeable!

And did you miss when the Yankees started smashing pies in each others' faces after walk-off wins (not that they invented that) and had silly kangaroo courts with Mo in a judges' wig? They were getting criticized for not being regal enough.

But Philadelphia is crazy about this team -- and that doesn't happen very often. Remember, this city's sports motto is brutally consistent: "Philadelphia. We Hate Everybody.''

But not these Phillies. The city bear hugs them. If the most cyncial sports fans on the planet are heads over cleats about these guys, then they must be worth the effort.
That's because they're really good right now. When they're not winning, almost nobody in Philadelphia gives a shit about them, and they go care about the Eagles or the Flyers of the 76ers instead. I went to school so close to Philly that I could basically spit on the city; trust me on this. All teams have frontrunning fans, and I KNOW it looks bad that I started writing extensively about baseball when the Yankees got truly awesome again, but the Phillies have more than their share of frontrunning fans.

Said Phillies reliever Ryan Madson: "I think we're just ordinary guys that just do extraordinary things.''
Are the Phillies the new Red Sox? Please tell me the Phillies are not the new Red Sox. I like the Phillies. I don't want to have to spite-root against them because the media calls them "scrappy," "blue collar," and "gritty," or whatever else.

Now we find out if they can do those things against the extraordinary Yankees.
Or, you know, THE ANGELS, WHO HADN'T BEEN ELIMINATED YET.

In conclusion, Gene's reasons why you should root for the Phillies:
1. They have a funny manager who has been good in two postseasons when he got his team to the World Series.
2. The Yankees won a lot in the past.*
3. ... I can't even make sense of this one.*
4. The Yankees spend a lot of money.*
5. Kate Hudson goes to Yankee games.*
6. Mariano Rivera is good at what he does. This season, Brad Lidge is not.*
7. Philadelphia and New York have a weird relationship and if the Phillies win, Philly will get to feel superior.*
8. An old guy asssociated with the Phillies died.
9. The Phillies hit a lot of home runs and score a lot of runs. The Yankees hit more home runs and score more runs, but you should still cheer for the Phillies.
10. The Phillies might repeat.
11. Nobody on the Phillies has admitted to using PEDs; the Yankees are dirty.*
12. The song the Yankees play after their games is not as "genuine" as the one the Phillies play.*
13. The Phillies have a good player on their team. So do the Yankees but, you know, whatevs.
14. Yankee Stadium is for rich people only. Citizen's Bank Park has working-class people that attend games.*
15. The Yankees are not as likeable as the Phillies, as proven by the fact that Philadelphia supposedly loves the Phillies.*

* The Phillies were not guaranteed to play the Yankees at the point when Gene wrote this article. So basically, if the Angels had played the Phillies, two-thirds of this list wouldn't have been valid. An article about something supposedly totally different that turns into outright Yankee hating/bashing/mocking by ESPN, why I have never heard of something so shocking.

Dumb-dumb article #2

Here, in case you forgot.

Short rest leads to Burnett's short start
Girardi's pitching plan opening opportunity for Phillies to make a miracle comeback

Hold on, let me correct that for you, as anyone that's been watching the Yankees/baseball with any sort of interest knows: Short rest Burnett having a bad Burnett outing leads to Burnett's short start

PHILADELPHIA -- The chance to win a World Series-clinching Game 5 for the New York Yankees is meant for someone with XXL nerves. A.J. Burnett, who lasted all of six outs in Monday night's meltdown, was a size "small."

It turns out the moment was too much -- way too much -- for the Yankees' No. 2 starter.
Yup, just stick that bullshit "choker" label on AJ Burnett. Not like he pitched totally awesome in Game 2 of the Series, which, while not an ACTUAL must-win, was kind of close to one.

Also, if it was supposedly his nerves that caused him to suck, then really, wouldn't it not have mattered if he pitched on normal, short, or 5035829804968 days' rest?

This is why the Philadelphia Phillies, 8-6 winners on a chilled November night, have more than a pulse in this Series; they have an opportunity to pull off a baseball miracle.
Hmmm. May I remind you that these are some excerpts from what you wrote after Game 4, Gene?:
New York is turning a potential classic into a ho-hum romp toward a 27th title

For the sake of a Series predicted to be an actual Fall Classic, it would be nice if the Phillies could somehow push this to a seventh game. But, sigh, I'm not holding my breath.

