Dresses at the Golden Globes.

Here's a gallery.

Eva Longoria: Beautiful, but honestly a little prom-my. The scalloping on the bustline was a smart, creative choice though. I like that she wore red, because red is awesome.

Olivia Wilde: Actually one of my favorites of the night. At least she kept it interesting and the weird bottom didn't look bad.

Kate Flannery: This was pretty cute, actually.

Julie Benz: Again, kind of prom-my. The color is nice.

Angela Kinsey: Love the color, nice cut, but it's a little boring.

Jennifer Morrison: Love the color. Honestly, I was just so glad to see someone with color and a dress that wasn't cut straight across the boobs, then fell straight down in a neutralish color.

Madeline Zima: Who? I like her dress.

Jane Fallon: It's very cute, but I don't exactly think it's formal enough for the Globes.

Mindy Kaling: For all the talk about fashion she likes to do in her blog, Mindy wears really bad outfits to awards shows. This dress is an exception, thank GOD. It is boring, but better boring and flattering than... awful.

Amy Adams: One of my favorites. It's a strapless black dress, but thank God it's not at all boring. Her jewelry and hair were great as well.

Anna Paquin: It's boring and unflattering. She needs to go back to dark hair, close that gap in her teeth, and get better eyebrows.

Christina Applegate: Cute. I love the detailing on the bodice.

Debra Messing: This would have been fine without the, uh, what do you call them? layers or something? on the bottom. I like it a lot besides that.

Jenna Fischer: Like I said, it had a lovely cut that, thankfully, was different from the standard strapless-straight-down-no-waist. But, the cut is ruined by that pattern. Ugh :(

Evan Rachel Wood: I actually loved this. I will always love black dresses that are actually interesting. The tiering, the glitter, loved it.

Kristin Scott Thomas: zzzz. The black belt and the white flower thing don't go well on the dress either.

Rachel Griffiths: Oh, Rachel, no :( It's such a pretty color and the cut could have been good, but it's so shapeless and, more importantly, SO WRINKLED! Ugh.

Rumor Willis: I LOVED this dress. She looked so glamorous and beautiful. Points off for clashing with her hair, though.

Susan Sarandon: How is she so hot at 62 or whatever? And in a pantsuit?

Jennifer Lopez: Tacky and unflattering.

Jane Krakowski: It's hard to wear white, but she pulls it off quite marvelously. I like the hints of Grecian influence.

Amanda Seyfried: I agree with these TV Guide comments too much... yeah, this washed her out and it was just BORING. C'mon, Amanda, like five people wore this to my prom.

Aaron Eckhart: He looks too harsh and even old with his hair slicked back like that.

America Ferrera: It's not A+ like some of her other dresses have been, but I love it anyway. It's probably what I would wear to like, all these things, if I could ever go ha ha. The cut is so cute, though the color is a little boring.

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie: Brad looks better without facial hair, but whatever, he's Brad Pitt, he looks SO HOT doing whatever. I really liked Angelina's dress, actually, but it was just a little bit... blah? I dunno.

Anne Hathaway: Good color, but the fabric should have been the same all the way down (or all the way up, depending on how you want to look at it). It wasn't flattering across her stomach. Also, she looks MUCH prettier when her makeup is either less severe (Anne, can you try a PINK lip just ONCE?) or, preferrably, her hair is loose.

Cameron Diaz: GORGEOUS, GORGEOUS color, but oh God what a mess overall. It looks like she spent three hours rolling around on the floor of her limo.

Drew Barrymore: Beautiful color, but from the hair to the faux sleeves, it's very matronly.

Eva Mendes: The dress looks beautiful on her skin, but I hate the bow, which, during the show, just looked like random fabric billowing out from a random spot on her hip.

Ashton Kutcher & Demi Moore: I don't like the all-black look, but okay. I don't like all the ruffles on Demi's dress and the color is boring, but she looked incredibly beautiful.

Hayden Panettiere: It's a beautiful color and I think it fits wonderfully, actually. But it's very boring. It's the epitome of the whole cut-straight-across-the-boobs-then-fall-straight-down dress I've been bitching about.

Isla Fisher: A MESS.

Glenn Close and Tony Shalhoub: No. Glenn maybe could have turned the top into a dress, but the pants are simply terrible.

Blake Lively: It's a beautiful dress, but it's soooo unflattering.

Brendan Gleeson and Colin Farrell: Brendan looks good, actually! Colin looks... messy.

Laurence Fishburne and Gina Torres: Not surprisingly, I didn't see these two before, but I really like her dress (it would be 10000% there without those random drooping fabric pieces below the belt). Great color, great cut, quite interesting, just great. I like that he went for a different color and pulled it off well.

Laura Linney: Flawless. Incredibly beautiful and interesting without being weird.

Kevin Bacon & Kyra Sedgwick: He looks fine, but his hair is weird. I like her dress, but the belt is kinda meh.

Kate Winslet & Leonardo DiCaprio: Leo looked glorious. Kate, I worship you, but this outfit was sadly boring. Flawless hair and makeup, though.

Seal & Heidi Klum: Oh, Heidi. If this is what you think is all couture and whatnot, I will no longer trust your opinion on Project Runway. Without the flower, though, I think I'd love it.

Lisa Edelstein: I'd like it so much without the giant WHAT THE HELL? black bow.

Maggie Gyllenhaal: LOVED IT SO MUCH. Gorgeous and totally interesting.

Marisa Tomei: Uh, well, it's crazy, and I'm not pretending it's good, but she's kind of pulling it off, right? She looks so cute!

Patrick Dempsey & Tina Fey: What a random pair. Patrick looked suave and Tina's dress was cute, but dammit, Tina, wear something that's not navy or black. Come on, you're hot, you can do it!

Mary Louise Parker: Damn, that color looks amazing on her. I'd like it better without the crosshatching, but it's still a wonderful dress.

Penelope Cruz: BORING. LIKE THE ACTRESS! Oh, SNAP!

Renee Zellweger: Like the write-up says, where to begin? Sweet Jesus this is all kinds of terrible in so many ways. Poor Renee. She used to look so freaking amazing at awards shows!

Miley Cyrus: It's cute and age-appropriate. She's VERY VERY ANNOYING.

Salma Hayek: The color is actually quite good on her, though it would be boring on anyone else. Yeah, she's working the dress. Her body is fucking flawless, so of course she is.

Kevin Dillon & Mickey Rourke: Kevin's fine. Mickey is, uh, a mess.

Megan Fox: The pattern is rather ugly and her face looks absolutely frozen.

Sandra Bullock: The layer things on the bottom are reminiscent of Debra Messing's, but Sandra's are much better. Maybe because the layers are on the top too? I like this dress a lot, it's very soft and pretty.

Sigourney Weaver: Boring and quite matronly.

Taraji P. Henson: She's adorable and the cut is flawless, but the pattern is such an awful mess.

Tom Hanks & Rita Wilson: Love him. His wife needs to not wear disco ball dresses with strange mermaid scales, though she kind of looks good in it.

January Jones: I actually kind of like it? It's a little much, and it wasn't one of the best of the night, but, yeah, I actually liked it.

Christina Hendricks: Yes, you're pale and red-haired and have big boobs, we get it. This dress is boring.

Best Dressed:
1. Tom Cruise! I know I didn't cover him here, but holy crap, he looked AMAZING! He actually took my breath away with how good he looked. And this is TOM CRUISE we're talking about here!
2. Maggie Gyllenhaal
3. Amy Adams
4. Laura Linney
5. Evan Rachel Wood
6. Mary Louise Parker
7. Beyonce (she wasn't on this list but it was beautiful)
8. Sandra Bullock
9. Olivia Wilde
10. Rumor Willis

oh, and hey detractors of the aforementioned goddess!

Yes, I'm well aware her winning two Golden Globes doesn't mean she's going to win two Oscars. Hell, I'm still nervous that she's not going to win either. However, y'all should really stop pretending that, if Hathaway and Cruz won in Lead and Supporting, like most were predicting (including myself!), you all wouldn't be saying "HAH!!! KATE WINSLET HAS NO CHANCE AT THE OSCAR NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

In case you missed it, Goddess Kate.

4:00 to about 4:33 is love. Leo's little air kiss to Kate is the cutest, sweetest thing. I secretly real-people-ship them in my head more than I ship John/Jenna!

The Curious Case of Pamela Beesly.

oh my God, she's acting kind of smug. LET'S CRUCIFY HER!!!!

So, if you can remember from a few posts ago, I'm not so much a fan of all the wank in the online Office community, especially when it comes to poor Pam. Yeah, I know it's rampant in every community, but the community of The Office is by far the one I'm most familiar with. So, here's my attempt to explain the way I feel about Pam Beesly this season and other seasons, and why I understand people defending her so passionately, and why I doubt the anti-S5ers are ever really going to convince me, especially since their entire response to S5 seems to be "it sucks because it's not S2." Seriously, I've seen Pam be attacked for saying "So suck it" in (I think) "The Surplus"... do people not REALIZE that was a call-back to "The Fire," where everyone freaked out when she first used it?!

First, a really big confession, and one that's really unpopular in Officeland: In S1, S2, and S3, I did not love Pam Beesly. Jenna played her really well, and of course I felt terribly sympathetic for her at times, but I was simply so frustrated at the way she treated Jim in S1 & S2 and the way she seemed stuck in a relationship that was clearly awful for her about 90% of the time. The way she was so passive and downright mopey and pathetic in S3 (up until "Beach Games") annoyed me. Like, honestly, when people crow about how great it was that Pam went back to get the beer she wanted in "Cocktails," that honestly doesn't do much to show me that they don't just want her to be a wallflower with horrible hair forever, because that's the way it was in S2.

