I finally get to comment on all the SAG and Oscar fashions. Yup, I'm late, but I'm finally without work and it's a slow few movie months... and yeah, I get lazy commenting on guys' looks unless they're...odd.
SAG
America Ferrera: Gorgeous and classy; she always looks amazing. A candidate for best-dressed of the night for sure.
Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt: I know this was divisive, but I love what she was wearing. It's definitely not traditional, and I don't even like her that much, but she was really pulling it off. Brad Pitt always looks hot, but that outfit needs to be a tad more red-carpet-ish...
Angela Kinsey: I love her and I think she looks great. She's totally adorable. It amuses me so much how much she's not like her character in real life.
Kyra Sedgwick & Kevin Bacon: Something's a little off about her dress, I dunno. It's too...boring, besides its fantastic color. Kevin needs to do his hair a different way.
Cate Blanchett: I'm really not crazy about her dress. I know it has a pattern, but instead it looks like Jackson Pollock got ahold of it...
Rebecca Romijn: What? You're hot, Rebecca? Oh my God, I didn't realize that the first 1500808 times you tried to drill that into my head. I got it now.
Dana Delany: Bad prom dress.
Rebecca Gayheart & Eric Dane: She's got one hell of a bitchface in the picture they have of her, and the dress she has on is a tad ridiculous but I kind of love it. Eric Dane is pretty hot.
Diane Lane: Bad haircut and terrible pose in the picture they have. The dress is okay but kind of pancakes her chest.
Ellen Page: What? Ellen Page wore a boring black dress? How unexpected.
Edie Falco (and James Gandolfini): I can't see much of it, but it looks really really boring.
Jamie-Lynn Sigler: I would definitely like it more if it was all one color instead of having the weird cutoff at the boobs.
Jane Krakowski: I love her, but it's an awful color and the straight-from-the-arts-and-crafts store neck thing is even worse. Oh, Jane. Shame, shame, shame.
January Jones: I want to say it's horrible, and yet the color is amazing and I know if I was a celebrity I would so wear something like that. So yeah, I kind of love it.
Ellen Pompeo: Is she wearing tinfoil? I actually like it. It makes her look not emaciated and it's interesting without being weird.
Allison Janney: Fantastic dress. Why didn't I see her in more places?
Jeanne Tripplehorn: Boring and shapeless.
Kate Beckinsale: It's always lovely to see colors (especially if they're not red, which got kind of overplayed this award season). I think I would have liked it better without the little bow thing at the hip, but it's still a great dress.
Katrina Bowden: Makes her look pregnant.
Marg Helgenberger: What's more boring than a straight up-and-down black dress? Not much.
Melora Hardin: That's such a nuts dress, but I kind of like it. I wouldn't expect any less from Miss Jan Levinson.
Michelle Pfeiffer: Boring. Just like the actress herself. Yup, I said it.
Ashley Tisdale: I thought her dress was fantastic - very clean lines and a nice color. Good hair too.
Nicolette Sheridan: Has she ever worn anything good to an awards show?
Carla Gugino: Like I said, red's getting overplayed, but it still definitely gets attention. This cut is great and interesting, too.
Sophia Bush: It's odd, but I kind of like it.
Teri Hatcher: It's okay. It fits oddly around her midsection.
Tina Fey: BOOORING. But she's so awesome it's excused.
Viggo Mortensen: If any actor is guilty of fucking with their own innate hotness, it's so Viggo. WHAT ARE YOU DOING, DUDE??!??!
Sandra Oh: I know it's crazy, but it's a tribute to her heritage, right? And it's actually kind of beautiful. I mean, she's got every right to wear it, so yeah. *shrug*
Chandra Wilson: HORRIBLE. I love metallics a shitload, too, but there's a right way to wear them and there's...this.
Becki Newton: I likey. Very interesting.
Eva Longoria: Great dress, and does she ever not look gorgeous?
Brittany Snow: Fucking fabulous. Like I said, I love me some metallics, and this is so the right way to wear 'em. Second-best-dressed of the night.
