my thoughts on Oscar dresses (because that's all that really matters)

Only Sandra Bullock and Cameron Diaz looked really great. It was a nice of blah. Kristen Stewart looked okay, but she looks so miserable and hunched-over all the time and this annoys me.

Tina Fey's dress was really unflattering.

Sarah Jessica Parker was a mess. Unflattering and ugly.

Charlize Theron's dress had boob flowers. WTF?

Vera Farmiga looked like she was getting attacked by a giant red tapeworm. Some bad. I can't believe that was Marchesa. ;_;

Meryl Streep's outfit was sort of boxy and unflattering. :(

Miley Cyrus looked absolutely terrible.

Zoe Saldana had a weird dress but you know what? Bitch pulled it off. And it was SPARKLY!

Penelope Cruz = meh

Kate Winslet = meh (NOOOO!!!!)

Diane Kruger = WTF?

Anna Kendrick and Amanda Seyfried competed for the TOTALLY BLAH award. I have not decided who the winner is. I guess Seyfried, because she is pretty blah in general and Anna ruled in Up in the Air.

I know this happens after every Oscars but...

Jesus Christ, people, what the hell did Avatar and Sandra Bullock do to you personally?

zzzzz

Well that was boring.

Whatever, I'm just HAPPY I GOT TO SEE THEM!!!!

OMGGGG

Just in case any of you cared, ABC came back just in time for the Oscars!!!!

Unfortunately, they've been REALLY boring. zzzzzz But whatever, OSCARS!!!!

I literally screamed "motherfucker!" out loud

ABC officially went off the air because Cablevision consists of a bunch of whiny babies apparently.

I SWEAR TO GOD IF I MISS THE OSCARS, I SWEAR...

(And Blogger got me with the "conflicting edits!" bullshit again. No, I can't just press the back button because your stupid-ass thing doesn't save the text in the body of the post!!!! I have to go all the way back to blogger.com and look at it there. AAAGHHHH)

OSCAR PREDIX!!!!!

If I even get to see the Oscars this year, motherfuckers on Cablevision or whatever it is.

Best Picture: Avatar (alt. The Hurt Locker)
Best Director: THE LADY (alt. James Cameron)
Best Actor: Jeff Bridges, Crazy Heart (alt. George Clooney, Up in the Air)
Best Actress: Sandra Bullock, The Blind Side (alt. Meryl Streep, Julie and Julia)
Best Supporting Actor: Christoph Waltz, Inglorious Bastards (alt. no one needed. But Harrelson)
Best Supporting Actress: Mo'Nique, Precious (alt. no one needed. But Gyllenhaal)
Best Original Screenplay: Inglorious Bastards (alt. The Hurt Locker)
Best Adapted Screenplay: Up in the Air (alt. Precious)
Best Animated Feature: Up (alt. none needed)
Best Foreign Film: The White Ribbon (alt. Un Prophete)


Sadly, I don't care or know enough about the other categories this year to make a prediction. Is there a movie that's really pretty? It'll win Cinematography. Is there a movie with lots of period costumes? It'll win Best Costumes. Is there a movie that made you feel like throwing up when you saw it because of the weird camera angles and whatnot? It'll win Best Editing.

oh, crap!

I still need to do my Oscar predictions. Later, though.

Hey, Tino Martinez's commentary doesn't make me want to shoot myself when he's in the YES booth!!!

uh oh

Please let me see the Oscars please please please.

Holy crap Oscars in a week!!!

That's all. Wow, remember when this was a movie blog?!

OSCARS!!!!

I told y'all I'd talk about them and I meant it!!

Best Picture
'Avatar'
'The Blind Side'
'District 9'
'An Education'
'The Hurt Locker'
'Inglourious Basterds'
'Precious'
'A Serious Man'
'Up'
'Up in the Air'
So... many... movies... anyway, like I said, I told you The Hangover wasn't getting nominated. From what I've heard, The Blind Side definitely didn't deserve it, though, which pretty much makes me think Sandra Bullock is a lock for the Best Actress trophy. Nine and The Lovely Bones must have really sucked not to get nominated here with ten freakin' movies. I can't believe I still haven't seen Up. I suck. Anyway, the few movies I did see here are excellent.

Best Director
Kathryn Bigelow 'The Hurt Locker'
James Cameron 'Avatar'
Lee Daniels 'Precious'
Jason Reitman 'Up in the Air'
Quentin Tarantino 'Inglourious Basterds'
Hey look, a lady!!! Also, I think the whole "do a WWII film, get nominated for an Oscar" thing is totally true. Inglorious Bastards was great, but the Kill Bills were better, and neither of those sniffed the nominations.

Best Actor
Jeff Bridges 'Crazy Heart'
George Clooney 'Up in the Air'
Colin Firth 'A Single Man'
Morgan Freeman 'Invictus'
Jeremy Renner 'The Hurt Locker'
The Academy really liked The Hurt Locker. And, as ever, they love Morgan Freeman. Is this Colin Firth's first Oscar nomination?!?!?! Yayayayay!!! I'm pretty sure this is Bridges' to lose, though. I mean, I'm barely paying attention this awards season and I know the winners are gonna be Bridges, Bullock, Waltz, and Mo'Nique.

