Oh, screw you, Television Without Pity.

On their "list of reasons to be happy summer's over":

10. The Mole can be officially retired until Anderson Cooper decides he wants to come back.
Ahh, the revamped Mole. And by "revamped," ABC forgot to tell you they meant boring, terribly cast, and dumbed-down considerably. Bring back Anderson Cooper and the rest of the things that made the original Mole great and we'll get interested.

Uh, okay. Boring? Not for this viewer, and quite a few others. Terribly cast? Fuck, no. I don't wanna hear "but Paul and Nicole were annoying!" Compared to other reality TV bitches, they were far more entertaining, and they both have huge fanbases, actually. Dumbed down? Uh, how? Because they had one challenge where they had to walk around in their underwear? Oh my God, the show's gone the way of I Love New York! CANCEL IT!!!!!!!!!!! Oh and hey TWOP, if you didn't like this season of The Mole so much, why'd you give every single episode an A or A-, hmmm?

Oh, and I'm the biggest fan of Anderson Cooper alive, probably, but: he's not coming back, get the fuck over it! Jon Kelley was a robot in the very first part of the very first episode, but he got to be nearly as awesome (not as awesome, because A-Coops is the best reality TV show host of all time). Ugh. At least the people over on TWoP's boards seem similarly disgusted by this part of the article...

What made the original Mole so great, anyway? Anderson Cooper, surely, yes. But like I said: Not. Coming. Back. Ever. Maybe the biggest factor in making the show so great, though, was the cool spy-like feeling of the show, and the gleeful paranoia involved in arguing passionately for a certain _____FOMO camp. None of that went away. In conclusion, again, screw you, TWoP. Your recaps kind of suck, too (though I like whoever does the ones for The Mole, the ones for, say, Survivor are repulsively negative toward anyone on the show [if you hate everyone so much, why are you bothering to watch?], and the ones for The Office S2 are so ridiculously overanalytical it's almost torture to slag through them, sorry to whoever wrote those).

Toby gets some! Sorta.

GOD, S4 DVD. Why did you come early for some people, but not me. Grrr.

Wow.

C'mon, McCain. If you were gonna choose a chick, go with Kay Bailey Hutchinson. She knows what the fuck she's doing.

the only good thing about Sarah Palin...

...is that her daughter Piper (Piper Palin's the best name in the world until you're like, 12. Then, it turns awful.) gives Sasha Obama some competition in the "cutest child involved in the presidential race in some way" award. She doesn't win, but at least Sasha's got some competition now.

Sasha Obama is so cute.

God, I love George Clooney.

And Brad Pitt ain't too shabby either.

Move to Clooney, who had to deal with the standard "will you ever get married and settle down" question.
"I am so surprised to hear that question. That is honestly the first time I have been asked that," Clooney responded. "I am getting married and having a child today."

BWAH!

God loves The New York Times.

Timothy Egan OWNS the terribly pandering, overall awful choice of Sarah Palin.

"Weight Loss": it's official!

WEIGHT LOSS
09-25-2008
9:00PM
For the first time, we see what happens over eight weeks of the summer, as a Dunder Mifflin weight loss initiative causes the branch to diet and become obsessed with their weight. Michael (Steve Carell) pursues a friendship with his new HR rep, Holly (Oscar nominee, Amy Ryan). Jim (John Krasinski) misses Pam (Jenna Fischer) who attends art school in New York. Dwight (Rainn Wilson), Andy (Ed Helms) and Angela (Angela Kinsey) attend to unfinished business.

SO EXCITED!!!! Dwangelandy!!! and we know JAM doesn't break up!!! Now please GOD have Jim propose already.

blaaahhh

It sucks that:

a. I don't have a TV in my apartment here
b. the internet connection is soooo sloooowww and I can't see Obama's speech.

DAMMIT.

Heh!

A (fake) Spanish diary by Woody Allen.

Lame.

Jenna Fischer has a pretty lame interview here. It only further convinces me that chick, as much as I love her acting and think she kicks ass, should not ever go anywhere near the writers' board for The Office (I mean, Jenna, I love you, but your ideas are just dumb. Roy should be back! Jim and Pam aren't meant to be together and are just supposed to push each other toward the person they're supposed to marry! Jim and Pam aren't ready to be engaged yet! Making a separate show called Art School seems so great! It really doesn't matter if Pam doesn't come back to D-M Scranton!).

Oh, and I don't buy the "we don't know if she's going back to D-M yet." Of course they do. They're just not telling us.

One thing I'm not worried much about this season? JAM. I keep the faith.