I only got into The Office during the writers' strike, but I watched from the beginning until what they were up to in mid-S4 without reading any spoilers, and I was SHOCKED that it was Pam that broke things off with Roy. To me, that seemed more out-of-character than anything else she's done (except for a horrible deleted scene, my least favorite from the series actually, from "The Deposition" where she yells at Jim at his desk). I honestly thought S3 was going to be, I dunno, Pam would push off the wedding again, and Roy would get continually angrier at her, while Jim stayed at Scranton and subtly tried to win her over. Again, I didn't read any spoilers, so obviously I was horribly wrong, but whatever.

Pam changed in S4 and S5 (though not to the point where you can't recognize her, and I honestly think if she hadn't changed her hair and sort of her clothes, people wouldn't be so hostile). There's absolutely no doubt about it. But the thing with most of the community is that they seem to think change is BAD!!!! because it makes things NOT LIKE S2!!!!! The thing is, and here's sort of my thesis here, Pam made an effort to change. She got out of her shitty and emotionally-damaging relationship, made her own life, made an effort to get better at something she loves, got a great new boyfriend directly because of the positive changes she made. The show never seemed to look down on the way she was beforehand, though it did, understandably, look down on the fact that she was with a man who was clearly no good for her at all.

Pam's changes mirror changes of anyone who genuinely changed their life for the better, by dumping something that was badly holding them back and just... going out for something that, again, was better. Even if Pam wasn't with Jim now, she would be better just for gaining confdence. I think she's also been affected by the way her boyfriends have treated her; Roy treated her like crap, so she acted like a woman who deserved that, and Jim treats her like a princess, so she acts like a woman who deserves that.

Ugh. As ever, when I try to explain my point-of-view, it's not so articulate. Basically, though, it's unfair to criticize Pam for changing. Of course she changed; she made herself change. It's just like when people quit jobs they hate, or stand up to frenemies who make them feel badly about themselves. But to me, she's still the same person underneath that she always was: kind if somewhat snarky and possessing a rather dry sense of humor, and above all, capable of immense love and sympathy. Almost all of us will change during our lives, but we'll also all be remarkably similar to the people we were originally.

And that's that, however inarticulately expressed.

More thoughts, before I go to sleep.

Mickey Rourke and Colin Farrell are just messes. Though, Mickey Rourke's speech was quite beautiful and heartfelt. He really helped his chances for winning the Oscar tonight with that speech, while Sean Penn apparently couldn't be bothered to show up.

Speaking of Sean Penn not showing up, like, why was no one there? Javier Bardem, James Franco, Mariska Hargitay, Judi Dench, Kevin Spacey, you guys have anything better to do? Javier, your girlfriend was there...

Dustin Hoffman's really going senile. And RDJ looked like he did during the rehab years to be honest. :( He wasn't acting like it, but DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR HAIR! A lot of the guys had hair issues. Aaron Eckhart looks old and hard with his hair slicked back so harshly. Jeremy Piven, what happened to your "mercury poisoning"? (He was so great in Speed-the-Plow, and I feel bad for the people that had tickets that he left early. He was fantastic and as many people as possible deserved to see him.)

Kate and Leo are secretly in love. And, after tonight, maybe that's not so secret! Hah. "LEO I LOVE YOU I'VE LOVED YOU FOR TWELVE YEARS AND MY KIDS ARE YOURS ACTUALLY BUT DON'T TELL ANYONE. Oh hi Sam, thanks for directing the movie"

Can someone accept an award this year without having a mental breakdown about it? maybe heath ledger I'M SORRY FOR THAT, GUYS

Everyone was so far away from the stage.

At the tremendous applause for Meryl Streep when they introduced her for Best Actress in a Musical/Comedy, I was like OH MY GOD IS SHE GOING TO WIN IN THIS CATEGORY I THINK I'M GONNA VOM but thank God she didn't. Yay, Mamma Mia! going home empty-handed!

Spielberg was classy as all hell and not boring when those speeches usually are. I'm sure everyone's bitching about him because OMG how dare he be successful, his films aren't all cold and actually show emotion and make people cry. Scorsese did a great intro.

Rainn Wilson is hilarious. Ricky Gervais is funny but dude, it's not your stand-up comedy hour. Also, I called the joke you made to Kate! Sacha Baron Cohen will never be invited back to the Golden Globes.

My favorite speeches? Kate's second (!!), Tracy Morgan for 30 Rock, Mickey Rourke, Tina Fey calling out people on the internet LMAO!

Everyone's dresses were so boring. Nobody looked atrocious except Renee Zellweger and maybe Rachel Griffiths. Marisa Tomei's dress thing was pretty bad too, but she kind of pulled it off. Jenna Fischer's dress fit beautifully but looked like window curtains. Eva Mendes had some weird growth on the side of her dress. J.Lo looked cheap. Kate's was boring. I honestly think I might have liked Laura Linney's the best! I liked Maggie Gyllenhaal's too. Oh, and Beyonce's! I'm starting to think that Jesus Amy Adams is genuinely the prettiest woman in Hollywood. She's STUNNING in a way that's very relatable. Goddess Amy!

"I can't say I was robbed for anything until Kate Winslet wins an Oscar." -Rachel Griffiths on E! If what happened to Kate tonight happens at the Oscars, though it's very doubtful, that would be SO FUCKING AWESOME.

What a great Globes ceremony.

Goddess Kate TIMES TWO!, Goddess Laura, BRUCE!

Anne Hathaway LOST! despite that spoiler!

So awesome!

Globe predix.

Did I already do this? Yeah, well.

Picture - Drama: Slumdog Millionaire
Alt: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Slumdog is gaining hype, and Benjamin Button is kind of losing it/gaining backlash that I haven't seen for Slumdog.

Picture - Musical/Comedy: Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Alt: Happy-Go-Lucky
It's hard to tell, because the Globes are nucking futs and love both weird foreign films and musicals, so this could go to Mamma Mia!, but Mamma Mia! is just so... shitty. C'mon, Globes. Do not let me down.

Director: Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire
Alt: David Fincher, The Curious Case...
I would predict Fincher to win the Globe/Oscar, except I keep hearing Fincher is a huuuumongous asshole that nobody wants to vote for. Yeah, that shouldn't play a part in award shows, but it unfortunately does. Damn politics. Whether it's true or not, we'll see.

Best Actor - Drama: Sean Penn, Milk
Alt: Mickey Rourke, The Wrestler
I think Penn's gonna get the Oscar this year, and he's the clear frontrunner. So, cuz he's gonna win the award this year... can we please give his 2003 Oscar to Bill Murray? Not that Sean Penn was bad there, but come on. :( DiCaprio and Pitt are also major possibilities, because the Globes love starfucking.

Best Actress - Drama: Anne Hathaway, Rachel Getting Married
Alt: Kate Winslet, Revolutionary Road
I'm gonna go with that "spoiler" and pray desperately that it's wrong. Also, if Anne wins and Kate goes 0-2, which may happen, that's right, Anne Hathaway's going to be a Golden Globe winner before Kate is. Come on, Golden Globe voters. You know that shit is fucked up.

Best Actor - Musical/Comedy: Dustin Hoffman, Last Chance Harvey
Alt: Javier Bardem, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Eh, no guts no glory, I can see them going for the legend here, plus they just gave an award to Javier last year (though maybe they'll reward him again this year so he can give his speech? LOL). They're both kind of tied in my mind.

Best Actress - Musical/Comedy: Sally Hawkins, Happy-Go-Lucky
Alt: Meryl Streep, Mamma Mia!
The Globes are the type to LOVE Hawkins. On the other hand, they're obsessed with Meryl Streep. But I don't think they're stupid enough to award her the win for Mamma Mia!. Or rather, I HOPE so.

Best Supporting Actor: Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight
Alt: I don't need one. But Philip Seymour Hoffman, Doubt
Duh. Duh duh duh? Duh duh.

Best Supporting Actress: Penelope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Alt: Kate Winslet, The Reader
The Globes ARE the type to go all "OMG Penelope! She was FIERY!!! And spoke SPANISH!!!!" Am I the only one who seriously didn't like her all that much? Yeah, she was good, but no better than Rebecca or Scarlett. Poor Scarlett Johansson has gone from like the most overrated, overworking actress in Hollywood, to its most underrated. Yes, I will always defend her tooth and nail.

Best Screenplay: Slumdog Millionaire
Alt: Doubt
Sure.


At least this is gonna be better than last year's NOTceremony. Pretty dresses!!!!

GRRR.

I said stop the stupid Bride Wars commercials, not PLAY THREE OF THEM IN A ROW. LITERALLY.

Oh, and then there was another commercial for some local shit, AND THEN ANOTHER ONE GODDAMN IT THIS MOVIE. I hope it flops miserably.

Such a dork.

LOVE

Oh my God, Bride Wars.

STOP FUCKING ADVERTISING. If I have to see Anne Hathaway's stupid chipmunk face and hear her horribly stilted delivery of "your wedding will be huge, just like your ass at prom" one more time, I am going to throw a tissue at the screen. Violently!

I hope Clint Eastwood kicks that movie's ass.

My dad, sayin' dumb stuff.