WAAAAH THE YANKEES ARE GONNA WIN! Also, were you paying attention? The games were really pretty good. There was a pitchers' duel for the first two games, and with these two teams, that's pretty crazy. Even though it was for the team I was rooting against, watching Cliff Lee utterly dominate was kind of awesome. The third game had the Yankees coming back from a 3-0 hole and, of all people, the PITCHER from the AMERICAN LEAGUE TEAM tying the game. The fourth game was just insane. Did you miss the guy stealing two bases on one play?!?!?!

Also, since you made such a big fucking deal about Yankee fans wanting to get on A-Rod's ass after Game 2 because of his past bad performances, may I remind you that the Yankees did something quite a bit worse than blowing a 3-1 series lead a few years ago? I think most Yankee fans recognized that this team was really damn good and probably should win the World Series, but I also think all but the cockiest and dumbest Yankee fans were waiting to pop the champagne until the twenty-seventh out was made in the fourth Yankee win of the series, recognizing that the Phillies were a really darn good team, too, and with the ghost of the Year of Great Evil in the back of their minds.

And Burnett?

"I had no hope tonight," he said.
Well that's at least right.

The Phillies played their last game of the year in Citizens Bank Park, but they haven't played their last game of the postseason. Instead, they tossed Burnett into the garbage disposal, flipped the switch and ground him up for six runs in two-plus innings.

"I had a chance to do something special tonight and I failed and I let a lot of guys in here down and I let a city down," said Burnett, who, to his credit, stood in front of his locker and answered every question.
Holy crap, how did I not know Burnett said that he let the city down?! Now I just feel sorry for the guy.

So back to New York we go for at least one more game and, who knows, maybe a deciding seventh. And wouldn't that be something.
I guess. You know who would be pitching in that seventh game for the Phillies? Maybe Cole Hamels, who had awful luck and a below-average year in 2009, sucked through the playoffs, and said he wanted the season to be over after his Game 3 start. Maybe J.A. Happ, who hadn't started since the NLDS and who had fared poorly there. Maybe Cliff Lee on two days' rest, after a game where he gave up five runs in seven innings when the bottom of the opposing order consisted of Brett Gardner, Jose Molina, and a pitcher.

But first things first, such as asking the same question we asked days before Burnett took the mound for Game 5 and before Andy Pettitte was all but guaranteed the Game 6 start: What is Yankees manager Joe Girardi thinking?
He's thinking that he only has three starters that should be starting in this World Series. He's right.

Girardi started Burnett on three days' rest. He got away with it when CC Sabathia pitched well in Game 4, but the decision exploded in the Yankees' face when Burnett gave it a short-rest go. Burnett isn't Sabathia.
You're right. One's a black guy, one is white. CC is from California; AJ is from Arkansas. I could go on for a while.

In fact, he was barely Burnett in Monday night's no-show.
Here's where you're totally missing it, Gene (can I call you Gene? Cool.). Burnett was absolutely Burnett in Game 5. If you've been watching Yankees baseball for any amount of time, you know it is totally like him to make you drool with a brilliant performance where he's damn near untouchable, and then follow it up with a game where he walks 42 guys and gives up 38 home runs. That's just what he does. And no, it doesn't matter who's behind the plate.

"I just couldn't get the ball where I wanted to," said Burnett, whose fastball spent too much time over the chunky part of the plate and whose curveball arrived with a "Hit Me" invitation attached.

Both Girardi and Burnett insisted the short rest wasn't the reason for Burnett's struggles.

"No, I don't think there was any correlation," Girardi said.

"I felt strong, I felt great," Burnett said. "I just didn't get it done, man."
Yeah. They're right. What's your point?

Burnett does have a history of huge performance swings,
DING DING DING! DING DING DING DING DING, GODDAMN IT! You should have started to write this article, realized this, and stopped writing this article.

but don't the odds for something forgettable increase on fewer days' rest?
No. Well, I should revise that: If you're being run absolutely ragged like CC last year by the Brewers when you've already pitched like 250 innings that year, it might. But one or two short rest starts in the World Fucking Series? No.

