slowly, with passion, straight at the camera.: February 2009

Friday, February 27, 2009

Errr, yeah, about that Oscar post.

Ummm, not sure it's coming until the end of next week-ish... which is bad because this seems to have been an Oscars that everyone forgot all about spectacularly quickly. Oh well.

Kate Winslet still has an Oscar. Hosea is still the winner of Top Chef. So, you know, life's good.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

LMAO.

So, Tina Fey = Sarah Palin. We all know this.

After last night's embarrassing counter-speech to Obama's, Bobby Jindal and his adorable little Southern accent and general attitude have given off the impression that he is much like similarly adorable Kenneth the Page. Jack Donaghy is already like any given Republican, so...

Republican primary in 2012 = any given episode of 30 Rock. This will be so awesome.

Also, words cannot express my delight that Chris Matthews audibly sighed "oh God" as Jindal walked out. I secretly (well, maybe not so much now haha) love Chris Matthews SO MUCH. He's like some little kid who ate way too much candy and JUST CAN'T KEEP HIS EXCITEMENT AND FEELINGS TO HIMSELF, OKAY?!!!!!!

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

OMFG YES.

So lately I've been mentally crying out "JAI HOOOOOO!!!!" in response to anything great that happens because goddamn, I love that song (and I really need to see that movie!). And now, let me amend that...

jai hoooooooooSEAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! (this is better than the NOsea I am expecting to see everywhere and already have at Amuse-Biatch, which is amazing.)

I'm the only person on the internet that is excited, nay thrilled, about this!

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

RDJ, why so hot bb?

Oh man, seriously. And yes, Heath deserved the Oscar this year, but you're getting yours soon, babe.

Monday, February 23, 2009

No, last one. I swear.

Every time I see this photo or one in this group with the three of them being adorable (I think Sean Penn really did channel the true Harvey Milk... he's been so frankly sweet and charming this whole awards season, as opposed to "XCUSE ME SIR JUDE LAW IS ONE OF OUR FINEST ACTORS AHEM"), I think for a second, "Oh, what, was the winner of Best Supporting Actor too ~busy~ to pose for an adorable 'Oscar winners' photo?" And then I remember and feel like a horrible, horrible person. Which I am.

Oh, one final note before the main Oscar deluge:

Reese... what the fuck is this shit? This dress is totally disastrous and you usually look a billion percent awesome. Ugh, you've even got crazy-ass eyes to go along with this getup. And I think the eyes give it away: clearly this isn't actually Reese Witherspoon, but like, her evil twin who decided to smear her good name in the fashion world and run away with Jake Gyllenhaal. Poor Reese, tied up in a closet somewhere, never saw it coming.

Technical difficulties (not really).

So it's going to be an excessively busy week for me, and I don't really have time to cover the Oscars in as much depth as I'd like until the end of the week. So I promise I will get to them, but it will more than likely be, like, Friday afternoon, when no one cares any more. Oh well. ;_;

I will leave you with a picture of oompa loompa doompity dawesome:

I LOVE THIS. Except Meryl, girl, I love you, but give it back to its rightful owner this year.

Oh, and

Yes, Anne, this was adorable. I will continue to irrationally dislike you (well, actually, it's not irrational, I find you completely annoying and like a twit personality-wise, and a completely untalented actress. Yes, you were fine in Rachel Getting Married and I don't begrudge your acting, but if that role was played by an actress it was trendy to dislike as opposed to one it's trendy to like - like Natalie Portman or Scarlett Johansson - I wonder how it would have been reviewed). Hugh Jackman, you get a B-. You tried - and goddamn it you freakin' smoldered with your hotness - but sorry, I just need some snarky-ass Jon Stewart jokes to get me through the ceremony. It didn't help that you were part of the most upset-less Oscar ceremony in, like, years. Oh, and speaking of hosting...

Tina, you looked AMAAAAAZING (see what happens when you don't wear boring-ass black for once?!) and yes, you were the best presenter along with Steve Martin. But oh my God, people, people, people, she does not need to host next year!!! Like Tina isn't already hyped enough by the media.

Judd Apatow, congrats, that short about the comedies of 2008 was the best thing you've done so far. Hilarious.

You'll get the rest of my snark on Friday or so...

oh, and by the way

19/24.

Either I was really ON or the awards were incredibly predictable. Um, I'm going with the latter.

Kate WINSlet.

And thank God for that!

More tomorrow. Yeesh that was a boring ceremony. There's hardly anything to snark on. ;_;

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Probably not for real, but...