I love my parents. But they are crazy. Today I was talking to my dad (online) and the conversation basically went like this:

Me: Neil Patrick Harris is hosting Saturday Night Live tonight!!! YAY!!!!
Dad: He is a has-been.
Me: WHAT.
Dad: Yes. He is gay. So now he will never play a straight character again.
Me: ... He's kind of a manwhore on How I Met Your Mother.
Dad: But it's not believable.
Me: Do you even watch the show?
Dad: No. But he is not able to accurately convince people that he is attracted to women, because he's really attracted to men.
Me: Oookay. Well, he gets tons of critical praise and award nominations (unfortunately, he doesn't have too many awards because of Jeremy Piven LOL) for his role.
Dad: Right. But he's still not convincing to the public and he will still never be a romantic hero. Because he is gay.
Me: ... Jake Gyllenhaal, Heath Ledger, Sean Penn, and James Franco aren't gay, but does that mean they're not convincing in Brokeback Mountain and Milk?
Dad: They didn't show affection or physical attraction in either of those movies. *
Me: ............... (tent. scene.)

* He didn't see Milk. He saw Brokeback Mountain and plays the soundtrack like, a lot. Keep in mind, I'm pretty sure my dad's not homophobic.

I finally saw Sex and the City: The Movie.

It was, you know, fine. Couldn't really compare with the better episodes of the series. Not painful at all, though; it went by so quickly, and didn't feel, at all, like it had a two-and-a-half-hour running time. B- or so.

The film got much better as it went along. At the beginning, Carrie was just so freaking bratty to the point that she was extraordinarily out-of-character. Yes, I know Carrie's a pretty bratty character, but in the show, her brattiness was always in-character, if that made sense. It was organic. In the movie, it wasn't so much. Also, the Big/Carrie breakup scene after he called off the wedding was laughably written and acted. The parts in Mexico were strange. I'm not exactly sure what the point of the Miranda and Carrie fight was, as it was resolved in .0002 seconds.

I found Samantha incredibly obnoxious too, but like Carrie's brattiness in the show, it was in-character. I hope Smith comes back. He visibly aged, but was still like 30 times hotter than greasy Dante (minus that shower scene.........).

Loved the clothes and set decoration and whatnot, of course.

I liked Louise, despite her lack of personality. Jennifer Hudson was adorable.

I guess Stanford and Anthony don't hate each other any more? That came out of nowhere.

Charlotte's kids' names are Lily and Rose? WORST. JEW. NAMES. EVER. On the other hand, John James Preston sounds like one of Britney Spears' kids.

The film did have a lot of really great scenes. I cried when Steve and Miranda met each other on the bridge (I always did root for those two crazy kids) and during the New Year's Eve montage. God, the latter scene was gorgeous. Just a whole bunch of punches in the stomach, really.

THE SEQUEL NEEDS MORE HARRY. MOOOOORE. It should just be called Sex and the City: Why Harry Is the Awesomest Character Ever.

Oscar nominee predix, 1/10.

Best Picture
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
The Dark Knight
Doubt
Frost/Nixon
Slumdog Millionaire
Next in line in order: Milk, Wall-E, Revolutionary Road

Best Director
Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire
David Fincher, The Curious Case...
Ron Howard, Frost/Nixon
Christopher Nolan, The Dark Knight
Gus Van Sant, Milk
Next in line: Aronofsky, Mendes

Best Actor
Clint Eastwood, Gran Torino
Frank Langella, Frost/Nixon
Sean Penn, Milk
Brad Pitt, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Mickey Rourke, The Wrestler
Next in line: DiCaprio, Jenkins, Brolin, Bardem, Gleeson, Farrell (try not to laugh too hard about the last two)

Best Actress
Cate Blanchett, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button *
Anne Hathaway, Rachel Getting Married
Angelina Jolie, Changeling
Meryl Streep, Doubt
Kate Winslet, Revolutionary Road
Next in line: Hawkins, Leo, Scott-Thomas
* Yes, I know Blanchett has little precursor attention. But it's the Oscars. And Benjamin Button will likely gain a gazillion nominations. Are you really gonna tell me they're not going to nominate Cate fucking Blanchett from a major Oscarbait movie? Really? Oh, but they'll nominate Melissa Leo in some movie 4 people saw over her. Uh huh. (This will probably happen, and then you can laugh at me)

Best Supporting Actor
Josh Brolin, Milk
Robert Downey Jr., Tropic Thunder
Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight
Dev Patel, Slumdog Millionaire
Philip Seymour Hoffman, Doubt
Next in line: Franco, Shannon

Best Supporting Actress
Amy Adams, Doubt
Penelope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Viola Davis, Doubt
Marisa Tomei, The Wrestler
Kate Winslet, The Reader
Next in line: Henson and that's about it? One of the Rachel Getting Married ladies?

Best Original Screenplay
Milk, Vicky Cristina Barcelona, Wall-E, Rachel Getting Married, In Bruges
Next in line: Happy-Go-Lucky, The Wrestler, Gran Torino

Best Adapted Screenplay
Slumdog Millionaire, Doubt, Frost/Nixon, The Reader, The Curious Case...
Next in line: Revolutionary Road, The Dark Knight

you know, I'm not such a fan of the online Office community.

Lots of people: OMG this season sucks.
Minor number of people: Why?
Lots of people: OMG it's not PERFECT S2. Remember how PERFECT "Valentine's Day" and "Dwight's Speech" were? And the humor of "The Injury," OMG, so subtle.
Minor number of people: ...really?
Lots of people: OMG STOP OPPRESSING US! Also, Karen is a fucking cunt and Roy is a great guy how dare you suggest he wasn't good for Pam. Also also, Pam is a bitch now, though she was FLAWLESS!!!! in S2.
Minor number of people: Why?
Lots of people: Because she has pretty hair now. And she mock-threatened to withhold sex from Jim and wrote a note about the microwave. She treated Jim fine and really needed to grow a backbone in S2. But because it's S5 now, it's not okay!!!!!!

I really, really feel like I could sympathize with the "lots of people" group if one of them would stop whining about how oppressed they are by the other people and just explain their point of view in a way that actually makes sense and isn't just them feeling all pissy that their precious show isn't S2 any more.

also,

Lesbians should really host every TV show. Ellen and Rachel Maddow (LOVE!) are seriously the best at what they do.

Though, Ellen should never host the Oscars again. Sorry Ellen.

Clint Eastwood is wearing a pink polo shirt on Ellen.

Really? Like, really? How non-Clint-Eastwood.

He does look good for approximately 503, though.

Why? Cuz I felt like it.

LMAO...

I just realized that if Kate wins for The Reader, her win will be unintentionally sort of like this scene in Extras! Okay, she's certainly not a nun in The Reader, but it IS a Holocaust film.

She should win for that reason alone. Seriously. Oh, and for Revolutionary Road. Yeah.

GROOOOCE.

I'm hoping this was just a typo or something, though it's probably not.

Fuck, is this bitch gonna win the Oscar the first time she gives a halfway decent performance? If I'm Scarlett Johansson (Lost in Translation), Natalie Portman (Cold Mountain), Sarah Polley (The Sweet Hereafter), or Christina Ricci (Buffalo '66), I am spending Oscar night getting very, very, very drunk and throwing shit at the television every time I see that cartoonish face of hers.

Angelina Jolie!

You have Brad Pitt.

Can you smile? Or stop glowering for .0002 seconds?

LOL.

So, they had a Best Actress tie. Meryl Streep and Anne Hathaway. LOL TALK ABOUT BOTH ENDS OF THE SPECTRUM.

(Anne is making her speech now. And... it's kind of uncomfortable because she's like having a mental breakdown about her dad teaching her about good men or something)

Amy Adams, you are Jesus,

but your dress at this award show is from the goddamn prom.

so I'm watching the Critics' Choice Awards.

Okay, so everyone knows how the award shows go where they announce a category nominee by nominee, and there's mild clapping for everyone. They get to Best Supporting Actor and:

1. (nominee)
(mild applause)

2. (nominee)
(mild applause)

3. (nominee)
(mild applause)

4. (nominee)
(mild applause)

5. (nominee)
(mild applause)

6. Heath Ledger in The Dark Knight
(THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE THAT BLOWS THE FUCKIN' ROOF OFF THE PLACE!!!!!!!!!!)

I do memes cuz I'm lame.

The top 100 songs from the year I graduated high school. Italics for songs I like, strikethroughs for songs I didn't, bold for favorites. Nothing for the ones I go "meh?" about.