Best Actress
Sandra Bullock 'The Blind Side'
Helen Mirren 'The Last Station'
Carey Mulligan 'An Education'
Gabourey Sidibe 'Precious'
Meryl Streep 'Julie and Julia'
I only saw Meryl, but I've heard great things about all of these ladies. Though I'm kind of annoyed that Sandra Bullock is gonna win an Oscar for (what seems like) a Nice White Lady movie.

Best Supporting Actor
Matt Damon 'Invictus'
Woody Harrelson 'The Messenger'
Christopher Plummer 'The Last Station'
Stanley Tucci 'The Lovely Bones'
Christoph Waltz 'Inglourious Basterds'
MAAAAATT DAAAAAMON. Anyway. Kinda cool to see pretty much small movies being nominated here, all the way.

Best Supporting Actress
Penelope Cruz 'Nine'
Vera Farmiga 'Up in the Air'
Maggie Gyllenhaal 'Crazy Heart'
Anna Kendrick 'Up in the Air'
Mo'nique 'Precious'
Is Penelope Cruz gonna get nominated for everything now? Ewwww

Best Original Screenplay
Mark Boal 'The Hurt Locker'
Quentin Tarantino 'Inglourious Basterds'
Alessandro Camon and Oren Moverman 'The Messenger'
Joel Coen and Ethan Coen 'A Serious Man'
Peter Docter, Bob Peterson, Tom McCarthy 'Up'
Sure. Quentin Tarantino should basically be nominated for anything he writes. That guy is good.

Best Adapted Screenplay
Neill Blomkamp and Terri Tatchell 'District 9'
Nick Hornby 'An Education'
Jesse Armstrong, Simon Blackwell, Armando Iannucci, Tony Roche 'In the Loop'
Geoffrey Fletcher 'Precious'
Jason Reitman, Sheldon Turner 'Up in the Air'
I've never heard of In the Loop. Like, at all. This is what happens when you stop paying attention to movies. Like, Avatar passed Titanic?! What?! That's crazy talk. Anyway, District 9 had pretty much the most obvious metaphor ever serving as its main plot device. Booo. Up in the Air was damn awesome, though.

but first...

I told y'all they wouldn't nominate The Hangover for Best Picture, even with 2068042860 Best Picture nominees.

Oscar noms are out!!!

More later!

I approve!

Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin to host the Oscars. Awesome!

Good movies.

The Talented Mr. Ripley is one of them.

Man, remember when I used to talk about movies like ALL THE TIME here? Maybe I should see the few things with Oscar hype, like Precious or An Education (hey Peter Sarsgaard, 'sup).

Amelia

This looks awful.

Also, it's late-ish October. When are the Oscar-bait films coming out? Besides Saw VI, I mean.

Oh, Entertainment Weekly

On the front page of your website, you currently have an article titled "The Hangover: Oscar Contender?" The basic gist of it is "ZOMG TEN MOVIES ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN FOR REALZ!!!!" Yeah. Anything can happen. Anything except The Hangover getting nominated for Best Picture.

Guys, I am SO LAME.

I just saw a trailer for The Lucky Ones and honestly, I freaking cried AT THE TRAILER. Was this movie so unbelievably bad that it just kind of came out without any sort of fanfare? Cuz like, it's about the military and has Tim Robbins and the Oscars usually love stuff like that...

Julie and Julia thoughts, pre-movie.

I hear a lot of "oh this is just gonna be a fluffy comedy and there's no chance for Oscar noms for Meryl or Amy." I'm not sure. I read the book, and while I didn't really like it, Amy Adams has a fairly substantial, juicy role in it. Meryl Streep's role is obviously going to be changed because, if you've read the book, the only role she has is that the author republishes letters Julia Child wrote. I don't know what the reviews of this movie will be, which may knock it out for the count, but it's not... like... The Hangover (which I LOVE, in case you missed that) in terms of lack of Oscar potential.

So yeah. Get that Oscar nom, Jesus & Meryl. Meryl can get nominated for anything at this point - you know the only reason she didn't get in for (blech! puke!) Mamma Mia! last year was because she had Doubt to get the nomination from - and Jesus needs another nomination to make up for the fact that she was nominated for her crappy Doubt performance and not Enchanted because I'm a crazy person like that.

Um.

10 movies nominated for Best Picture? Of course, they do this the year after Wall-E and The Dark Knight possibly could have gotten in.

... of course, the last time there were 10 movies nominated for BP, Casablanca won. So, if we get a film that's as good as that to win, I'll be mighty pleased.

If you haven't figured it out...

Sorry, but I don't think there's going to be one big Oscar post this year. :( There wasn't all that much to snark on anyway. Yaaaay Kate won an Oscar, Anne Hathaway is an attention whore, JAI HOOOOOOOOO, Hugh Jackman is charming but was on screen for like .02 seconds, etc.