Eeeee!

Less than one month 'til PREMIERE DAY!!!!

BTW: Back at school, so far less posting.

Love. Them!

Leo & Kate recreate Titanic pose.

Hahaha!

12 Movies Made Better by Usain Bolt.

Because it's him I've fallen in love with this Olympics, not Michael Phelps.

ROCK ME SEXY JESUS!

How funny does this movie look?

"Weight Loss" promo picture!!!

Are Michael and Holly posing the same? Awwww.

Hmm, Angela's hiding her hands...

WTF happened to Meredith's face?

Love Jim's hair. Why's he look so bummed out? He's hiding his hands too (elopement??? Or just the Jim Pose?)...

Kelly looks rather bummed as well...

It's weird without Pam.

I'M SO EXCITED!!!

Must Ben Stiller's dad have a cameo in every Ben Stiller movie?

(Note: Tropic Thunder may not apply, as I haven't seen it)

CROSSOVER!!!

So in Vicky Cristina Barcelona, there's a scene (I think it's even in the preview) where Javier Bardem's character invites Vicky (Rebecca Hall) and Cristina (ScarJo) to his room "to make love to them." And the entire time, of course, I'm like, "NOOOO!!! DON'T GO!!! HE'LL KILL YOU WITH THE AIR PUMP GUN THING!!!!"

... but at least he changed his hair.

Oh, as for the movie? Loved it. Maybe Woody's best since Bullets over Broadway? It's certainly better than all his stuff in the new millennium, as fond as I am of Match Point and Scoop. VCB was hot and steamy, just like Barcelona is in real life. It really captured Spain perfectly, in that it's incredibly interesting and boring as shit all at once (no, really). The cast was fantastic, and I have to disagree that Penelope was head and shoulders above the others; they all rocked (save Patty Clarkson, who was totally boring).

Haha.

Yeah, this movie thinks it's smarter than it is.

Hahaha:

Funny stuff, though you've probably already seen it.

I only wish it went on for more than a minute! C'mon, Barack, announce your VP already.

The Office Season 5, Ep. 1 & 2

I'm not 100% sure I posted this (though I probably did), but the S5 premiere will take place over the eight weeks of summer, and will likely be called "Weight Loss." It'll concern the various branches of Dunder-Mifflin taking part in a company-wide weight-loss challenge. Apparently, Pam's at Pratt, with Jim visiting her at least once, and Toby's going to be in a Costa Rican hospital because he'll injure himself on a zip line. Heh. Okay, if that's how they're going to bring Toby back, then that's hysterical and I approve.

The second episode in S5 is going to be, apparently, "Business Ethics." Holly (Yay! HOLLY!) will put on a business ethics class only to find out that Dunder-Mifflin Scranton, well, doesn't exactly partake in those sort of things. This episode sounds very "Diversity Day," which can only be a good thing. :D

I'm so excited!! IS IT SEPTEMBER YET???

go, USA!

If Michael Phelps was a country, he'd be tied for sixth at the Olympics right now. Heh.

That said...

...here are my favorite shots of those that lasted a while in every "cycle" (I'm just gonna call 'em seasons), based on my extremely unprofessional opinion.

Season 1
Giselle
Kesse
Robin
Elyse
Shannon
Adrianne

Season 2
Jenascia
Xiomara
Catie
Sara
Camille
April
Shandi
Mercedes
Yoanna

Season 3
Kristi
Jennipher
Kelle
Cassie
Toccara
Nicole
Norelle
Ann
Amanda
Yaya
Eva

Season 4
Noelle
Lluvy
Rebecca and Tiffany
Tatiana
Michelle
Christina
Brittany
Keenyah
Kahlen
Naima

Season 5
Diane
Coryn
Kyle
Lisa
Kim
Jayla
Bre
Nik
Nicole

Season 6
Gina
Mollie Sue
Leslie
Brooke
Nnenna
Furonda
Sara
Jade
Joanie
Danielle

Season 7
Megg
AJ
Brooke
Anchal
Jaeda
Michelle
Amanda
Eugena
Melrose
CariDee

Season 8
Felicia
Diana
Sarah
Whitney
Jael
Brittany (or maybe this one)
Dionne
Renee
Natasha
Jaslene

Season 9
Victoria (why the hell was she eliminated so early?)
Janet
Ebony
Sarah
Ambreal
Lisa
Heather
Bianca
Jenah
Chantal
Saleisha

Season 10
Amis
Marvita
Aimee
Claire
Stacy Ann
Lauren
Katarzyna
Dominique
Fatima
Anya (I like Whitney, based on pictures alone, but how the hell did Anya lose?)
Whitney