And is it a good thing when you begin the biggest start of your career by giving up a liner to Jimmy Rollins on a 1-2 pitch? Then follow it up by nearly breaking every small bone in Shane Victorino's right hand? Then throwing a first-pitch dinger to home run machine Chase Utley? Then walking Ryan Howard, who entered the game with a sub-Mendoza Line batting average?

I'll answer that one: no.
Again, if you've seen a bad AJ start, you would know these all happen in them, minus ~the dramatics~. But no, they are not particularly good things. I don't think anyone would say they were.

Also, Ryan Howard is a very dangerous hitter. I know he had like fifteen bazillion strikeouts in the World Series, and it definitely wasn't a good series for him, but he had a higher OPS there than Mark Teixeira and one only three points lower than Jorge Posada. He did better than Jimmy Rollins and Shane Victorino. Just because he'd been struggling didn't mean he wasn't going to absolutely crush a bad pitch or whatever, especially off a righty, who he hits much better than lefties (like, you know, Andy Pettitte and CC Sabathia, starters of the last two games).

Anyway, it was 3-0 Phillies before Burnett even recorded an out.
Actually, it was 3-1 Phillies, but sure, why bother to get those dumb things called "facts" right?

Burnett eventually got out of the first inning and survived a two-out walk to Rollins in the second inning, then boarded the Disaster Express in the third.

Walk to Utley … walk to Howard … RBI single by Jayson Werth … RBI single by Raul Ibanez … walk of shame to Yankees dugout. Girardi had seen enough and mercifully ended Burnett's night after a 53-pitch (only 28 for strikes), 4-hit, 4-walk, 6-run, 2-strikeout, 1-hit-by-pitch outing.

"When you don't throw strikes, that's what the outcome is going to be," Burnett said.
Again, this is all Bad AJ shit. I mean, this was a REALLY BAD AJ start, but he hit two guys and walked five or six in that one-run performance against the Twins (granted, it was in more innings).

There was always a danger this could happen. Pitching on three days' rest is a dicey thing,
Goddamn it. Not if it's ONE TIME. Not even if it's TWO TIMES.

and Girardi knew it. The numbers said Burnett could handle it (he was 3-0 with a 1.64 ERA on short rest),
Oh look! Numbers, facts, stats!!!!!!! Those numbers are pretty awesome. They're also a pretty small sample size, like so small it basically doesn't count other than to say sure, he could handle it and wouldn't totally blow up Al-Leiter-in-Game-6-of-the-1999-NLCS-style.

but they didn't say anything about combining three days' rest with the pressures of a World Series Game 5 on the road.
Yessss I love talking about intangibles.

You could tell Burnett might be in trouble as early as Sunday night, when he admitted he couldn't treat his Game 5 appearance as another start. You had to admire his honesty, but it was a verbal red flag.

"I try not to think about it too much, but you can't help not to," he said after Monday night's game.
He did seem nervy. But hell, he kept talking about his Game 2 start and he was fantastic there. Again, this was all a case of AJ bein' AJ. And, again, if he was really totally nervous about the start, it wouldn't have mattered if he was on full rest!

Burnett won Game 2, pitching spectacularly (7 innings, 1 run, 9 strikeouts, 2 walks). But that was at Yankee Stadium. And it wasn't on three days' rest or with the opportunity to close out the Series or against Phillies ace Cliff Lee.
What does the opposing pitcher have anything to do with it? And if it did, fine, sure, he wasn't going up against Cliff Lee in Game 2. He was only going up against Pedro Martinez in New York while being down 0-1 in the Series. Pedro 2009 is obviously not the ridiculous peak Pedro of 2000 or so, but he was pitching well and more importantly, if you're speaking about the pressures of facing the opposing pitcher, don't you think that if any Yankee pitcher lost to Pedro, they would have been absolutely torn apart by the press?