Here's an article about the "leaked" Oscar winners, and it's got the supposed leaked list.

I don't believe this for a second, but if those were the results, I wouldn't mind at all. I didn't like Amy Adams at ALL in Doubt, but I can just pretend it's for Enchanted and possibly giggle at the undoubtedly sour look that will pop up on Penelope's face. In Bruges winning Best Original Screenplay would be like, the greatest thing ever, next to KATE WINNING! So, I do hope it's true, but the chances are like 99% that it's not.

Friday, February 20, 2009

More thoughts on the ANTM Cycle 12 girls...

Because here are their videos.

Allison
She seems super sweet and super shy too. Hopefully she's not Marjorie, though, because oh my God one season of that was enough. Her interest in photography makes her not just some boring generic girl. I like her a lot.

Aminat
The pictures first came out and I loved her. Then I saw her pre-show pics and they were MEH and my love subsided. And now, the more video comes out of her, the more I love her again. She seems like she has a great, fun, distinct personality. She's confident but not cocky. I think she'll photograph really interestingly. And she really does look like Danielle in action. I hope they don't shave her head, I hope they make her fro BIGGER, LOL.

Celia
She still looks super old and her face is almost a little scary and skull-like, but I like her. I think she has a brain. Her Kentucky explanation was hysterical, and I love that Annie Hall is her favorite movie. Something about her says HUGE SECRET BITCH though, and you know what? I like her even more because of that! I just hope she photographs well...

Fo
She is cute as all hell, and probably actually one of the prettiest girls that's ever been on ANTM. I didn't like her lame "I wanted to be on ANTM because I didn't want to go through agencies or EXERT EFFORT to become a model" thing, though. Eh, she's a little boring, but like I said, she's got a really cute, sweet way about her, and she's super pretty.

Isabella
HOLY EYELINER BATMAN. But seriously she is so freaking cute though and looks a lot better in motion than in that one promo photo. I don't see fakeness, like some are claiming, but I do have to see her on the show I guess. Some people are just enthusiastic, like Analeigh. I love her Starbucks love. I do wish she'd shut up about the goddamn raspberries already.

Jessica
I'm nearly fluent in Spanish but my accent BLOWS so I'm super jealous of her adorable and fantastic accent. I loooove how she says El Cantante. She strikes me as entertainingly cocky, but still kind of boring. Like Isabella needs to shut up about raspberries, she needs to shut up about sushi.

Kortnie
She's orange, but my God she is soooo pretty. Oh, and how the hell is she plus-size, I still don't get that. She's like, too big to be some HF model, I'll give you that, but there's no way she's anywhere close to even Sarah C9 size. She's just got enormous boobs. Whatever, I love her personality. I hope she's as fun as she seems here. I love what she says about Wet Hot American Summer; I think the entire point is that it sounds like a porn!

London
She needs to stop screaming at me and she seems a little crazy, but I dunno, I like her more now. She's pretty in motion. But why the hell does she go on and on and on and on about being curvy? Girl, you know that's reserved for the plus-size chicks. I like that she's religious and cool, because I think religious people get a really bad rap, especially in the media. Hopefully she's tolerant and whatnot. Oh, and PALE ITALIAN MUTTS UNITE!!

Natalie
She pretty. She no have much of a personality. So, who knows. Also, when it comes to Holocaust stuff, Schindler's List owns The Pianist, bitch. ;)

Nijah
I adore her top and I think she's really pretty and cute and charming, but she seems boring as all heck. There's always a generic white girl, and there's usually a generic black girl, and I think she's that generic black girl.

Sandra
Apparently spoilers say she's a BITCH, but I don't see that at all. If anything, I see a girl that's boring as all heck, though I do love her accent. I mean, her background is interesting, but she's just like... SWAHILI!!!!!! I LOVE LOVE LOVE that two girls are from Africa, though. Her face and body looks amazingly modelesque, but she's got CRAZY EYES.

Tahlia
She's sooooo much prettier in motion than she is in photos. And yes, we know you're courageous and strong and a burn survivor, can we move on? Ah, that was insensitive of me. ._. Hopefully she is a natural model, because apparently she's never been at a photoshoot before, but I dunno...

Teyona
I dunno, she's cute and seems to be fun - I loved her talking about New Jersey - but she doesn't really stand out. I think she has the potential to be fairly editorial though. Based on her promo shot, I thought she was gonna be a HUGE BITCH, but she doesn't seem that way here at all. Yay.