My Favorites By Cycle
Again, I haven't seen the entirety of any of these cycles, so these girls could be horrible, raging bitches, in which case I'd root hardcore against any of them, but they're good at modeling from my extremely unprofessional opinion.
Cycle 1: Adrianne
Cycle 2: Shandi
Cycle 3: Norelle
Cycle 4: Kahlen, with a nod to Christina
Cycle 5: Nicole
Cycle 6: Joanie, with a nod to Danielle and Sara
Cycle 7: CariDee
Cycle 8: Brittany, with a nod to Renee
Cycle 9: Jenah, with a nod to Victoria (yes)
Cycle 10: Anya
Based on pictures alone, I'd have to say my 5 favorites are probably Anya, CariDee, Adrianne, Shandi, and Melrose. I also honestly think that if they hadn't cut Victoria so early for such a BS reason (was she a horrible bitch or something?), she would have become an easy favorite of her season and maybe even of all time.

Guilty confession.

So, VH1's been rerunning America's Next Top Model, and beyond the utter stupidity of everyone involved in it, and the crying that never seems to end? It's actually really interesting. I'm really into fashion and photography and all that, and though I'm no great judge I have definite "favorites" of every season, just looking at the photos on blogs or whatever (though I haven't seen any of the seasons all the way through). Awesome.

Heh.

The Dark Knight's reign of terror (not really, it was one hell of a movie) at the box office finally ends.

EW's 20 Fall Movies We Can't Wait to See.

20. Burn After Reading
Yes. It looks hilarious, and I've officially been pulled in by the Coen brothers again, after years of being ridiculously uneven. And I love the poster!

19. Eagle Eye
I wasn't even aware this was a movie until this article. Shia LaBeouf is, by law, always the best part about a bad movie (still haven't seen that fourth Indiana Jones movie though, whoopsy-daisy). So, this seems to infer it'll be bad. My girl Rosario's in it though, so.

18. Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist
Michael Cera playing "cute" again (but OMG, gay cute! what range!) and a really dumb, "LOOK HOW QUIRKY WE ARE" synopsis? I'm not rushing out to see this one, but who knows. I thought Juno looked terrible from the trailer.

17. Body of Lies
Even though Ridley's latest work has been lackluster, I'll gladly see anything starring Leo and Russell, and written by William Monahan (I can't get over how amazing The Departed's screenplay was). I think this might be a return to form for Ridley, but I thought that about Kingdom of Heaven and American Gangster too, so.

16. W.
It looks really interesting, if nothing else, and holy hell it's got such an amazing cast (how'd I miss Dreyfuss, Bradford, Gruffud, and especially Wright being cast?!?!). It's Oliver Stone, though, so it may be ludicrously uneven or incredibly unsubtle. We'll see.

15. High School Musical 3: Senior Year
Heh. Not seeing it. That said, I've sat through the original so many times as a camp counselor I think I could recite it by heart.

14. Changeling
I always look forward to Clint Eastwood's films in the new millennium. They're usually excellent, and even if they're not they're at least interesting.

13. Zack and Miri Make a Porno
I love you, Seth Rogen. I'm tired of you, Kevin Smith. It does look cute, though. I think I'll try to see it.

12. Rachel Getting Married
I like the trailer (even if it is far too Margot at the Wedding), but Anne Hathaway is the lamest of the lame. Who knows, though, she could finally impress me. (Pfft.)

11. Quantum of Solace
I'm never like "YEAH!!! JAMES BOND!!!" but Daniel Craig is awesome at the role and Casino Royale was terrific. I'll be there.

10. Australia
I keep forgetting this movie's coming out. I don't think that's a good thing for Baz "ATTENTION PLEASE!!!" Luhrmann, and I'm wary of his non-musical movies. That said, it could still be awesome.

9. The Road
I don't know how they're going to pull this off, but I hope they do. The book is so damn good, though...

8. Synecdoche, New York
I wondered what the hell happened to this when its many release dates passed and no one talked about it. It's got an amazing cast and what might be one of the best screenwriters of all time - what's not to look forward to? I'm drooling.

7. The Soloist
This movie looks lame. Joe Wright, though, is not the type to make sappy Oscar bait. And it's got Robert Downey Jr., who I love, and I hope it's a return to form for Jamie Foxx, who was awesome in 2004 and 2005, but decided to suck in every single movie since then.

6. Four Christmases
Wasn't this the movie where Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon were constantly at each others' throats while filming? I wanna see this movie just to see if they even somewhat pass as a couple or just blatantly hate each other. I'm hoping the latter, because I'll giggle.