1. We Belong Together, Mariah Carey
2. Since U Been Gone, Kelly Clarkson
3. Because Of You, Kelly Clarkson
4. Behind These Hazel Eyes, Kelly Clarkson (Kelly Clarkson was rather popular)
5. You And Me, Lifehouse
6. Don't Cha, Pussycat Dolls featuring Busta Rhymes
7. Boulevard Of Broken Dreams, Green Day
8. Pon De Replay, Rihanna
9. Karma, Alicia Keys
10. Run It, Chris Brown
11. Let Me Love You, Mario
12. Hollaback Girl, Gwen Stefani
13. Beverly Hills, Weezer
14. Don't Phunk With My Heart, Black Eyed Peas
15. Shake It Off, Mariah Carey
16. Don't Forget About Us, Mariah Carey
17. 1, 2 Step, Ciara featuring Missy Elliott
18. Photograph, Nickelback
19. Caught Up, Usher
20. Gold Digger, Kanye West
21. Let Me Go, 3 Doors Down
22. Obsession (No Es Amor), Frankie J featuring Baby Bash
23. Switch, Will Smith
24. Listen To Your Heart, D.H.T.
25. My Humps, Black Eyed Peas
26. Rich Girl, Gwen Stefani featuring Eve
27. Lose Control, Missy Elliott
28. Lonely No More, Rob Thomas
29. Scars, Papa Roach
30. Beautiful Soul, Jesse McCartney
31. Feel Good Inc., Gorillaz
32. Baby I'm Back, Baby Bash
33. Don't Lie, Black Eyed Peas
34. Soldier, Destiny's Child
35. These Words, Natasha Bedingfield
36. Get It Poppin', Fat Joe featuring Nelly
37. Belly Dancer (Bananza), Akon
38. Holiday, Green Day
39. Wake Me Up When September Ends, Green Day
40. Oh, Ciara featuring Ludacris
41. Mr. Brightside, The Killers
42. Chariot, Gavin DeGraw
43. Sugar, We're Goin' Down, Fall Out Boy (One time I was at a party and they played this song FIFTEEN TIMES IN A ROW AAARRRRGH HEAD GO SPLODE)
44. Luxurious, Gwen Stefani
45. Nobody's Home, Avril Lavigne
46. Incomplete, Backstreet Boys
47. True, Ryan Cabrera
48. Collide, Howie Day
49. Sunday Morning, Maroon 5
50. Mockingbird, Eminem
51. Cool, Gwen Stefani
52. Disco Inferno, 50 Cent
53. How To Deal, Frankie J
54. Lovers & Friends, Lil Jon featuring Usher & Ludacris
55. We Be Burnin', Sean Paul
56. Untitled (How Can This HappenTo Me?), Simple Plan
57. Like You, Bow Wow featuring Ciara
58. Your Body, Pretty Ricky
59. Lonely, Akon
60. Sugar (Gimme Some), Trick Daddy
61. Candy Shop, 50 Cent
62. Almost, Bowling For Soup
63. Hate It Or Love It, The Game & 50 Cent
64. Just A Lil' Bit, 50 Cent
65. Let Me Hold You, Bow Wow featuring Omarion
66. Just The Girl, Click Five
67. Grind With Me, Pretty Ricky
68. Numb/Encore, Jay-Z & Linkin Park
69. Cold, Crossfade
70. How We Do, The Game featuring 50 Cent
71. Speed Of Sound, Coldplay
72. Outta Contro,l 50 Cent featuring Mobb Deep
73. Hung Up, Madonna
74. Cater 2 U, Destiny's Child
75. When I'm Gone, Eminem
76. Goin' Crazy, Natalie
77. Wonderful, Ja Rule featuring Ashanti & R. Kelly
78. I Just Wanna Live, Good Charlotte
79. It's Like That, Mariah Carey
80. Only U, Ashanti
81. Girl, Destiny's Child
82. Pimpin' All Over The World, Ludacris
83. Hold You Down, Jennifer Lopez featuring Fat Joe
84. Soul Survivor, Young Jeezy featuring Akon
85. If You Were Mine, Marcos Hernandez
86. Look What You've Done, Jet (the video also freaks me out)
87. Don't Bother, Shakira
88. Signs, Snoop Dogg featuring Charlie Wilson & Justin Timberlake
89. Fall To Pieces, Avril Lavigne
90. Boyfriend, Ashlee Simpson
91. More Than Words, Frankie J
92. N Dey Say, Nelly
93. Here By Me, 3 Doors Down
94. Somewhere Only We Know, Keane
95. Follow Through, Gavin DeGraw
96. Encore, Eminem featuring Dr. Dre & 50 Cent
97. Shine On, Ryan Cabrera
98. Get Right, Jennifer Lopez
99. Here We Go, Trina featuring Kelly Rowland
100. Like Toy Soldiers, Eminem

And, why not. College years. First, 2006:

1. Bad Day, Daniel Powter
2. Temperature, Sean Paul
3. Promiscuous, Nelly Furtado Featuring Timbaland
4. You're Beautiful, James Blunt
5. Hips Don't Lie, Shakira Featuring Wyclef Jean
6. Unwritten, Natasha Bedingfield
7. Crazy, Gnarls Barkley
8. Ridin', Chamillionaire Featuring Krayzie Bone
9. Sexyback, Justin Timberlake
10. Check on It, Beyonce Featuring Slim Thug
11. Be without You, Mary J. Blige
12. Grillz, Nelly Featuring Paul Wall, Ali & Gipp
13. Over My Head (Cable Car), The Fray
14. Me & U, Cassie
15. Buttons, The Pussycat Dolls Featuring Snoop Dogg
16. Run It!, Chris Brown
17. So Sick, Ne-Yo
18. It's Goin' Down, Yung Joc
19. SOS, Rihanna
20. I Write Sins not Tragedies, Panic! At The Disco
21. Move Along, The All-American Rejects
22. London Bridge, Fergie
23. Dani California, Red Hot Chili Peppers
24. Snap Yo Fingers, Lil Jon Featuring E-40 & Sean Paul Of The YoungBloodZ
25. Lean Wit It, Rock wit It, Dem Franchize Boyz Featuring Lil Peanut & Charlay
26. What Hurts the Most, Rascal Flatts
27. How to Save a Life, The Fray
28. Unfaithful, Rihanna
29. Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol
30. Lips of an Angel, Hinder
31. Everytime We Touch, Cascada (I have a love/hate relationship with this song)
32. Ain't no Other Man, Christina Aguilera
33. Dance, Dance, Fall Out Boy
34. Gold Digger, Kanye West Featuring Jamie Foxx
35. Money Maker, Ludacris Featuring Pharrell
36. Ms. New Booty, Bubba Sparxxx Featuring Ying Yang Twins & Mr. ColliPark
37. (When You Gonna) Give It Up To Me, Sean Paul Featuring Keyshia Cole
38. Photograph, Nickelback
39. Because of You, Kelly Clarkson
40. Stickwitu, The Pussycat Dolls
41. I'n N Luv (Wit a Stripper), T-Pain Featuring Mike Jones
42. My Humps, The Black Eyed Peas
43. Where'd You Go, Fort Minor Featuring Holly Brook
44. Yo (Excuse Me Miss), Chris Brown
45. Walk Away, Kelly Clarkson
46. Laffy Taffy, D4L
47. What you Know, T.I.
48. Dirty Little Secret, The All-American Rejects
49. Savin' Me, Nickelback (I've never actually heard this, but because it's Nickelback I'm sure it's awful.)
50. Don't Forget About Us, Mariah Carey
51. Sexy Love, Ne-Yo
52. U and Dat, E-40 Featuring T-Pain & Kandi Girl
53. Far Away, Nickelback (see #49)
54. What's Left of Me, Nick Lachey
55. So What, Field Mob Featuring Ciara
56. Do it to It, Cherish Featuring Sean Paul Of The YoungBloodZ
57. Black Horse & the Cherry Tree, KT Tunstall
58. There it Go! (The Whistle Song), Juelz Santana
59. Shoulder Lean!, Young Dro Featuring T.I.
60. Unpredictable, Jamie Foxx Featuring Ludacris
61. My Love, Justin Timberlake Featuring T.I.
62. Shake That, Eminem Featuring Nate Dogg
63. Pullin' Me Back, Chingy Featuring Tyrese
64. Bossy, Kelis Featuring Too $hort
65. Chain Hang Low, Jibbs
66. Smack That, Akon Featuring Eminem
67. One Wish, Ray J
68. Sugar We're Goin' Down, Fall Out Boy
69. Gimme That, Chris Brown Featuring Lil' Wayne
70. I Know You See It, Yung Joc Featuring Brandy 'Ms. B.' Hambrick
71. Who Says You Can't Go Home, Bon Jovi
72. Too Little Too Late, JoJo
73. Touch It, Busta Rhymes
74. Rompe, Daddy Yankee
75. Deja Vu, Beyonce Featuring Jay-Z
76. Life is a Highway, Rascal Flatts
77. Call me When You're Sober, Evanescence
78. Jesus, take the Wheel, Carrie Underwood
79. Show Stopper, Danity Kane
80. Get Up, Ciara Featuring Chamillionaire
81. We be Burnin', Sean Paul
82. Hate Me, Blue October
83. You and Me, Lifehouse
84. Beep, The Pussycat Dolls Featuring will.i.am
85. I Think They Like Me, Dem Franchize Boyz Featuring Jermaine Dupri, Da Brat & Bow Wow
86. Say Goodbye, Chris Brown
87. Waiting on the World to Change, John Mayer
88. Soul Survivor, Young Jeezy Featuring Akon
89. Pump It, The Black Eyed Peas
90. When I'm Gone, Eminem
91. Hung Up, Madonna
92. Stay Fly, Three 6 Mafia Featuring Young Buck & Eightball & MJG
93. Love, Keyshia Cole
94. When You're Mad, Ne-Yo
95. Why You Wanna, T.I.
96. Stupid Girls, Pink
97. Feel Good Inc, Gorillaz
98. I'm Sprung, T-Pain
99. Do I Make you Proud, Taylor Hicks
100. For you I Will (Condience), Teddy Geiger