Lee gave up five runs over seven-plus innings and 112 pitches -- and that was on full rest. If anything, it shows how difficult it is to face high-powered lineups on fewer days of rest.
No, it showed that Cliff Lee wasn't nearly as sharp in Game 5 as he was in Game 1; that would have been impossible. He's a very good pitcher, but did you think he would have kept up that 0.52 or whatever it was prior to that game postseason ERA forever? Here are the Yankee hitters and their slash lines against Cliffy:
Jeter .407/.467/.519/.985 (30 PA)
Teixeira .391/.462/.696/1.157 (26 PA)
Swisher .333/.458/.444/.903 (24 PA)
Damon .091/.130/.091/.221 (23 PA)
Posada .283/.273/.667/.939 (22 PA)*
A-Rod .333/.450/.733/1.183 (20 PA)
Cano .222/.263/.222/.485 (19 PA)
Matsui .294/.368/.412/.780 (19 PA)
Melky .273/.333/.545/.879 (12 PA)
So as you see, most of them hit him pretty well, save Damon (who, hmmmm, Fox was the only one they talked about with regard to past performance against Lee. Funnily enough, without looking it up, I think Johnny was actually one of the few with a hit against Cliff in Game 1) and Cano. Heck, even Molina had a .909 OPS against the guy, albeit in 11 at-bats. Gardner was .800 in 6 at-bats. I'm not sure how many of these numbers were compiled in 2007 or earlier, when the awesome Cliff Lee we see today and saw in 2008 didn't exist, but these are generally very good numbers, albeit in a SSS.

Girardi hasn't made an official announcement about his Game 6 starter, but he's using all the same managerspeak he used before naming Burnett. In other words, he's going to start 37-year-old Pettitte on three days' rest against a fully rested Pedro Martinez. This is the same Pettitte who admitted after his Game 3 start that he had struggled.
Agh. For one thing, here are the days between starts for Pedro when he was with the Phillies: 5, 4, 4, 5, 4, 4, 5, 10. His last start of the season was on September 30 (and in his last two starts of the season, he threw a combined seven innings), and the next time he pitched was October 16. The next time after that, October 29. So he wasn't on a schedule of regular rest pretty much the entire season and especially the postseason. I think he complained about something hurting him at some point, too, and, IMO, he's way too proud - and managers are way too respectful of him - to go to the bullpen, even at this point in his career. He was frail back when he was one of the awesomest pitchers to ever live; he might still know how to pitch, but he's not that guy any more. And Pettitte said he had nothing because of the rain delay - not that what he said necessarily means anything, he could have been just making that up, and we'll never know how he would have pitched without the rain delay.

"You know, if Andy feels good, he's going to go on Wednesday," Girardi said late Monday night. "This is something we talked about all throughout. We check with our guys. If he feels good, he's going."

Girardi tried to step on the Phillies' throat with Burnett rather than, say, Chad Gaudin.
How is this the wrong move? It's the World Series. You don't throw games. If something gives you a much higher probability to win, you go with that something. In general, AJ Burnett, while not the most reliable pitcher in the world, gives you a much better probability to win a game than Chad Gaudin.

He hoped he could get the Game 2 Burnett. Instead, he got the Burnett who couldn't throw strikes.
Don't you think that if Girardi knew how to get the Burnett that showed up in Game 2, he would have done whatever possible to get him?! And vice-versa, if Girardi knew Burnett was going to utterly implode, don't you think he would have tried to avoid that?

Now he's going to bypass Gaudin again. It isn't a surprise -- Gaudin, who didn't lose any of his six Yankees starts this season (he was 2-0), was phased out of the rotation weeks ago.

"The interesting thing is Chad hasn't thrown much in the last month, and that's a difficult spot to put him in," Girardi said.
Gaudin hadn't started a game since September 28. That was over a month before the World Series. I am quite sure, based on general impression and things the players and pitchers themselves said, that Girardi let the pitchers know he was going with a three-man rotation, and that some of the guys would have to have a start or two on short rest if they were lucky enough to get to the World Series. CC, AJ, and Andy were all well-rested throughout the last through weeks of the regular season. It's not like he was springing this on them.