5. Defiance
Edward Zwick's movies are generally terrible, but the Academy fawns all over them, so they're almost always required viewing during the awards season. At least the three leads are massively talented.

4. Twilight
I don't care about these books (though I've read some excerpts which are hilariously bad), and I really don't care about this movie.

3. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
It looks really interesting. Fincher's a terrific director. I'm excited!

2. Marley & Me
This is another movie I wasn't aware existed. It looks like a stupid sort of biopic starring two mediocre actors. I think it's a "skip it"... but, for completion, I'll probably end up seeing it.

1. Revolutionary Road
God, yes, please. I'm afraid it's going to fail, but who knows. I sure as hell hope it's brilliant. I've come to expect it from Kate and Leo. LOVE them, especially together!

Hee! Hee hee!!

I haven't seen this actually on NBC yet, but apparently it airs without the little "icons," which is a DAMN SHAME. Anyway, this commercial's really effing funny. Murderball - murder checkers! IS IT SEPTEMBER YET?

Oh man.

I'm dying to see Vicky Cristina Barcelona AND Tropic Thunder. WHAT? Justine Credible talks MOVIES? Hopefully I can see either/both before I go back to school, and write about 'em here...

Mole vids.

Most ridiculously adorable Mole contestant ever?

Mark's got a really smart philosophy about these sort of things. Probably because he's the best winner of any reality TV competition ever. You know it.

TOO FUNNY.

FREE JENNA FISCHER!!!

Hilarious!

yet another Mole post...

Post-execution interviews:

Marcie.
Liz.
Ali & Bobby.
Victoria.
Kristen.
Alex.
Clay.
Paul.
Nicole.
Mark.
Craig & Clay Newbill, Executive Producer.

These Office spoilers are gettin' weird.

So apparently... Toby injures himself on a zip line in Costa Rica? What the hell. And someone comes back to work at Dunder-Mifflin (it's not Roy, yay!!!!) - Ryan, Jan, Devon, Martin Nash?

The Mole, 8/11 (season finale)

^ Not the Mole, but king of it.

Like I said earlier, I was extremely pleased by the finale. Was it the most shocking finale of all time? Nope, but it was very satisfying. Craig had me totally fooled until the final four, possibly because I was so hung up on Victoria and Clay. He was certainly the one that I most suspected out of the final three, but I wouldn't have been shocked by any of them. My heart was still thudding until Mark leapt out of that door - and then I emitted a borderline horrific victory shriek even louder than the one I did when Paul was executed. Heh.

The "How Mark Won" montage had my jaw dropping multiple times. I thought Mark was on to Craig from Episode 1 (he even got a comment in Episode 1 about it!), and it was Nicole who was barely squeaking by. Oh, this montage also led to my favorite moment of the whole finale, and there were so many to choose from - Paul looking increasingly pissed off as he saw the many times Mark narrowly escaped execution, and that Nicole beat him by four seconds on the last quiz he took. Oh, Paul, karma's a bitch, isn't she? :)

I felt terrible for Nicole during that episode, actually. Not for losing - she handled that well as I knew she would - but because of the way the other players were treating her. Yeah, she's not the nicest person and her attitude clearly got incredibly annoying, but it couldn't have been easy to listen to all the other players talk shit about her. Yeah, she played the game fairly dirty, but so did Paul and nobody's hung up on that. Ali thinking she was genuinely psychotic? Please. I think Nicole was really hurt by Kristen's confessional where she laughed over how she didn't think Nicole could be a doctor; Kristen was one of the few in the game Nicole respected and liked. When asked directly about Nicole, the only person who treated her like a human being last night was Mark (and probably Alex and Clay would have).

So, speaking of Mark... MARK!!! He won!! I can't believe he won!! My favorites never win. Did I mention I love him? Oh, and did he mention he was doing it for his family? That was the one thing about the finale that irritated me, like, editors, I would have loved him enough even if you just mentioned it once. He's still my favorite ever. Like, when he called himself a "putz"?? Could I love him any more??? It was wonderful to see him so gracious, humble, sweet, and even funny at the end ("I hope it's not a tax collector!"). Yay! I just love him. Also, it was really entertaining that he called Victoria "V," because Mark's so the type to come up with nicknames he thinks are all stealthy when in fact they are completely obvious.

Speaking of Victoria, oh my God, how much would you kick yourself if you were her?!?!? Mark is far too obviously my favorite of this season, but I felt awful for her. Gosh, she's adorable, though. I like how they kept cutting to her for random moments/comments, and I wondered why, but... oh yeah, she was the prettiest girl on the show with the best personality. Forgot that.