So far, I actually kind of like all of them! I need to see who's gonna be super bitchy on the show and who photographs terribly to decide who I don't like, haha.

UGH.

Oh No They Didn't has the picture of Rihanna post-abuse and I looked at it and I want to throw up. I hope Chris Brown rots. I feel the need to include a picture of Rihanna being all cute and happy here, except now it only made me sadder about the whole thing. :( Like I said, I hope Chris rots, and that she gets better ASAP and maybe even becomes some sort of spokesperson against domestic abuse. Ugh, the whole thing just makes me sick to my stomach, she looks like she wants to burst out crying in that ONTD photo ;_;

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Entertainment Weekly's list of the top 50 working directors.

50. Sidney Lumet
Yes, he is badass. And should be over a LOT of these guys.

49. Mary Harron
I love that just because she's a woman her work apparently subverts the patriarchy or whatever. I'm in a women's studies class and OH MY GOD, GUYS, I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE, WHITE WOMEN WHO ARE WEALTHY ENOUGH TO MAKE FILMS AREN'T THE MOST OPPRESSED PEOPLE IN THE WORLD CAN WE MOVE ON????? ahem

48. Michael Moore
He's an absolute beyond obnoxious asshole........ and he's generally right as all hell. His movies are very strong.

47. Andrew Stanton
Well seeing as he's made, like, ALL my favorite movies, yes. I just never know who's really in charge of what in an animated movie, stupid as that might sound.

46. Mira Nair
Her work is beautiful, but often doesn't do all that much for me. I feel very underinformed about the Indian culture, though.

45. Wes Anderson
Sometimes he's great. Sometimes he's crap. I'll always love him for having a man-crush on Bill Murray and constantly keeping him employed, though.

44. Wong Kar-Wai
OMG MAKE HIM HIGHER NOWWWWW

43. David Lynch
Eh. He's very overrated, but I can't deny how much I love Blue Velvet. Oh, and Lost Highway formed a cult? Mulholland Dr. was a masterpiece? See, EW, this is why I call him overrated.

42. Spike Lee
HELL YES. Not always great, not always even good, but when he's on, this guy is on. And he's on quite a bit. He should be much higher.

41. Richard Linklater
Very uneven.

40. Spike Jonze
So weird. I do like some of his movies a whole lot, though.

39. Roman Polanski
There is no denying he is a legend, but his work lately has been meh.

38. Oliver Stone
Sometimes I love him and sometimes I want to punch him in the jaw. Oooh, I really need to see W.

37. Mike Leigh
Love him, even if Happy-Go-Lucky and Sally Hawkins' performance in it were huge disappointments. His methods of working are just great, and he looks like a cuddly uncle.

36. Hayao Miyazaki
Uh, yeah. He's basically flawless. He and Pixar should just make every animated movie and nobody else should even bother.

35. Alfonso Cuaron
A little too technical, a little overpraised, but still very good.

34. JJ Abrams
I haven't seen a whole lot of what he's done, because it's mostly TV stuff, but yeah, he is extraordinarily influential with a huge fanbase.

33. Wachowski brothers
No. =/ Hated The Matrix, all of them.

32. Mel Gibson
Again, no. =/

31. Sam Mendes
I adore him, but I don't think he'll ever make a film that will live up to American Beauty. That thing is fuckin' flawless.

30. Bryan Singer
He made The Usual Suspects, which was badass and which I always forget he did. For that, I've got a lot of respect for him. I would have liked to see his take on Milk because IIRC he was originally slated to direct.

29. Sofia Coppola
I LOVE YOU RIGHT NOW EW. PLEASE MAKE HER HIGHER.

28. David Cronenberg
Eh. A History of Violence was pretty much perfect though.

27. Brad Bird
The favorite films of mine Andrew Stanton didn't make, this guy did.

26. Woody Allen
Yup. Lately he's been on a sort of creative renaissance too, which is great. He should be much higher, and beat...

25. Jon Favreau
Uh. I loved Iron Man, you loved Iron Man, we all loved Iron Man, but he does not deserve to be this high yet.

24. Pedro Almodovar
Love him, hate EW's explanation. "HURRRR HE SHOWS OFF PENELOPE'S TITS A+++!!!!"

23. Paul Greengrass
He really is a very good director, but I can't say I LOVE any of his films.

22. Paul Thomas Anderson
YES HIGHER PLZ KTHNXBYEEEEE

21. Ang Lee
He is such an asshole, as I have whined about before, but yes, an excellent director.

20. Ron Howard
His movies are usually good but not GREAT. I don't think he deserves a Best Director Oscar, but I did loooove Apollo 13.

