Today, in conversations with my mother.

(We are watching MLBN as is our wont. It's some documentary or something, and Luis Gonzalez comes on to comment on... something)

Me: Boooo hiss!!!!
My mom: Ohhh, I like him.
Me: YOU LIKE HIM?!?!?!
My mom: Yeah, he was Tino's best friend and he was a nice guy and he had triplets and they were really cute! I was happy for him!
Me: WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!?!?! YOU WERE HAPPY FOR HIM?!?!??!
My mom: He was just a nice guy! Can't I be happy for a nice guy?
Me: SERIOUSLY WHAT THE HELL.

(I think she may be schizophrenic though. One time he came on to comment on something and she threw a balled-up piece of paper at him. She burst out crying the instant that crappy flare single hit the ground in 2001 because she may be the only person more irrational than I am. Also, when we were in Boston, she saw one of those "I root for two teams: the Red Sox and whoever beats the Yankees" shirts and was seriously going to buy it until I literally took it out of her hands. Maybe she was drunk? I still love the crazy lady, though.)

unintentionally (???) funny headlines

"Lou Dobbs Bids CNN Adios"

I haven't commented on this yet!

The "TOP MOOOOODELLLLLLLL!!!!!" song they play at the end of every episode of ANTM is freaking hilarious. I like how everyone insults it but that lame-ass "she moves in a different woooorrrrldddd" song from AusNTM is somehow the height of class because it's AusNTM.

so watching the Mets has been highly entertaining this year

That's all.

Like, Luis Castillo won the Gold Glove one year? WHAT.

And the Yankees Triple A is STILL better than the Kansas City Royals. Or at least Kyle Farnsworthless.

OH MY GOD.

This may be the greatest thing I have ever read on the internet and I have read a lot of things on the internet.

lol

this site. Just... this site.

Hahahahahah!

Somehow I missed that London from ANTM C12 - who was super super Christian and constantly talking about God, though not in an obnoxious way - is in Playboy showing off her bewbies and ass! That's pretty hilarious.

Hee!

Funny article.

I love them all, but I am friends with too many "Sympathy-Baters." And I'm almost surely an Obscurist. I was totally a Friend-Padder when I first joined, but so was everyone (this was back in the halcyon days when Facebook was college-only and I think photos had just been introduced).

Which is better?

Glenn Beck Beats from wreckandsalvage on Vimeo.

or



Nah, it's still gotta be...

Primarily because the last one is genuinely the funniest (ask me how many times I say "OHHHH GOOOODDDDD" or "NO! NO, FUCK NO!" in my daily life. It's a disturbingly large amount) but also because Fox News FTL.

HAHAHAHAH

This reminds me of the skit in I think it was United Citizens Brigade where they discuss Meryl Streep and "titular and title lines" of movies, for no real reason other than that they both involve Meryl Streep and are both darn funny.

Hee.

So now HBO keeps playing Mamma Mia! and you know... however bad it is, and it is BAD, whenever I'm in a crappy mood, there's always Pierce Brosnan singing and Colin Firth randomly deciding he's gay (well, the character he played deciding that) to laugh at.

I may have mentioned this on the blog, but Pierce was an interviewee on The Daily Show last summer right before the movie came out and, before the interview, when they showed a clip of him singing "SOS," I genuinely thought the clip was Jon Stewart yelling out mockingly over Pierce's vocals. But... it was not. ETA: Yeah, I did post this before. Oh well.

I lied about that being the last Hangover post.

So when (SPOILER) the Asian thugs let Doug out and I saw him, for a second, I thought it was Idris Elba. And I was like OH SHIT IDRIS ELBA IN A COMEDY NOW THIS EXTREMELY FUNNY MOVIE IS RUINED.

But it was not. HOORAY.

So, The Hangover is still the effin' funniest movie I've seen in like, years. I'd say, other than Borat, it might be the funniest movie of the 2000s. Too bad its title will probably fall to Bruno whenever I see it! ;_;

Guys.

I know I'm like a month late, but The Hangover? OH MY GOD IT IS JUST AS FUNNY AND GENERALLY AMAZING AS YOU HAVE HEARD!!!!

SEE. IT.

In honor of the First 100 Days!

Ewww I accidentally linked to Town Hall sort of. ANYWAY, Obama is awesome!

Australia!

In honor of the AMAZING Australia's Next Top Model starting today or... tomorrow or something like that, oh those wacky Australians, I present: Oh my God, THIS COMMERCIAL (the panel starts at about 1:50)...

OMG THEY ARE ACTUALLY TOTING AROUND BEAVERS THAT'S KIND OF PRESH. Oh and I think it says something about the ridiculous superiority of AusNTM over ANTM that these girls do better on a friggin' tampon commercial involving the words "down there" than any girl in ANTM has like, ever done on a freaking Cover Girl commercial, save, like, Analeigh's F7 commercial.

Yeah I realized I tagged this with "America's Next Top Model" when it's not, deal with it.

IT'S FUCKING DISTRACTING. OHHH GOOD.

I can't stop listening to/laughing at this. Christian Bale has one heavy-ass accent.

He... is just...

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Amazing.
He's so amazing.

When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of Sixth Sense I...

JIZZED IN MY PANTS!

It was totally the first thing that came to mind with this photo. Other than "BOW DOWN, MINIONS!!!!!!"

THE BLAGO TAPES!!!!

So far they seem really boring though, boohoo :(

At least we got this!:

Blagojevich is tysonic.

I believe it. But I also think we need a whole new adjective for this guy... Blagonic?