I loved how sheepish and not a little moved Clay looked during Mark's acknowledgement of him. Clay was an utter hoot and one of my very favorites this season (along with Mark, Victoria, Nicole, and Alex), but he was awfully callous toward Mark. They had a coalition, yes, but the coalition seemed to consist of Mark throwing ideas at Clay, Clay agreeing but not saying much in return, then Clay running off and giving a bazillion confessionals about how Mark could be the Mole. I don't think he realized how much he meant to Mark, and I think it touched him that he did mean, in fact, that much.

I felt Craig was an awesome Mole. He didn't just sabotage the physical things - I mean, he could have bombed Midas Rush and nobody would have gotten on his case about that, but he kicked that challenge's ass. I had to laugh at the fact that Craig kicking sand randomly was in fact a clue - when I saw it the first time, over the clip of Liz talking about the Mole possibly hiding items on the beach, I was like, "Oh, silly editing and your attempt to convince me Craig's the Mole when he probably had something in his pants." Hee. Oh, and how awesome and hysterical was that montage of all the girls giggling over Craig, followed by big red "EXECUTED" stamps on their faces? So awesome! He majorly avoided detection, too (hey, MarkFOMOs, if it was "so obvious and disappointing" that it was Craig, why did you think it was Mark?!). I do wish they'd spent a little time on missions he clearly tried to sabotage and failed, like Grapes of Cache or Go Figure.

Some of those clues were dumb (corbata roja, NOT ALI, so many clues pointing to the final three and not the Mole), but some were AWESOME (I caught the CRG thing during All for One, but dismissed it as just a coincidence; four is; Craig's name never called during executions). What the heck did that sped-up thing say? It sounded like "Craig buried Paul" to me. I even think there were some clues that weren't covered: the N20 on the wine barrels for November 20, and Jon holding up Journal 11 when Craig had it (and was 11th in the credits). ABC has the solutions up to the widget and text clues. People got most of them... and oops, they messed up the EFG PQR ZOO one. Heh.

I wonder why they didn't usually do the thing pre-reveal where they ask the executed players who they think is the Mole, and who won? Probably because they all said "Craig is the Mole and Mark won"... The players seemed way more excited over Mark being revealed as winner than Craig as the Mole.

I was shocked during the Nicole/Mark montages when it turns out they both pegged Kristen as the Mole. Kristen?! WTF? She was the only player all season who was completely unsuspicious. Mark was more suspicious. Marcie was more suspicious!

Ali wants to date Craig; Craig has a man-crush on Mark.

I was so very disappointed by the surprise. I was like OMG ANDERSON COOPER'S COMING BACK!!! ALEX AND NICOLE ARE SECRETLY DATING!!!! THERE'S GONNA BE A SEASON 6 AND I'VE ALREADY BEEN PICKED TO BE THE MOLE!!! And then it was like... oh hey Mark's wife. Not that I wasn't a big ol' sap during that moment. Oh and hey everyone calling him Super Veiny 1950s Dad - his wife wants to stay home, dude.

Oooh, Alex. He's always been cute as hell, plus he's got one great personality, and he finally ditched the awful puberty mustache. Yummy. How's he still single? Also, is it just me or is Bobby good-looking too, with clothes on? His montage was hysterical (running up and down the steps of the Philly Museum, hahahah!), but came in such a weird place in the episode. I love how he's still BFF with Vicky. Awww.

I loved the shots of the players before the results were revealed. Craig was like, "whatever." Mark was doing push-ups or something ridiculous. Nicole was putting on makeup. Hee.

I WANTED A REPEAT OF "PAUL-FREE!!!!"

Overall, it's been a fantastic season and I adored almost every minute of it. Yes, I know people out there might have bitched about Jon Kelley's voice (I don't know why, it was clearly sent from the angels above) or the touchscreen technology or Nicole and Paul, but I really enjoyed it. The Mole is the smartest, best reality show on television, and it deserves to be renewed for all eternity. Great season, great Mole, great winner. :)

BTW, ranking the US Moles:
1. Angie (sabotaging everything and remaining almost undetected)
2. Craig (ditto)
3. Kathryn (I'll always love Mole Queen Kathryn as my favorite Mole, but she was too helpful too often)
4. Bill (maybe because the clues did all but knock on your door, shout, "IT'S BILL!!!" then run away. He got lucky that Elavia and Dorothy were in the game so long, and that Darwin misled soooo many players. He sabotaged quite a bit, but what kind of Mole adds $100000 to the pot???)
5. Frederique (Oh, Freddy. You might have remained undetected, but I think you forgot sabotage is an important part of the Mole's job. Kind of the definition of it.)