2007:
1. Irreplaceable, Beyonce
2. Umbrella, Rihanna Featuring Jay-Z
3. The Sweet Escape, Gwen Stefani Featuring Akon
4. Big Girls Don't Cry, Fergie
5. Buy U A Drank (Shawty Snappin'), T-Pain Featuring Yung Joc
6. Before He Cheats, Carrie Underwood
7. Hey There Delilah, Plain White T's
8. I Wanna Love You, Akon Featuring Snoop Dogg
9. Say It Right, Nelly Furtado
10. Glamorous, Fergie Featuring Ludacris
11. Don't Matter, Akon
12. Girlfriend, Avril Lavigne (YES, I LIKE THIS, OKAY?)
13. Makes Me Wonder, Maroon 5
14. Party Like A Rockstar, Shop Boyz
15. Smack That, Akon Featuring Eminem
16. This Is Why I'm Hot, Mims
17. It's Not Over, Daughtry
18. The Way I Are, Timbaland Featuring Keri Hilson
19. Fergalicious, Fergie
20. Crank That (Soulja Boy), Soulja Boy Tell'em
21. Give It To Me, Timbaland Featuring Nelly Furtado & Justin Timberlake
22. What Goes Around...Comes Around, Justin Timberlake
23. Cupid's Chokehold/Breakfast In America, Gym Class Heroes Featuring Patrick Stump
24. How To Save A Life, The Fray
25. Home, Daughtry
26. My Love, Justin Timberlake Featuring T.I.
27. Stronger, Kanye West
28. We Fly High, Jim Jones
29. U + Ur Hand, Pink
30. Walk It Out, Unk
31. Beautiful Girls, Sean Kingston
32. This Ain't A Scene, It's An Arms Race, Fall Out Boy
33. Bartender, T-Pain Featuring Akon
34. Pop, Lock & Drop It, Huey
35. Runaway Love, Ludacris Featuring Mary J. Blige
36. Rockstar, Nickelback
37. Thnks Fr Th Mmrs, Fall Out Boy
38. What I've Done, Linkin Park
39. Summer Love, Justin Timberlake
40. You, Lloyd Featuring Lil' Wayne
41. Wait For You, Elliott Yamin
42. Last Night, Diddy Featuring Keyshia Cole
43. Make It Rain, Fat Joe Featuring Lil Wayne
44. Make Me Better, Fabolous Featuring Ne-Yo
45. Ice Box, Omarion
46. Lips Of An Angel, Hinder (honestly, this sounds like BAD Nickelback, which is something too horrible to fathom)
47. Waiting On The World To Change, John Mayer
48. Lost Without U, Robin Thicke
49. I'm A Flirt, R. Kelly Or Bow Wow (Featuring T.I. & T-Pain)
50. If Everyone Cared, Nickelback (never heard it, sure it sucks)
51. Get It Shawty, Lloyd
52. Face Down, The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
53. The Way I Live, Baby Boy Da Prince Featuring Lil Boosie
54. Shortie Like Mine, Bow Wow Featuring Chris Brown & Johnta Austin
55. It Ends Tonight, The All-American Rejects
56. A Bay Bay, Hurricane Chris
57. Because Of You, Ne-Yo
58. I Tried, Bone Thugs-N-Harmony Featuring Akon
59. Welcome To The Black Parade, My Chemical Romance
60. Shawty, Plies Featuring T-Pain
61. Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol
62. Beautiful Liar, Beyonce & Shakira
63. Sexyback, Justin Timberlake
64. Keep Holding On, Avril Lavigne
65. Let It Go, Keyshia Cole Featuring Missy Elliott & Lil Kim
66. Apologize, Timbaland Featuring OneRepublic
67. Bubbly, Colbie Caillat
68. Like A Boy, Ciara
69. Who Knew, Pink
70. Never Again, Kelly Clarkson
71. Promise, Ciara
72. Bed, J. Holiday
73. Throw Some D's, Rich Boy Featuring Polow Da Don
74. Rehab, Amy Winehouse (this was so much more popular)
75. Big Things Poppin' (Do It), T.I.
76. No One, Alicia Keys
77. The Great Escape, Boys Like Girls
78. 2 Step, Unk
79. Walk Away (Remember Me), Paula DeAnda Featuring The DEY
80. Go Getta, Young Jeezy Featuring R. Kelly
81. Here (In Your Arms), Hellogoodbye
82. On The Hotline, Pretty Ricky
83. Wind It Up, Gwen Stefani
84. Cyclone, Baby Bash Featuring T-Pain
85. Break It Off, Rihanna & Sean Paul
86. First Time, Lifehouse
87. Ayo Technology, 50 Cent Featuring Justin Timberlake & Timbaland
88. Outta My System, Bow Wow Featuring T-Pain & Johnta Austin
89. Teardrops On My Guitar, Taylor Swift
90. Shut Up And Drive, Rihanna
91. Snow (Hey Oh), Red Hot Chili Peppers
92. Money Maker, Ludacris Featuring Pharrell
93. Kiss Kiss, Chris Brown Featuring T-Pain
94. Far Away, Nickelback (sure it sucks, but I never heard it)
95. Rock Yo Hips, Crime Mob Featuring Lil Scrappy
96. Lovestoned, Justin Timberlake (this might be my favorite song EVER. Haters step off.)
97. Better Than Me, Hinder
98. Paralyzer, Finger Eleven
99. That's That, Snoop Dogg Featuring R. Kelly
100. Same Girl, R. Kelly Duet With Usher

and 2008:
...is apparently not there yet.

It's the most wonderful time of the year!

... and by that I mean BAFTA longlist time. Seven days into the year. Aw yeah, that's right. I'm just copy & pasting, so sorry for formatting issues.

Picture
"The Boy in the Striped Pajamas"
"Burn After Reading"
"Changeling"
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
"The Dark Knight "
"Doubt"
"Frost/Nixon"
"In Bruges"
"I've Loved You So Long"
"Milk"
"The Reader"
"Revolutionary Road"
"Slumdog Millionaire"
"Wall-E"
"The Wrestler"
The usual suspects, minus The Boy in the Striped Pajamas, whatever the heck that is. I liked the, uh, five movies that I saw here. I'm rather surprised, though very very happy, that Mamma Mia! isn't here, considering that some people considered it quite good SHUDDER, and it's the highest grossing film EVER in Britain DOUBLE SHUDDER. I predict Curious Case, Doubt, Slumdog Millionaire, Revolutionary Road, and, uh Wall-E? Maybe Frost/Nixon, but I can't see that being as "powerful" for Brits as it is for Americans.

Actor
Benicio del Toro - "Che Part One"
Brad Pitt - "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Christian Bale - "The Dark Knight"
Colin Farrell - "In Bruges"
Dev Patel - "Slumdog Millionaire"
Frank Langella - "Frost/Nixon"
George Clooney - "Burn After Reading"
Javier Bardem - "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Josh Brolin- "W."
Leonardo DiCaprio - "Revolutionary Road"
Michael Fassbender - "Hunger"
Michael Sheen - "Frost/Nixon"
Mickey Rourke - "The Wrestler"
Richard Jenkins- "The Visitor"
Sean Penn - "Milk"
Sure. Did Che actually come out? I wish they'd noted RDJ for Iron Man here, he was better than Bale, Farrell, Clooney, Bardem, and, yes, Penn (though it's close) at least :( I guess five between Pitt, Penn, Patel, Langella, Sheen, and Rourke. Langella's probably a lock, Sheen might be.

Actress
Angelina Jolie - "Changeling"
Anne Hathaway - "Rachel Getting Married"
Cate Blanchett - "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Frances McDormand - "Burn After Reading"
Kate Winslet - "Revolutionary Road"
Kate Winslet - "The Reader"
Keira Knightley - "The Duchess"
Kristen Scott Thomas - "I’ve Loved You So Long"
Meryl Streep - "Mamma Mia!"
Meryl Streep - "Doubt"
Nicole Kidman - "Australia"
Penelope Cruz - "Elegy"
Rebecca Hall - "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Sally Hawkins - "Happy-Go-Lucky"
Scarlett Johansson - "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
THANK YOU for pseudo-nominating ScarJo, who rocked in Vicky Cristina Barcelona and got no gratitude for it. Then again, they probably nominated any female who set foot on screen this year. This is tricky... Hawkins, Winslet, Streep (for Doubt), Jolie, Blanchett? I normally would switch out Hathaway for Jolie, but Changeling did VERY well on these longlists and I don't see it getting snubbed entirely.

Supporting Actor
Brad Pitt - "Burn After Reading"
Brendan Gleeson - "In Bruges"
David Kross - "The Reader"
Eddie Marsan - "Happy-Go-Lucky"
Heath Ledger - "The Dark Knight"
John Malkovich - "Burn After Reading"
John Malkovich - "Changeling"
Josh Brolin - "Milk"
Kevin Bacon - "Frost/Nixon"
Peter O’Toole - "Dean Spanley"
Philip Seymour Hoffman - "Doubt"
Ralph Fiennes - "The Duchess"
Ralph Fiennes - "In Bruges"
Ralph Fiennes - "The Reader"
Robert Downey Jr. - "Tropic Thunder"
I would laugh really hard if the nominees ended up being Malkovich, Malkovich, Fiennes, Fiennes, Fiennes, but they won't. I think he might get in for In Bruges or The Reader, though. Anyway, uh, Kross, Ledger, Brolin, Hoffman, Fiennes (In Bruges).

Supporting Actress
Amy Adams - "Doubt"
Charlotte Rampling - "The Duchess"
Elsa Zylberstein - "I've Loved You So Long"
Emma Thompson- "Brideshead Revisited"
Freida Pinto - "Slumdog Millionaire"
Judi Dench - "Quantum of Solace"
Julie Walters - "Mamma Mia!"
Kathy Bates - "Revolutionary Road"
Marisa Tomei - "The Wrestler"
Penélope Cruz - "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
Rebecca Hall - "Frost/Nixon"
Tilda Swinton - "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Tilda Swinton - "Burn After Reading"
Vera Farmiga - "The Boy in the Striped Pajamas"
Viola Davis - "Doubt"
Julie Walters automatically makes this list INVALID and they will longlist-nominate Judi Dench for ANYTHING. I have no idea what Hall's role is actually like in Frost/Nixon, but if it's relatively big she may get in, since nothing else jumps out to me here. Cruz, Tomei, Davis, Adams...?

Original Screenplay
"Burn After Reading"
"Changeling"
"Che Part One"
"Happy-Go-Lucky"
"Hunger"
"In Bruges"
"I’ve Loved You So Long"
"Milk"
"Rachel Getting Married"
"Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
"The Visitor"
"W."
"Wall-E"
"Waltz With Bashir"
"The Wrestler"
I like how the Brits seemed to love W. far more than we did. Wall-E, Happy-Go-Lucky, In Bruges, Milk, Vicky Cristina Barcelona. I badly wish I had room for Rachel Getting Married or The Wrestler in my predictions.