Jenna Fischer: Oh how I love Pam Beesley and covet her pretty pretty red hair (and her pretty pretty boyfriend). I liked her dress a lot too, but it wasn't blow-your-mind fantastic.
Mindy Kaling: Kelly would shriek in horror, Mindy. You should have ironed it and made it not quite so tight.
Nikki Blonsky: It's so...bright.
Debra Messing & Christina Applegate: Debra's a meh? I like gold dresses, but this one just seemed odd, plus the hair is horrendous. However, Christina was the best-dressed of the night. That dress is pretty simple, but awesome.
Amanda Bynes: Fantastic color, good chest-area (the patterning, you pervs), but I hate the hemline and I don't like the hair. So, meh.
Ana Ortiz: It looks like it got a little staticky in the dryer and is sticking to itself, but I still really like it for some reason.
Andrea Bowen: It's fine until it hits the mid-thigh. Then, it turns terrible, just because they feel the need to change the texture or whatever.
Sara Ramirez & Brooke Smith: Sara's is great because that color is faaantastic. Brooke's is horrible. It looks like a combination between lingerie (not appropriate for the red carpet), weird body hair (I don't think girls want to call up that association), and the black webbing stuff from Spider-Man 3.
Lisa Rinna: Leopard print? Really? :(
OSCARS
Johnny Depp & Vanessa Paradis: Yeah, I still don't get Johnny Depp, and I don't think I ever will. Vanessa's dress rocks though.
Calista Flockhart: Boring, I so don't like those kinds of necklines, and terrible hair.
Nicole Kidman: It was pretty nuts. It would have been totally boring without the necklaces, though.
Casey Affleck & Summer Phoenix: HAHA, I LOVE TV GUIDE'S COMMENT. A fine dress, but, um, it needed, uh, more...coverage.
Laura Linney: Laura Linney always looks lovely. ;) This was boring, though - but I loved the necklace and fantastic hair, plus a smile to make the heavens cry.
Nancy Walls & Steve Carell: LOVE. Nancy Walls' dress isn't amazing, but hey, she pulled off satin. That's not easy.
Marion Cotillard: I don't know why people hated it. That dress was fantastic (except for the weird flower nipples).
Javier Bardem & Julian Schnabel: Javier's dreamy. Julian should never give up on the weird clothes.
Renee Zellweger: I think I said it before, but I'll say it again - her dress was amazing and flawless and had it been on someone else everyone would be freaking out about it. Just gorgeous.
Diane Lane: Kind of boring, but I liked the detail and she looked so pretty.
Ellen Page: Soooo boring... at least her SAG dress had a shape to it...
Sissy Spacek: She was there? It's odd, obviously, but she kind of pulls it off. Yaaayyy Sissy.
Cate Blanchett: I loved it, but apparently many didn't. Whatever, it's awesome.
Colin Farrell: COMB YOUR HAIR.
Tilda Swinton: Yeah, it's totally weird and kind of horrible, but let's face it, were we expecting anything less? I would have been so disappointed if she showed up in like, your average gown...
George Clooney & Sarah Larson: George = AHHHHH, GEORGE. He will never not look flawless. Sarah Larson's a very pretty girl and she has a very pretty dress, but it looks a little like...a really expensive rug.
Katherine Heigl: Flawless and gorgeous. Great hair too.
Jennifer Garner: She needed to get her hair out of her face, and she's worn better things at, like, movie premieres (hey, anyone remember The Kingdom????!!!!), but this is still a great dress. Fantastic alternative to the basic black.
Julie Christie: I love what TV Guide said about the outfit not being great, but that she still looks fantastic. It's all true. That said, the outfit would be much better without the gloves or pin, and if it came to a better point on her legs. And obviously, without the wrinkles.
Keisha Whitaker: She's gorgeous. This is much better than that dress she had last year. I love basic white/black dresses with fun, interesting details.
Keri Russell: Kind of boring, and I didn't like the hair.
Hilary Swank, Spike Lee, and Wesley Snipes: What a weird group. Anyway, I loved Hilary's dress, and Spike and Wesley looked bizarre but they should never change.
Alan Arkin & wife: Meh? I like his wife's dress but those gloves are awful. Gloves are always awful!!!