Yay!!!!!

As you can imagine, I was mighty pleased at that Mole finale. :D More tomorrow!

oh, and...

half an hour whaaaat.

You know what we need?

More Kate Winslet news. That'd rock. Also, more movies I want to see that would actually inspire me to write about movies in this here movie blog.

twenty twenty twenty four hours to goooo

I wanna know who the Mole is...

(Okay, those lyrics didn't scan so well. Shhh)

Uh, I found my blog on The Office's LiveJournal "official" site?

That's weird. Uh, hi if anyone's actually reading this, and I hope I haven't said anything to insult you (I didn't read the comments to the post, but I can't imagine me thinking Pam's art sucks will go over too well).

WHEEEE!!!!!!

S5 clips!!! I MUST HAVE THEM!!!!

another "OMG" TV moment...

The official Mole website has the preview for the finale up!!!! At the reaction to, presumably, finding out who the Mole is:

- We don't see Marcie
- Liz claps mildly
- Ali claps wildly
- Bobby's eyes bug out of his skull
- so do Victoria's (who gets an extra shot in the preview, because she's TOTALLY THE MOLE! And she's been gone almost the entire season! They tricked y'all good!!!)
- Kristen and her 80-foot-long arms freak out
- Alex leaps out of his chair, spins around, and adopts a victory pose
- Clay doesn't react, but soon starts clapping
- Paul grins, then starts clapping

Feel free to overanalyze this video to point to whoever you think is the Mole... ;) Oh, and discuss the odd clothing choices, like Victoria and Kristen's awful outfits, Alex in a suit (oh, so lovely. When the heck did my crush on Alex materialize?), and the bird that appears to have crashed into Paul's shirt and unfortunately died right there. And Clay's not wearing yellow or green!!!!!

PS. Widget Clue 10 up: THE MOLE, but it's all blurry. Craig without his glasses?

Edit: Here it is on YouTube...:

What the heck is Victoria freaking out about? Why is Alex so excited?

Yayayayyayaayyy!!!

At the opening of the Olympics, they had a commercial with lovely John Krasinski among others, advertising the return of NBC's series. Yay!!! I want a new Office commercial with S5 footage IMMEDIATELY!!!!

Teehee. Tee hee hee.

Darwin's the best. So, so, funny. Plus I met him!!!

I'm the Mole.

So now that we've seen this entire season, or at least all the missions, I've got to pipe in on how I would have been a devious saboteur (love that word!) if I was, in fact, picked to be the Mole this season.

For one, I'm very good at Spanish, but all season long I'd pretend I didn't understand anything other than the most basic terms. I wouldn't give fake translations or anything, I'd just pretend I didn't understand.

Episode 1
Over the Falls: I'd miss my bag on purpose, though I'd make sure to make it look like I was going for it. This wouldn't be hard, as I am a wee little thing. If I could somehow find out my bag had fake money in it, I'd genuinely try to catch it.
Robinson Crusoe: I'd hope to be a Scavenger and then, would bring back items I knew to be incorrect, though not blatantly so (IE, I'd bring back the antique camera and the bowler hat, but not the hairdryer). If I were a Timekeeper, I'd wear out early. If I were an Appraiser, uh... I'm sure I'd find some way to do something.

Episode 2
Race to the Summit: I'd volunteer to be on the soccer team and play hard at soccer to throw suspicion off, but not score. Then, I'd make up that there was a "shortcut" after we got the gondola tickets and map and get lost.
When Pigs Fly: I'd lay low and let the others collect pigs for me. Then, I'd insist my team go back early and take one of the sides of the slingshot, but suck at it.

Episode 3
Fruit of the Luge: I'd be blindfolded and start chanting the order of fruits after the finish line, causing me to be disqualified. When asked, I'd claim I didn't know we'd passed the finish line.
Dress Code: Once again, I'd pretend I didn't know Spanish and let the others in my group do the work for me. Hopefully, I'd get to pair up with the group's most suspected person. I'd get overly frustrated at one point, to bring the team's morale down. If we quit, I'd blame the other person.

Episode 4
Midas Rush: I'd carry a minimal number of bricks and, if my team got to the top first, try to argue over the exemption.
Who Said That: I wouldn't sabotage.
Journal Burn: I wouldn't volunteer my journal to be given up, but if anyone reacted like Mark, I'd be like "oh my God, how dramatic. No one's that into the game..."