Adapted Screenplay
"The Baader Meinhof Complex"
"The Boy in the Striped Pajamas"
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
"The Dark Knight "
"Dean Spanley"
"Defiance"
"Doubt"
"The Duchess"
"Frost/Nixon "
"Gomorrah"
"Mamma Mia!"
"Persepolis"
"The Reader"
"Revolutionary Road"
"Slumdog Millionaire"
Aaaand here's where they go crazy with all the films I've never heard of and goddamn fucking Mamma Mia!, for Christ's sake. Seriously, BAFTA?!!!!!! You're all British and snooty and supposed to have better taste than this! Benjamin Button, Doubt, Frost/Nixon, and the last three are major contenders here. And Mamma Mia! BETTER NOT BE.

so this is random.

I want the rest of the Top Chef eliminations this season to go like so:

17. Lauren
16. Patrick
15. Jill
14. Richard
13. Alex
12. Danny
11. Ariane
Can't stand her. Her attitude ("ohhh I'm SO OLD") and stupid face bothers me. Everything she's made has been either terrible or really, really boring. Ooh, she can cook turkey. IDC.

10. Melissa
She's not bringing anything, her food is often the worst, and her bangs really bother me.

9. Eugene
There's something about him I just like. But, other than the first challenge, his food hasn't really been very good.

8. Carla
I don't think she's bringing much to the table (heh). But, she amuses me with her crazy hair and eyes.

7. Jeff
He doesn't stand out to me. I feel like he's always in the middle. At some point, you have to start stepping it up.

6. Leah
She seems to cook good food (and she's pretty!! Also, I think she's from Scarsdale, which is near my hometown so woot), but her attitude is lousy.

5. Jamie
She started off strong, but I feel like she's getting very frustrated and fading. And she needs to get off her scallop kick. Still, I think she's one of the stronger chefs there, and there's just something very likable about her for me. Probably because she's an underdog.

4. Stefan
I don't see the OMG OF COURSE HE IS GOING TO WIN assumptions that everyone else does... is it because he won the first challenge? He makes very good food, but doesn't stand out to me.

3. Radhika
She needs to make something other than Indian food, but her food (minus the gross chocolate/avocado thing) always looks amazing. I like her personality too.

2. Hosea
Good cook, and a good guy. I think his food looked the best Week 1, so clearly he was the winner of that in my mind. LOL

1. Fabio
Oh, how do I love Fabio. Let me count the ways. I think he's a great chef and his personality is just awesome and hilarious. Please have him be the first European Top Chef, judges!

GENIUS.

THE DUEL
01-15-2009 9:00PM
A FIGHT TO THE FINISH--The office is on eggshells because Andy (Ed Helms) still hasn't found out about fiancee Angela's (Angela Kinsey) affair with Dwight (Rainn Wilson). When Michael (Golden Globe winner Steve Carell) spills the beans, Dwight and Andy take matters into their own hands. Meanwhile, Michael is nervous about being called down to corporate for a meeting with Wallace (Andy Buckley).

PRINCE FAMILY PAPER
01-22-2009 9:00PM
FAMILY BUSINESS—Michael (Golden Globe winner Steve Carell) and Dwight (Rainn Wilson) go undercover to do a bit of industrial espionage on a paper company competitor. Meanwhile, the rest of the office holds a debate to settle the question: is Hilary Swank hot?

These are, obviously, the episode description for the next two episodes of The Office (eek, sorry I never talked about "The Surplus" or "Moroccan Christmas" in any depth). I think they sound amazing. I'm so glad they're going to just get the Dwangelandy plot over with (hopefully, supposedly), because it's getting a little old and I no longer feel bad for Dwight and Angela, just want them to fucking get back together again already and stop dicking around with Andy. And the second part of the "Prince Family Paper" description actually made me laugh out loud. How funny! Poor Hilary, picked on by all the bitchy Oscar/film bloggers and now by The Office. Hee.

Also, I take it as a good thing that JAM isn't mentioned in any of these episodes. After all, they didn't mention them in the summary for "Chair Model." Especially if the Dwangelandy thing gets resolved, I think we're in for some big developments in the second part of the season...

Just one question: Where's Jan? I know I'm the only one who cares about her, but I do. :(

Dear self,

Stop writing these GD "dear ____" posts.

Love,
Self

Dear The Soup,

Yeah, you're still funny. But Joel? Even though you appear on Keith Olbermann's show every so often, and that's kind of awesome? You believe your own hype now. And it's kind of hurting your show, which used to be significantly funnier.

Love,
Justine Credible

Dear the writers and directors and such of 27 Dresses,

If you're trying to convince me that Katherine Heigl is completely unattractive and doomed to be a spinster just because she dyed her hair a shade of mild brown, y'all be crazy.

Love,
Justine Credible

Dear dumbass movie reviewers:

Please stop comparing Revolutionary Road to Mad Men, either favorably or unfavorably. Yes, Revolutionary Road was written in 1961, around the time that Mad Men takes place; however, Revolutionary Road is set in 1955, a very different era. Seriously, this is from someone who hasn't even seen the GD movie, nor all that much of Mad Men.

Love,
Justine Credible

great Project Runway skit

I can officially say that this skit is the only good thing to come out of JESUS' hosting of SNL last season or whatever.:

Bill Heder, though, I love ya, but that's a sad and pathetic Tim Gunn impression. Ugh, Tim Gunn, please be a large part of my life. Like, please make it turn out that you're my uncle or something. "Wise Bravo elder" and "silver tranny feroshia" indeed.

So,

the only movies I really have any interest in seeing are Revolutionary Road and The Wrestler, and the only movies that I've seen that are likely to play a role in the awards season were Wall-E, The Dark Knight, Vicky Christina Barcelona, and Milk, all of which I adored, Wall-E above all. Oh, and Tropic Thunder. I highly approve RDJ and Tom Cruise being nominated.

Frost/Nixon - zzzz
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button - I'm sure this will actually be great, if/when I see it. But for now, I just see long, and Cate Blanchett being all actressy.
The Reader - wasn't crazy about the book
Slumdog Millionaire - I am a cynic.
Happy-Go-Lucky - Okay, I do want to see this, but it's nowhere.
Changeling - zzz, Angelina, and mediocre reviews.
Australia - oh, Baz. Why must you frustrate me so.
Rachel Getting Married - like I'd ever be excited to see an Anne Hathaway movie, but I actually am sort of looking forward to seeing this some time
Doubt - great talent, including Meryl and JESUS, but it just doesn't look special

So... yeah. Remember when this was a movie blog ;_; I also think I said that I'd be getting In Bruges soon, but whoopsies, I put the Sex and the City movie at the top of my Netflix queue instead, heh.

Golden Globe predix.

Y not rite? Warning, I'm so bad at predicting these things.

Best Picture, Drama
Winner: Slumdog Millionaire
Alternate: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Best Picture, Musical/Comedy
Winner: Vicky Christina Barcelona
Alternate: Mamma Mia! GAG HURL VOM.

Best Actor, Drama
Winner: Sean Penn, Milk
Alternate: Mickey Rourke, The Wrestler

Best Actor, Musical/Comedy
Winner: Javier Bardem, Vicky Christina Barcelona
Alternate: Dustin Hoffman, Last Chance Harvey

Best Actress, Drama
Winner: Kate Winslet, Revolutionary Road
Alternate: Meryl Streep, Doubt

Best Actress, Musical/Comedy
Winner: umm... Sally Hawkins, Happy-Go-Lucky ?
Alternate: any of the other nominees

Best Supporting Actor
Winner: Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight
Alternate: don't need one but Philip Seymour Hoffman, Doubt

Best Supporting Actress
Winner: Penelope Cruz, Vicky Christina Barcelona
Alternate: any of the other nominees, except maybe Amy Adams

Best Director
Winner: David Fincher, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Alternate: Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire

Best Screenplay
Winner: Slumdog Millionaire
Alternate: Doubt

Foreign Language Film: I've Loved You So Long
Animated Film: Wall-E
Original Score: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Original Song: "The Wrestler" by Bruce Springsteen, from The Wrestler

TV Series, Drama: Mad Men
TV Series, Comedy: 30 Rock
Actor in a TV Series, Drama: Michael C. Hall, Dexter
Actor in a TV Series, Musical/Comedy: Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock
Actress in a TV Series, Drama: verrah verrah tricky to call. Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer
Actress in a TV Series, Musical/Comedy: Tina Fey, 30 Rock
Supporting Actor: Neil Patrick Harris, How I Met Your Mother (please!!)
Supporting Actress: Laura Dern, Recount

Meryl Streep owns.

The longest she's ever gone without an Oscar nomination since her first? Five years - between 1990 (Postcards from the Edge) and 1995 (The Bridges of Madison County).

STREEPOWNAGE

(It's fitting that something this random-ass is my first post of '09. Holla)

Should all acquaintance be forgot
and never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and days of auld lang syne?

Happy 2009!

I'll end 2008...

with my favorite underreported moment of the election:

OldandConfused!McCain cracks me up.

for once, in non-defense of snark.

I was reading New York Magazine and they reviewed some book that speaks out against snark. They didn't have a very positive view of said book. I don't blame them; as might be assumed from my blog title, I have a very positive view of snark. That said, the review defended Television Without Pity's brand of snark, calling the viewers there exactly what TV executives want, passionate and opinionated.

Oh. Hell. No.

