Because Andy kind of owned this episode and Ed Helms needs an Emmy for it now (Steve Carell too, but he deserves an Emmy for every darn episode, and Rainn Wilson's been incredible this season as well). I am more vehement about this than I am about anything John Krasinski or Jenna Fischer have done this season, so that should say a lot. This is gonna be... long, folks (TWSS!).
The cold open was fucking epic, the third-best ever behind only "Traveling Salesmen" (HARVEY) and "The Injury" (an episode a bit like this one, where everything was very broad, but everything was very hilarious so it worked). It just got bigger and bigger and funnier and funnier. SAVE BANDIT! THE FIRE IS SHOOTING AT US!! BARACK IS PRESIDENT!!!
Can we all stop bitching about Pam's outfit and hair now? Look, she wore a boring cardigan/button-down combo, but it was in a non-pastel color and it was vaguely flattering (I do understand the complaints about the shirts with the bows and the puffy sleeves and whatnot, because as a girl, I'm always like OMG THOSE SHIRTS ARE SOOOO CUUUUTE and I buy them and they're actually a pain in the ass because the bows are always annoying and puffy sleeves kind of constrict your arms). Her hair was a great combination between her S1/2/3 hair and the S4/5 hair. So she still looks dowdy, but she's not making herself look ten years older and not pretty. YAY, COMPROMISE.
Love the new credits. I know they were probably just for the Super Bowl, but they were great. This show is and always will be an awesome ensemble. The clips from old episodes were great; work @ the JAM kiss.
David Wallace in the Super Bowl episode? Bestill my heart! Both meetings with Corporate were hilarious and awesome.
All of Michael's THs were awesome too. "An office is a place where dreams come true." Michael knew what to do, but he didn't know what to do. "That one makes me think of... death. ... It's kinda nice." "You never expect that you're the killer. It's a great twist." Talking about "boss" as slang and how great he looks in shoulder pads and perms. The spaceman on a star. Laughter is the best medicine so Stanley doesn't need his pills... but maybe he should hold on to them anyway.
The Stanley montage. Hahaha. Great intro for new viewers, great memories for the die-hards, hilarious for both. "I'm going to die."
Michael's reference to Glengarry Glen Ross which, of course, was famously given life on-screen by Alec Baldwin. Oh, NBC, must you always promote 30 Rock? ;)
Yay, conference room scenes. I think what this season has been missing for me, if anything, is conference room scenes. Seriously, they're always fucking hysterical. This one was no exception, with Michael mixing up "Staying Alive" and "I Will Survive," the group sing-a-long to "Staying Alive" including Kelly's dancing, and then Dwight harvesting organs from the dummy (!).
"You were in the parking lot earlier, that's how I know you!"
I heard people say that Jessica Alba being on the show means it's jumped the shark. Um, wut? Dude, you are being melodramatic. She was on for .005 seconds. A lot of people didn't like the pirated movie storyline, but I did. Jack Black was really, really funny in it (in the first segment of the movie, he has a face right before Pam's phone rings for the first time that is Jim-worthy), the running gag of the terrible music cracked me up and the group I watched this episode with (a couple of die-hards, a bunch who watch the show fairly often, a bunch that haven't ever seen it or have just seen a few episodes here and there), but more importantly, it allowed the writers to deal with the JAM storyline in a way that, thank God, was integrated into the office as a whole and saved it from being The Office, And This Really Cute Couple That Works There But Doesn't Really Have Anything To Do With The Rest Of It All. It gave a slight comic beat to what could have been melodrama. Plus, more funny Andy, so YAY. "M'lady, m'tuna..." and his sad popcorn. AHAHAHAHA
Dual JAM talking heads! And yes, the JAM sideplot in this episode worked great. That last scene of the two of them, ugh, I actually had tears welling up. The hug was amazing. And yes, I loved it when Pam said they were "soulmates." Sorry that I'm a big softie. The JAM scene in the kitchen at the beginning, where she tries to get him to talk to her dad, was wonderful too. They've got such a great connection.