Episode 5
All for One: I'd go out early and hope the group self-destructs, leading someone else to take the exemption and put suspicion on them.
Travelers: I wouldn't say "exemption" at breakfast, but I'd find some way to get my team lost/stalled so we wouldn't make it to the statue on time.

Episode 6
Grapes of Cache: I'd be a Thinker and make sure to answer at least two questions correctly, but also get two questions wrong.
Swing Out: I wouldn't sabotage.

Episode 7
Go Figure: I'd be unhelpful in answering the questions and run my team in the wrong direction.
Ticket to Ride: I wouldn't sabotage.

Episode 8
How's the View: I'd be a "kid at heart" and perform well at the lower-level money tasks, but whiff it on the soccer balls and plank-crossing, then blame whoever controlled the camera for me.
Cell Out: I'd make sure to solve the doublet after at least one person was done with it and let myself get caught, but wouldn't be in the cell with the exemption just to keep things fair.

Episode 9
Tick Tock Boom: I'd point out the hidden map and the big clock in the middle of the room, then be useless for the rest of the challenge.
Three to Tango: I'd dawdle so another player would win the race, in the hopes they'd take the dossier and throw suspicion on themselves.

More Office spoilers. Yayyyy!!!

They're filming at USC, which is filling in for Pratt. Which means Pam goes. Yay? I still think her art sucks. John Krasinski was spotted there as well, which means he visits her. Wheee! Summer '08 RingWatch begins... NOW.

The lovely Angela Kinsey also says there will be "complications" in the Dwangelandy relationship. No, really?

dear Mamma Mia,

Why do you keep advertising? Yes, The Dark Knight has a ridiculous amount of media coverage, but its advertising, compared to yours, was low-key. Jesus.

The Mole, 8/5

Widget clue #9: 7..26..52
On July 26, 1952, Eva Peron, beloved first lady of Argentina, died. Craig had to visit her grave. Hmmmm.

Text clue #9: MAP REC
Nicole had a shirt on that said CAMPER. MAP REC is obviously CAMPER scrambled, so it points to her being the Mole's final victim.

Overall, I just gotta say that I love Mark. He's a barrel of wonderful. He's kind and considerate, smart, hysterically funny, determined, super athletic... okay, I'll stop before I sound even creepier. At times (okay, a lot) he's borderline psychotic, yes, but that only makes me more amused by him. Basically, he's a wonderful character and a wonderful person, which is way too rare, especially on reality TV. Other notes:

- Jon stole my "Paul-free" joke!!!!
- It was soooo satisfying to hear that WHAM! and get the giant red EXECUTED over Paul's face at long long last.
- Craig: "I'm in the final three. AND PAUL'S NOT!!!!"
- Right before one of the early commercials, did anyone else hear a weird noise that sounded like someone saying something but super sped up, or maybe super sped up and backwards? I'm not going near any forums because I know it probably says "_____ IS THE MOLE" and I don't want it spoiled that way.
- Other possible clues? Jon mentioned going past the $400000 "mark" a few times, but if that's a clue... laaaame. When I was a BillFOMO, I was so very disappointed with the dollar BILLs as clues. In Tick Tock Boom, they spent a while focusing on the letter C at one point, and no other letters seemed to get that treatment. C for Craig? When Mark was looking through the Mole's dossier, you could see the name NICOLE, but I don't think the dossier had "___ IS THE MOLE" written in it. It probably had an array of clues/sabotage information for every player. Some are saying they saw a picture of Craig in there, too. So, who knows. A stupid Nicole clue could be something along the lines of that she said she was a poet (wha?), and hey, Nicole... Mole... ;) Craig also said his life goal was to own his own business, and in the Mole's journal on ABC's official site, the Mole says his/her life goal is "to own their [sic, probably on purpose to cover the Mole's identity] own business." So, another hmmm on that one. But I think the journal is probably full of lies and clues toward every player, including the executed ones, so I don't take anything that's there as cold hard fact.
- Tick Tock Boom was awesome, but so hard. It's why I would suck (or, depending on how you look at it, possibly rock?) at this show. I'd just stand there going "duh?" and everyone would say, "Wow, that [Justine Credible] was being really useless. She's gotta be the Mole!" when in fact I'm just super dumb.
- Oh, Nicole. She was just so... Nicole during that episode. I feel like I should be annoyed with her, but I'm just not. The millions of pictures by the obelisk not quite understanding that leg of the mission! The trying to pass hot fudge off as dulce de leche! The spontaneous dancing! The being sent for in a car because she sucked so bad at Three to Tango!
- The Nicole/Jon bickering on the phone was so great. "I have Mole spies everywhere and they inform me it is hot fudge" or whatever he said was... beautiful delivery. He's such a great host. And it's his birthday today so yay!!! I loved when he was like "GET!!!!!! a flag" and the eye-rolling at her! This season's been so hilarious. I hope we get another one.......
- The second task had the most awesomely random missions. "Get someone to buy you an empinada and then take a picture with him/her."
- "Make a left at Jesus."
- I loved this edit...
Craig [confessional]: "That's the bridge I've been wanting to go to the whole time I've been here!"
CUT TO...
Mark [confessional]: "Oh man, it's that stUUUUUUUpid bridge Craig's been wanting to go to."
- Hey, Mark actually kept money out of the pot. That said, Craig's "he kept $165K out of the pot, AND THEN he took out another $75K today..." WHAT? Okay, now it's probably around $165K, but before then, no way. Plus, he kind of put an assload into the pot, which... you didn't do so much. MOLE! Oh, and Craig going on about how Mark "wasted time" in Tick Tock Boom? Uh, Craig... weren't you like, with ~30 seconds to go, questioning, "what color does red and blue make when mixed? Purple? Which one is purple? I don't know what purple looks like. Is it like green? Should I cut the green one?" Exaggeration, but you know what I mean.
- At the preview for the reunion, did it look like it took place at a BBQ? Or was that just old footage?