I used to LOVE Television Without Pity, back in like, the beginning of high school when everyone watched Survivor. They didn't cover many TV shows, but they did a great job of recapping and gently poking fun at the things that weren't so great about these TV shows. Over the years, they've gotten more expansive, with larger forums and more shows and recappers, and now Television Without Pity simply fucking sucks. Its motto is "spare the snark, spoil the networks," but it might as well be "spare the snark, leave the people who like to bitch about everything in the cold." No recapper seems to actually enjoy the show they watch; the chick that used to review Survivor from uh, Pearl Islands? on spewed hate on every single damn contestant, and the guy who did The Office in S2 treated it like it was fucking Masterpiece Theater. It's these people that piss me off when it comes to The Office; it's not The Serious Jim And Pam Talk About Their Issues Show, it's The Office. The most celebrated episode involves the boss grilling his foot, and one of the employees running into a pole and vomiting all over his car.

The forums are even worse, despite how respectable they may seem at first glance due to the good grammar and whatnot. The moderators have ridiculous rules and moderate with iron fists. Though some recappers on the site are still good, the forums do not understand the difference between "snark" and "being a humongous asshole for the sake of it." It's very rare that anything positive is said about anything. It's like if someone made a major forum about Anne Hathaway, and the only person who ever posted there was me.

So, to conclude. Snark = good; Television Without Pity = bad.

So, I really have no desire

to see Slumdog Millionaire. I will probably try to see it, just for Oscar completionism or whatever, but it just looks like one of those Inspirational Impoverished Ethnic Kid Does Good movies.

Dear Tim Gunn,

(I wish there was some better video, but sadly that's the best I could find)

Please come and assist me in my life. You don't even have to say anything, just when I am about to make a bad decision, peer down your glasses at me. It would be only an added bonus if you said, "[Justine Credible], I am concerned."

Also, if you could tell Bravo reality TV to stop being so fabulous so I'm not tempted to drop out of college and become a chef and/or fashion designer. I do not know how to do either of those things.

Love,
Justine Credible.

PS. Christian Siriano and the fat guy on this season that I'm watching, please come be my sidekicks.

I don't like Katy Perry.

I think it's the resemblance to Emily Blunt, especially in the "I Kissed A Girl" video.

Okay, that's not the best picture of Katy to prove this similarity, but seriously, watch the "I Kissed A Girl" video. I can say, with certainty, that Katy Perry is certainly more faux-lesbian (if you believe salacious gossip, Emily actually did have a lesbian relationship. With Anne Hathaway. Bad taste in women!).

readin' The Reader.

I can imagine Ralph and Kate owning it, but like... I'm sorry, this will make for one BORING movie. (Spoilers abound in this post in case you haven't read the book)

Part 1: Ralph and Kate do it. A lot. Well, more specifically, as the author says 5000000 times throughout the novel, Ralph reads to Kate, then they take a shower, and then they do it, and then they lie together randomly.

Part 2: Ralph goes to law school. Kate's on trial for bein' a Nazi. O noz! (No one saw this coming, especially seeing how the book takes place in Germany.)

Part 3: It turns out Kate... IS ILLITERATE!!!!!!!!!!! Seriously, this is the big twist in the book. I was like, "...whuh?" And then she dies.

Yeah, when it comes to dealing with the Holocaust, Night or Anselm Kiefer it ain't. LAME.

Hotay.

Snarky's ANTM Stuff. Because I am going to try to put up a fairly ambitious ANTM project, but I don't want it crowding up this blog and the fact that I made a separate blog for it made me think I might not run out of steam halfway? Baby steps, people!

Haha, I seriously never saw this before.

Mike Myers is so clearly uncomfortable, even at the beginning. Kanye kind of sounds like he just ran a marathon and/or is going to burst into tears. The sudden, awkward cut is... wow.

I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry

Remember, once upon a time, when I didn't think this movie was going to be that bad? I finally saw it and I... was wrong with that thought.

Oh holy crap, this is offensive!

So I sort of watched The Namesake...

and it's just funny to think, you know, hey, that's KUMAR. (And apparently he's going to be a professor at UPenn next semester. HAH.)

Have yourself a merry little Christmas.

I'll see y'all on the 26th, more or less.

HAH.

So, that shitty Bride Wars movie is going to kill Anne Hathaway's chance at an Oscar, right? I mean, it happened with Eddie Murphy. Frankly, I hope it hurts her chances of getting in at all. Scarlett Johansson gave two fantastic performances in 2003, and apparently Oscar didn't have room for her, but they had to honor Diane Keaton's shitty performance just because, you know, it's Diane Keaton. Christina Ricci turned in the best performance by an actress in 1998, and the Oscars ignored her. The second, however, Anne Hathaway puts on a half-decent performance (note: still haven't seen Rachel Getting Married), Oscar is salivating all over her? I don't think so. I doubt she'll get snubbed, but I'll laugh if she does.

Why do I dislike Anne Hathaway so much? I have no idea.

Tina Fey named Entertainer of the Year.

Here ya go.

I still find her overrated, and almost desperately so, on 30 Rock. But it's hard to argue with this decision in the wake of her GLORIOUS Saturday Night Live Palin skits. I'm sure you've seen them, but here they all are, because why not:

The one that started 'em all, and gave us the line of the year, absolutely: "I can see Russia from my house!" (I'm not crazy about Amy Poehler, but her Hillary here, and her Katie Couric in the next skit, are very underrated.)

"When cornered, you become increasingly adorable." The fact that they used Palin's actual words is a big fat middle finger to her face and I LOVE it.

Fey's Palin and Ferrell's Bush are like a dream come true together. "Both candidates are heavily patriotized and display much characterization." Screw 30 Rock, can Ferrell and Fey just have a TV show about the wacky antics of Bush and Palin?

John McCain is fucking HILARIOUS. He really needs to like, quit politics and join the cast of SNL. I love the fact that he's in a skit that openly mocks his certainly mock-worthy running mate in so many ways. Even Cindy is sort of charming here! Awww.

There is not a thing about this that is not perfect. The random Queen Latifah cameo is great, but the lampooning of EVERYTHING (Biden's passionate arguing for gay rights, but then saying he doesn't support gay marriage; Palin's inane "there you go, Joe!" insults; the fucking winking, "shout-outs," and refusal to actually answer the goddamn questions; Biden's bizarre everyman expressions and McCain love; the Scranton insulting!; the Republicans' constant need to bring up Ronald Reagan; MAVERICK!) pushes it over the top. The only problem is that I don't want to bang the guy who plays Joe Biden, but he does a pretty good job anyway. It's amazing.

oh wow, I JUST discovered the SAG noms came out a while ago...

and Cate Blanchett got snubbed again? HAH!

All I want for Christmas?

Can Jim and Pam and Holly and Michael get married?!?
Oh, and I love this commercial. :)

So, tonight, like the good liberal I am, I watched Countdown.

It was the maybe annual? Favorite People of 2008. It was great to laugh at Keith Olbermann's Sarah Palin and Saturday Night Live's political skit montage. But at the beginning, there was another montage, one about, of course, the man of the year, President-Elect Barack Obama. And, I'm sorry. Thinking about his election and everything it means - for me, this country, and its people - still makes me tear up, well over a month later. This election brought laughs, tears, and frustration, but ultimately, what it gave was, yes - hope. It's absolutely been the highlight of the year, and I may look back on it in a post soon.

God bless this country.

how did I not know this?!?!??!!?

So I've been watching Top Chef this season. I really like it; it's got a minimum of dumb reality TV drama and a maximum of DELICIOUS FOOD. My favorite contestant is Fabio, who is VERY VERY Italian. So, I'm on Bravo's website, reading all the "chieftestant's" bios, and I run across this in his:

Additionally, Fabio also works as William Shatner's private chef.

WHAT.

I mean... WHAT?!??!?!?!?!!

Now I have this mental image of Shatner "singing" "Rocket Man" with Fabio in the background exclaiming things in Italian and cooking. WTF. That's amazing.

The Office Season 5, Ranked So Far.

Above: Because it was so awesome, it bears repeating.

10. Employee Transfer
They were really nice. They gave me a ride home.

9. Business Ethics
I viewed Cookie Monster sings "Chocolate Rain" about a thousand times.

8. Frame Toby
I think you're great. You're my best friend.

7. Moroccan Christmas
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-ka-ching!

6. Baby Shower
Tell my intended about the miracle of childbirth.

5. Customer Survey
I'm going to buy one million dollars worth of paper products today.

4. Crime Aid
Probably get soup or something light.

3. Business Trip
It's totally unrealistic. There are no lines in the parking lot.

2. The Surplus
I'm not threatening you. I love you! But you should know, you're on very dangerous ground.

1. Weight Loss
You lost a ton of weight, literally a ton of weight.

And for a bonus...

BRING THESE TWO BACK!

So Liam Neeson

is like weirdly professorial-y hot in Kinsey right? I'm not just dirty-minded?

Of course, I don't need to talk about Peter Sarsgaard there. Goddamn, he's hot. He's like a sex slug (I may have made this analogy before, and I'm pretty sure I read it somewhere else, I'm not that clever); he just leaves behind a big ol' visible trail of sex wherever he goes, even despite the fact that we all now know he's not all that gifted... heh.

I've bought a ticket to the states! I'm off in three weeks!

To a magical place called... Wisconsin!

It's Christmastime, y'all, and that means it's time for some Love Actually-watching!

well, that's... disgusting.

Apparently ScarJo - who's still my girl, y'all - auctioned off a used tissue? Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

Baz Luhrmann to direct The Great Gatsby?

Uh, I dunno, Baz. I mean... no one's been able to do a good movie version of it until now, what makes you so sure you can do it? Please stick to your batshit crazy musicals!