Along those lines, I thought Jim's "50% of marriages end in divorce" TH wasn't dickish, but instead a way of showing his personality. He always tries to hide horrible situations through humor/sarcasm, but it doesn't work (see a lot of his S2 and a good handful of his S3 THs... "it's not really a date if the girl goes home with her fiance" and "Brangelina is with Frangelina" and stuff like that), and he always realizes it halfway through. In this case, he tries to make the joke, then looks all glum. Aww, Jim.
It was nice to see Pam vulnerable. Clearly I'm a big champion of Super Fancy New Pam, but I do miss her rare moments where I just felt freaking awful for her, though it's good that they're measured out and don't feature in every episode. I got tired of her constant passive moping in S1/2/3 (gasp, not criticism of S2 and S3!!!!).
Dwight trying to get everyone to sign his form, including his desperate attempts to get Phyllis to do so, is a pretty underrated part of this episode in that I've heard no one comment on it at all. It was funny.
I loved Michael's long rambling description of the relaxing meadow and the castle and the pot (!) and whatnot.
"Chocolate." "Racism is dead, Stanley, you can have any kind of ice cream you want!"
"Oscar, can you reach over and touch his thing? That's what he said! Guys, 'cuz of... gay..." I think Paul Lieberstein should just be assigned the task of writing Michael for all eternity. He did an AMAZING job here and in "Goodbye Toby."
"I consider myself a good person. But I'm going to try to make him cry."
The roast was just... oh my God. Andy's song might be the funniest thing EVER on this show and I'm including Prison Mike there (though the latter probably beats it by just a little). I loved Angela's bad "you might be a redneck if..." takeoff, "I don't make burgers where you work and then tell you how to make burgers!", Kelly's list of people she would make out with before Michael (including a candle and Lord Voldemort) and "happy birthday Michael" (bahahahaha), Oscar furiously yelling in Spanish, Toby standing up to roast Michael only to be turned away, Pam being adorable ("If it were an iPod it would be a shuffle!!!"), "You don't have any friends, or any family, or any land," Darryl's roast (the guy had a name tag!), oh, and did I mention I loved Andy's song SOOOO MUCH and Andy in general this episode?
I loved Dwight going on about the icicles and how they may have possibly impaled Michael's brain. Some have said this was a diss of Grey's Anatomy because apparently that happened on GA (!), but I haven't watched that show for years. Either way, hysterical.
Gotta love the entire personnel/personal day conversation with the text message.
Michael randomly throwing bread everywhere and cawing, hahaha. I love this show so much. I like to think he was wearing a black turtleneck because he was in an emo mood.
Andy talking about how he should be a food critic or an art critic was just so... awesome. Ugh, I love him so much in this episode. Emmy now kthnxbi.
OH MY GOD, MICHAEL'S ROAST. My friend and I were walking to dinner tonight and we kept quoting it. I'm missing/paraphrasing a few here, but...
Jim, you are 6'11" and weigh 90 pounds; Gumby has a better body than you.
Meredith, you've slept with so many guys that you're starting to look like one.
Kevin, I can't decide between a fat joke and a dumb one.
Angela... where's Angela? Oh, I can't see her behind that grain of rice.
Stanley, you crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks.
Oscar, you're gay. (the delivery of this one was AMAAAAAZING)
Andy, Cornell called. They think you suck. And you're gayer than Oscar! (please let this be foreshadowing an Andy/Oscar love affair. Apparently in the next episode, Andy falls for someone he shouldn't, and I don't think I can take any more in-office love affairs, UNLESS IT'S THESE TWO. PLEASE GOD PLEASE.)
BOOM, ROASTED. BAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH
I love that everyone in the office was laughing and smiling during that. It was really so sweet. Funny that at least two Stanley-centric episodes (this and "Did I Stutter?"... not so much "Branch Wars") ended up with really wonderful, unexpectedly moving endings.
And because I probably haven't reminded you about its amazingness in a few minutes:
We're stuck listenin' to you all day!
Stanley tried to die just to get away!