As for Who Is The Mole? I'm gonna have to stick with Craig for a myriad of reasons that I'm too tired to trot out right now.

If Craig's the Mole, Mark's winning. If Mark's the Mole, Craig's winning. If Nicole's the Mole, it could be either of them, which is cool, except I don't wanna see my Marky lose :(

Videos to giggle over:
The showmance lives! (ooh, she kisses his guitar pick!)
I love Mark and his strange eating habits. They can't say "Red Bull" on TV? Stuff like Taco Thursday endears him to me even more.

Six days...

Neil Patrick Harris is so much better than you.

Here's his article from Out magazine. Damn, he looks pretty hot in the pictures, too. And of course, gives us the greatest quote ever: "Mmmmmmmm. Anderson. He’s dreamy. Just dreamy. I’ve been a fan of his since season 1 of The Mole. I just thought he was so cool when he talked in this cool, low, secret-agent voice -- 'If you can accomplish this task...'"

I love you, Neil Patrick Harris.

Huh. Interesting.

Via Ausiello: Mad Men Star Poached by The Office.

Hmmm. So Anne Hathaway's sort of gay best friend from The Devil Wears Prada is gonna be on The Office. He looks like Jim's uglier brother (sorry Rich). And he's going to be part of a "surprise twist!" Ooh.

Who. Is. THE MOLE???!!!!

yes, comments tomorrow, mostly consisting of "OMG I LOVE MARK!!!"

hahahaha

The Dark Knight in its third week of release beat The Mummy 3. Hahahahah.

Relax, all.

The Office is bringing us a Halloween and a Christmas episode this year. :D Okay, the only reason we didn't get a Christmas episode last year was because of the... the... you know. I don't want to say the word, for fear we'll get another one. The, uh, the... (averts eyes, sotto voce) str*ke. SHHHH!!!!!! DON'T REPEAT IT!!!!

a little different.

Do you think Michael will still like Holly when he finds out about her superskanky sister?

American Pie?

Seems really, really, really, really super dumb and terrible 9 or however many years later. Jason Biggs and Chris Klein have all the charisma of wet socks. Eugene Levy is like a terrible Steve Carell. Natasha Lyonne faking having an orgasm makes my ears bleed with how horrible it is. Tara Reid should probably never act ever. Alyson Hannigan just kind of sucks in general (sorry Buffy fans). Sean William Scott is not a millionth as hot as he clearly thinks he is. Etc.

Rachel Getting Married trailer.

Here.

Anne Hathaway looks... pretty good? Can it be?

I'm a straight girl, but...

^ I feel dirty for putting that picture there

Salma Hayek really isn't that hot, right? Like, she just has gigantic boobs and that's kind of it? I mean, she seems pretty spunky and intelligent, but I just don't see the hotness.

...aaaand I go right back to TV posts.

I love The Mole.

Jon Kelley: "Diffuse this bomb." (walks out)

OH HEY LOOK CRAIG AND NICOLE WASTING TIME AT THE VERY LAST MINUTE AGAIN.

once upon a time,

this blog was a movie blog. Remember those days? Ooooops. I suck. :(