(Yes, I still need to see Australia, but judging by the attention it's getting this awards season/the reviews, maybe not so much)

this is a few days old and I'm sure you saw it...

But because he wasn't hit? IT NEVER STOPS BEING FUNNY.

Awesome.

Shut the fuck up, Sarah Palin.

(Okay, it was more applicable a few weeks ago when she'd lost the election but would.not.get.off.the.news. Seriously, lady, you do three interviews during the election and like 500000 after. But it's still a good read.)

It's hilarious...

...when a "OMG BUY MAMMA MIA!!!!!" commercial is immediately followed by a commercial for Doubt.

Do the right thing.

I'm almost sure I've posted this here before. I don't really care, because it's so awesome that it should be posted EVERYWHERE. As much as I loved Crash, it gets Crash's point across much better.

Uh, Gran Torino.

What is this movie about? Because I saw my first preview for it today and it basically looked like "OMG Clint Eastwood is racist toward the Asians!!!!!!"

Also, Academy, are you really gonna give Clint another Oscar? Really? Another?

The Spirit.

Dude, just call it Sin City 2 (since that's clearly coming out in about 2087 at the rate it's going) already.

So, Borat is really funny.

I love that Alan Keyes is in it, talkin' 'bout teh ghey. And that McCain and crazy James Carville are in Wedding Crashers.

THIS MOVIE LOOKS GREAT!!!!!

Seriously, when Clive Owen appears promiscuously shirtless in a trailer for a movie, I SHOULD BE INFORMED IMMEDIATELY.

Mickey Rourke made me cry in the trailer alone for The Wrestler, too...

Valkyrie looks so stupid.

"Hitler, Hitler, Hitler, Hitler... you're glib, Hitler."

Hey, Benjamin Button trailer!

You! Yes, you! Don't think I don't realize you're stealing the music from Love Actually!!!

I wish I could wear cute headbands and not look stupid in them.

I really do.

Golden Globe Nominee Reactions.

FINALLY!!!!

For the record, I have seen a grand total of 7 movies nominated: Burn After Reading, Mamma Mia!, Vicky Cristina Barcelona, Pineapple Express, Tropic Thunder, The Dark Knight, and Wall-E. It's been a busy semester. =/ I'm getting In Bruges from Netflix ASAP.

Best Picture, Drama
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Frost/Nixon
The Reader
Revolutionary Road
Slumdog Millionaire
The Visitor
* Like I said above, I haven't seen any of these. But I'm dying to see any of them, except for maybe The Visitor. I think my mom actually has that at home right now...

Best Picture, Musical/Comedy
Burn After Reading
Happy-Go-Lucky
In Bruges
Mamma Mia!
Vicky Cristina Barcelona
* Love BAR and VCB, despise Mamma Mia, please let me see the other two soon.

Best Director
Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire
Stephen Daldry, The Reader
David Fincher, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Ron Howard, Frost/Nixon
Sam Mendes, Revolutionary Road
* So happy that Mendes is getting recognized again and Fincher is getting recognized at all.

Best Actor, Drama
Leonardo DiCaprio, Revolutionary Road
Frank Langella, Frost/Nixon
Sean Penn, Milk
Brad Pitt, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Mickey Rourke, The Wrestler
* I haven't heard anyone say a bad word about any of these guys. Damn.

Best Actor, Musical/Comedy
Javier Bardem, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Colin Farrell, In Bruges
James Franco, Pineapple Express
Brendan Gleeson, In Bruges
Dustin Hoffman, Last Chance Harvey
* I've never heard of Last Chance Harvey, but whatevs. Loved Franco, Bardem was pretty great, and I'll see Farrell and Gleeson ASAP.

Best Actress, Drama
Anne Hathaway, Rachel Getting Married
Angelina Jolie, Changeling
Meryl Streep, Doubt
Kristin Scott Thomas, I've Loved You So Long
Kate Winslet, Revolutionary Road
* HAHAHA CATE GOT SNUBBED HAHAHAHA. And, I'll repeat: Anne Hathaway's getting an Oscar nomination this year, isn't she? Dammit.

Best Actress, Musical/Comedy
Rebecca Hall, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Sally Hawkins, Happy-Go-Lucky
Frances McDormand, Burn After Reading
Meryl Streep, Mamma Mia!
Emma Thompson, Last Chance Harvey
* Again... what is Last Chance Harvey? I liked both Hall (though Johansson was better and it's annoying that everyone in her film got nominated except her) and McDormand, and despised Streep. Please, Globes, don't give her an award in this category just because she's Meryl Streep...

Best Supporting Actor
Tom Cruise, Tropic Thunder
Robert Downey Jr., Tropic Thunder
Ralph Fiennes, The Duchess
Philip Seymour Hoffman, Doubt
Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight
* I am IN LOVE with this category! It shows real creativity but the quality is very there too. LOVE the Cruise nod!!!!

Best Supporting Actress
Amy Adams, Doubt
Penelope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Viola Davis, Doubt
Marisa Tomei, The Wrestler
Kate Winslet, The Reader
* I don't quite get all the hype about Penelope in VCB, I mean she was really good but not like "OMG INSTANTLY HAND HER THE OSCAR RIGHT NOW NO SRSLY" good. And JESUS!

Other assorted notes:
- LOL, Best Song is Bruce Springsteen vs. Miley.
- awww, True Blood got nominated for Best Television Series, Drama. My best friend and his suite gather 'round every Sunday night to watch it. It's kind of adorable. What I've seen is unfortunately really bad.
- THANK YOU for getting some sense back, Globes, and nominating The Office anew.

Et voila.

S4 ranked.

I'm pretty sure this is the way it'll stay. I'm pretty sure I did this list already, but it changed. Why am I doing this now? No idea.

14. Night Out
No, Dwight, not the good peanut butter!

13. Branch Wars
Jim... if this is it for me, promise me something... host the Dundies!

12. The Deposition
Delivery was all wrong. You're butchering it.

11. Launch Party
Am I scared of a stupid computer? Please.

10. Job Fair
Everybody, I'm dating Barack Obama!

9. Survivor Man
I will never let him lose his dignity.

8. Local Ad
Oh, it has losers.

7. Dunder-Mifflin Infinity
And... I miss you, man, and I love you. His words.

6. Did I Stutter?
It will be towed by a donkey.

5. Fun Run
People keep calling me a wunderkind. I don't even know what that means.

4. Goodbye Toby
I am totally gonna bang Holly.

3. Dinner Party
She is! She is the devil! I'm in hell!

2. Chair Model
I am not kidding. Got it a week after we started dating.

1. Money
Oh my God. What century is this?

Hugh Jackman's hosting the Oscars?!

Rock. The hell. On!

(He'd better sing & dance.)

Updates soon:

1. Globes!
2. Joe the Biden got a puppy!!!!
3. Christmas episode! Which was apparently "weird" and "not warm and fuzzy" and therefore horrible! (coughitdidnthavealotofJAMinitcough)

Hey, governors!

Spitzer, Palin, Blagodviiiiiijjjjjjjjjjj... is there anyone left that isn't corrupt?

(Brian Schweitzer!)

(Oh, right-wingers, shut up about how it's ALL OBAMA'S FAULT OMG SO CORRUPT. This Blago guy referred to Obama as a "motherfucker" because Obama wasn't going to bribe him to get his preferred candidate for his abandoned Senate seat. And, more than likely, it was Obama's Jew dreamboat Chief of Staff [I'll fuck you! I'll kill you! I love you k bye.] who busted Blago. Game, set, match.)

SNL. Stop not sucking.

Seriously, you're really funny nowadays. You need to stop that, it's freaking me out.

2016.

Montana Governor Brian Schweitzer. LOVE.

Seriously, he showed he could positively ignite a crowd at this year's DNC - just like Obama did in 2004. He's massively popular, with approval ratings in the high 70s, doing awesome things for his state, and his popularity is turning Montana bluer (McCain won the state, but by a smaller margin than Obama won Ohio or Florida). He is actively bipartisan; his lieutenant governor is a Republican. And, I would especially enjoy Republicans' heads exploding over how a Democrat could out-folksy them. Seriously, this guy appears to bring his (adorable!!!!!!!) dog to every meeting, campaign stop, and press conference. From everything I've seen, I can declare: He's so awesome. Schweitzer 2016!

My Top ANTM Girls, 25-1.

25. Mercedes
24. Chantal
23. Lisa
22. Jayla
21. AJ
20. Shandi
19. Leslie
18. Marjorie
17. Jaslene
16. Danielle
15. Nicole
14. Michelle
13. Giselle
12. Norelle (haha, attack of the -elles! If only Nicole and Danielle switched places.)
11. Brittany
10. CariDee
9. Christina
8. Yaya
7. April
6. Jenah
5. Joanie
4. Adrianne
3. Analeigh
2. Kahlen
1. Anya

I'm actually not busy tonight...

so, three posts.

1. talking about how much The Office tonight was amazing
2. finishing that top 100 ANTM girls list
3. my choice for the Democratic candidate in 2016 after 8 awesome years of Obama.

So. #1. THE OFFICE TONIGHT WAS AMAZING. That is all for now, until I rewatch and give a full explanation. Easily top 20, almost top 10, episode ever. I am STILL laughing at Michael in a fur coat.

but one more quick post:

Prop 8: THE MUSICAL.

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

okay, guys.

I'm really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really busy. I think I'm closin' up shop 'til the 14th or so, when I'll be back with a vengeance. I'll probably post extremely sporadically, or if something AMAZING happens IE it turns out Anne Hathaway was involved in her ex-boyfriend's crimes and she goes to jail FOREVER.

See y'all in a few weeks! (why was this so folksy?)

So now I'm back, from outer space

...or the land of food poisoning and thesis writing.