19. Clint Eastwood
Like him, don't love him. I don't get the Academy's hard-on for him, or the bloggers' hate-on for him.

18. Danny Boyle
LOOK GUISE SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE WE ARE TRENDY. He's a good director, but not this good.

17. Darren Aronofsky

YES. Also, EW, you morons, you weren't sure he was concerned with human beings until The Wrestler? Did you see The Fountain or Requiem for a Dream? Idiots.

16. Zack Snyder

Well... I'll always appreciate that he made the cheesefest that is 300.

15. Sam Raimi

Yes, though probably not this high. And stop hating on Spider-Man 3!

14. Judd Apatow

Oh, I was wondering when he was going to show up. Seeing how this is EW, I think we should all be happy he's not in the top ten... get off his cock, Entertainment Weekly. And yes, when it comes to EW and Judd Apatow, I will always say the crudest thing possible. I think it's what Judd would want.

13. Tim Burton

He's not really my kind of director to be honest but he's prolific and he's made some very good films. I just think he's overrated and shouldn't be this high.

12. David Fincher

Yes. Of course, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is like his worst film, and the one he gets an Oscar nomination for, because that's how these things work.

11. Guillermo del Toro

He shouldn't be this high. He's very inventive, but that's... about... it.

10. Joel & Ethan Coen

Ugh, I love them. For some reason, they get misanthropy and dark comedy SO PERFECT.

9. James Cameron

Ummmmm... maybe. Definitely not top ten in my world.

8. Michael Mann

OHHHH MAN, I LOVE YOU FOR THIS ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY. Well, except Miami Vice. Man, that movie was bad, and all the people trying to justify it were even worse. People, there are better ways to subvert stupid ass summer movies than by MAKING THEM SUPER BORING.

7. Quentin Tarantino

Yes. He can basically do no wrong in my book.

6. Ridley Scott

In the past, maybe, but he's been in such a slump lately, unfortunately. I do need to see Body of Lies and judge for myself.

5. Steven Soderbergh

I LOOOOVE how he effortlessly moves between genres, from summer blockbusters to typical Oscarbait to weird-ass crap. Certainly one of the most important and yes, probably best directors of our time.

4. Christopher Nolan

Heck yes. I'm not exactly a fangirl, but I love how he subverts mainstream films and makes them thirty times more interesting. Like, Michael-Mann-directing-Miami-Vice, you need to learn from this guy.

3. Martin Scorsese

Why is he not #1? Look, I love Spielberg and like Jackson, but there's really no excuse.

2. Peter Jackson

I like him, but don't ZOMGLOTRLOOOOVE him.

1. Steven Spielberg

I'd put him more in the top five than #1 itself, but yeah, there's no doubt he has a very strong ouevre. And I think he's badass and really like him.

NOOOOOO!!!!!!

NOT MY BB FABIO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm gonna say it, and yes I'm the only one that wants this: HOSEA FTW!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

FINAL OSCAR PREDIX, AAAAOOOGAH!

Yeah. I reserve the right to change any of these until Sunday night. And a lot of this is me guessing, especially on the documentary shorts and whatnot, hahah.

BEST PICTURE: Slumdog Millionaire (alt. Milk)
BEST DIRECTOR: Danny Boyle (alt. David Fincher)
BEST ACTOR: Mickey Rourke (alt. Sean Penn)
BEST ACTRESS: Kate Winslet (alt. Meryl Streep)
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR: Heath Ledger (alt. Philip Seymour Hoffman)
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS: Penelope Cruz (alt. Viola Davis)
BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY: Milk (alt. Wall-E)
BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY: Slumdog Millionaire (alt. The Reader)
BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY: The Reader (alt. Slumdog Millionaire)
BEST EDITING: Slumdog Millionaire (alt. Milk)
BEST ART DIRECTION: The Curious Case... (alt. Changeling)
BEST COSTUME DESIGN: The Duchess (alt. The Curious Case...)
BEST MAKEUP: The Curious Case... (alt. The Dark Knight)
BEST ORIGINAL SCORE: Slumdog Millionaire (alt. The Curious Case...)
BEST ORIGINAL SONG: "Jai Ho" (alt. "Down to Earth")
BEST SOUND: Slumdog Millionaire (alt. The Dark Knight)
BEST SOUND EDITING: The Dark Knight (alt. Slumdog Millionaire)
BEST VISUAL EFFECTS: The Curious Case... (alt. The Dark Knight)
BEST ANIMATED FILM: Wall-E (alt. Kung Fu Panda)
BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM: Waltz with Bashir (alt. The Class)
BEST DOCUMENTARY: Man on Wire (alt. Trouble the Water)
BEST DOCUMENTARY SHORT: The Conscience of Nhem En (alt. The Final Inch)
BEST SHORT FILM, ANIMATED: Presto (alt. Oktapodi)
BEST SHORT FILM, LIVE ACTION: Toyland (alt. The Pig)