Penelope Cruz: She still doesn't do it for me. I think she looks like a chipmunk, and the dress really didn't need the part with the feathers at the knees.
Viggo Mortensen: Again, fucking with the hotness. And TV Guide's caption is too funny.
Cameron Diaz: It needed some ironing, but I really liked it. It looked really soft and pretty, and I thought it made it interesting and gave her some more curves.
P. Diddy & Faye Dunaway (!??!?!?!): Faye is actually kind of...pulling that dress off...
Daniel Day-Lewis & Rebecca Miller: Yup, what they were wearing was insane. But I and others have talked about this, so yeah.
Dennis Hopper & date: Haha, Dennis Hopper. I actually think what his date is wearing is pretty damn fantastic, even if it could be a little less baggy on the top.
Helen Mirren: Fucking amazing dress. I don't really like sleeves on dresses usually, but this was a totally great and original way to work them in. Does she ever not look amazing?
Hilary Swank: ...yeah we went over this already
Jessica Alba: It probably would have been better without the feathers, and nothing will top that gold dress she wore a few years ago, but this was still great. She's just so pretty.
Jennifer Hudson: It looked extraordinarily cheap.
Marlee Matlin: That's a totally adorable picture of her, and I like her dress (part of it is obscured, so I can't really see it).
Anne Hathaway: It's a great dress, but ... she's just not pulling it off somehow. I like to think that this is for a reason other than I just don't like her, but yeah, probably not. Anne Hathaway needs to wear less makeup; her features are already huge, and with tons of lipstick and eye makeup, she looks like a friggin' cartoon. It's only when she looks more natural that I think, "Okay, I can kinda see where people are coming from when they say she's gorgeous...sort of...okay not really, but at least she looks pretty." Yes, my inner thoughts are so complex.
Amy Adams: Loved the color and the hair (any time anyone has red hair, it is guaranteed I will love their hair), but the cut is a little...I dunno. It's good, but not amazing. But she's, you know, Jesus, so all is forgiven.
Amy Ryan: Very simple, borderline boring. If it was black, it would be a snoozer, but being navy keeps it just good enough.
Jason Bateman & Amanda Anka: Bateman is suave, and I love him and find him innately charming so I was all like :( over the use of him in Juno. Her dress is...odd. I don't like it.
Diablo Cody: Yup, it's insane. But, like Tilda Swinton, I wouldn't have expected any less.
Gary Busey & date: Busey actually looks okay for an insane man. His date's dress is awful.
James McAvoy & Anne-Marie Duff: James needs to shave and fix his hair, because he looks kind of terrible, and he'll be so much hotter (c'mon James, I've seen you do it). His wife's dress is a great color and shape, but the ruffles are bad.
Kristin Chenoweth: Is it really see-through? Yikes.
Lisa Rinna: Similar cut to Amy Adams', but way more boring because it's navy. Looking closer, though, it does have some interesting details on the bodice.
Melora Hardin: Why does she always wear insane things? (I guess it's because Jan aspires to be a whore.) This isn't as insane or unsalvagable as the SAG one, though. In fact, without the sleeves and the tassels (oh God, the tassels!), I think I would love it.
Miley Cyrus: I actually liked it. I thought it was a really pretty shade of red, but also actually age-appropriate and a cute cut. Much better than the Grammy ensemble I saw where she was wearing 2058068 pounds of makeup.
Patrick Dempsey & Jillian Dempsey: Patrick is much like the Clooney in that he's suave and always looks fantastic. Jillian's dress is kinda boring, but it's a great color.
Seth Rogen & Jonah Hill: Yeahhhh.
Saoirse Ronan: It's a nice color, but a weird cut. I don't like the sleeves or the detail under the bust.
Heidi Klum & Seal: Gorgeous couple. Her dress is kinda nuts, but I still like it...
Kelly Preston & John Travolta: John sprayed on his hair. Kelly's dress is a nice color but I hate the hem.
Tom Wilkinson & his daughter Alice: What's up with his daughter's bag? I see people carrying that thing to class every day!
THEEEEE ENDDDD.