Also, rather unsurprisingly, Gene's stats are pretty much out of context, as one of Gaudin's wins came in relief, and here are his starts with the Yankees.
8/19 vs. Oakland: 4.1 IP, 0 ER, 5 K, 5 BB
He got pulled with the bases loaded and one out in this game, when the Yankees had a 3-0 lead; Aceves came in and got a DP.
9/3 vs. Toronto: 3.2 IP, 3 ER, 2 K, 3 BB
9/8 vs. Tampa Bay: 6 IP, 1 ER, 6 K, 2 BB
9/16 vs. Toronto: 5.2 IP, 3 ER, 2 K, 1 BB
9/22 vs. Anaheim: 4.2 IP, 2 ER, 3 K, 2 BB
9/28 vs. Kansas City: 6.2 IP, 2 ER, 5 K, 2 BB
The only start I would get excited about in there was the one against Tampa Bay (and just for interesting facts' sake, he also had a really good start against Texas in interleague when he was still with the Padres - 8 IP, 0 R/ER, 1 H, 9 K, 2 BB - and a horrible start against Anaheim - 3 IP, 8 R/ER, 10 H, 1 K, 0 BB, 2 HR. He had both an okay and a very good start against Seattle. Oh, and Texas pretty much destroyed him in a relief appearance during the infamous and extremely frustrating Game Where Swisher Bunted. [I was at the next game and listening to people still complaining about that game was pretty hilarious. Though we all got over it when the Yankees won said game I was at.] So, who knows. Oh, and one other thing I found while digging through Gaudin's stats, this game was sort of hilarious. The Diamondbacks blew a 6-0 lead, including when they were still leading 6-1 going into the bottom of the ninth? Oh, and the thing that tied the game was a three-run home run by David Eckstein?!?!?! But, I digress.). Maybe the Kansas City one, but, I mean, it's the Royals. I was happy with how he did for the Yankees - I thought he was going to out-and-out suck - but the Yankees offense was good enough that he could get away with things like those two starts against Toronto. The Yankee bullpen also had guys that could provide solid innings if he left after, say, less than five innings, when Girardi pulled him before he could get into real trouble. If he was still with the Padres when those happened? Eh.

More importantly, though,
Righties vs. Gaudin: .249/.318/.409/.728, 325 K, 116 BB (2.80 K/BB)
Lefties vs. Gaudin: .293/.389/.433/.822, 140 K, 167 BB (0.84 K/BB)
Putting this guy in Citizens' Bank Park to face the Phillies' lefty-power-hitting-heavy lineup, when he hadn't started in over a month, and had only thrown one very low-leverage inning (the bottom of the ninth in that 10-1 blowout in Anaheim) since the playoffs started, would not have been the greatest of ideas.

It's no more difficult than the spot Girardi put an overhyped and under-rested Burnett in.
Who the hell overhypes AJ Burnett? And AJ Burnett was plenty well-rested toward the end of the season and during the agonizingly long playoffs. One short rest start is not going to make the wheels come off.

It's no more difficult than the spot he'll put an under-rested Pettitte in.
It's only because he feared my wrath that he didn't add the "overhyped" thing with Andy.

Just so you know, Pettitte is 5-7 with a 4.18 ERA in 18 career short-rest starts.

If we have these stats, so does Girardi. Yet he's willing to risk the World Series on it.
AJ's (and presumably CC's) great career numbers on short rest = don't count
Pettitte's not-great career numbers on short rest = OF DIRE IMPORTANCE!!!!

Also, Andy Pettitte in the playoffs on three days' rest: 3-1, 2.88 ERA. LOOK I CAN THROW AROUND STATS OUT OF CONTEXT TOO!!!! (For clarification, obviously those numbers are great. They're also a tiny, tiny sample size, and the most recent of those starts was in 2003. Also - dammit, why do I get so distracted by random stats?! - in the first four games he started of the 1996 postseason, Pettitte gave up seven home runs. Poor baby.)

And well, Gene, if you ever did anything good, you gave me an excuse to watch this video again to see that stat. Mmmm, thank you for that. Just FYI, I got distracted for like twenty minutes watching that. So. Freaking. Hot. Um, anyway.

No team has recovered from a 3-1 Series deficit since 1985, when the Kansas City Royals beat the St. Louis Cardinals. It couldn't happen again, could it?
Of course it could happen again. It's rare, but I'll bet it happens sometime again. Heck, some day some team will probably come back from an 0-3 series hole again, too.

If it does, the Phillies' miracle comeback would be completed on the number everyone is talking about.

Three days.
ZOMG you are teh clever. Also, I know you wanted to paint the Phillies as some cute underdogs, Gene, but it wouldn't really be a "miracle."

How long until baseball and America's Next Top Model start up again so I can stop spending time on this crap?!


* How is his BA better than his OBP? Posada can't even do stats right!!!