Whew. We'll see how well I did late Sunday night or Monday morning/afternoon, depending on how busy I am :)

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

I don't think I mentioned it but...

This guy is going to be on The Office for a bunch of episodes in the spring, playing whoever is in Jan and Ryan's former job. Apparently he was in American Gangster, but I don't remember him... and The Office sure as hell does love its Wire guest stars. I'm hoping Stringer Bell can be half as awesome as Beadie Russell was... ooh, and I wonder if he's gonna keep his British accent? Probably not.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Major Oscar predix.

I reserve the right to change these up to the ceremony. :P

Best Picture
Slumdog Millionaire
It's got all the hype and many of the precursors. Barring some huge upset, it's got this in the bag. The Curious Case... will continue its trend of being nominated for tons of big things but winning none of those big things.
Alternate: Milk
I've seen/Should win, with my limited viewings in mind: Milk, The Curious Case... (yes, I watched it online a little while ago, and OMG SOOOO BORING and just... not right at all, tonally), and The Reader / Milk
Snubbed: Wall-E

Best Director
Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire
See above.
Alternate: David Fincher
I've seen/Should win: Daldry, Fincher, Van Sant / Van Sant
Snubbed: Christopher Nolan, The Dark Knight

Best Actor
Mickey Rourke, The Wrestler
It's close with him and Sean Penn. But I think, in the end, the "underdog" story will truly appeal to the voters, those saps. ;) It will be CLOSE, though.
Alternate: Sean Penn
I've seen/Should win: Penn and Pitt / PENN.
Snubbed: Robert Downey Jr., Iron Man. Not kidding.

Best Actress
Kate Winslet, The Reader
KING OF KINGS! AND LORD OF LORDS!!!!
Alternate: Meryl Streep
I've seen/Should win: Hathaway, Leo, Streep, Winslet. Whoo, almost done! / Winslet
Snubbed: Rebecca Hall or Scarlett Johansson, Vicky Cristina Barcelona. I finally saw all of Happy-Go-Lucky, and Sally Hawkins does not deserve to be in this category, sorry.

Best Supporting Actor
Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight
The only real, true lock.
Alternate: Don't need one, but PSH
I've seen/Should win: ALL OF THEM YAAAAAY / Ledger
Snubbed: Bill Irwin, Rachel Getting Married and Brad Pitt, Burn After Reading

Best Supporting Actress
Penelope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Meh? Good, nomination-worthy, but not OMG GIVE HER AN OSCAR RTM-worthy at all. At least, if they give her an Oscar now, they can get it out of the way. And ha ha, she's not going to get her boyfriend to present it to her. I hope the inane little thing cries about it and not in a good way. Wow, I'm so mean! I can still see any of the nominees here upsetting; Pene's not a huge frontrunner.
Alternate: Viola Davis, Doubt
I've seen/Should win: Adams, Cruz, Davis, Henson / Davis
Snubbed: Rosemarie DeWitt, Rachel Getting Married (though I have her in lead)

Best Original Screenplay
Milk
The film will more than likely pick up its only major award here.
Alternate: Wall-E
I've seen / Should win: ALL OF THEM YAAAAAY / Wall-E
Snubbed: Vicky Cristina Barcelona

Best Adapted Screenplay
Slumdog Millionaire
Get used to "Jai Ho," people. You're going to hear it A LOT on Oscar night when those guys go up to get their 500000 trophies.
Alternate: The Reader
I've seen / Should win: The Curious Case..., Doubt, The Reader / out of those, um, The Reader I guess
Snubbed: Revolutionary Road

Those were my long predictions for the major categories... I'll have a full list up in a few days.

Oh. My. God.

This is a young Mike Huckabee. And he's SERIOUSLY HOT. WHAT THE HELL. Joe Biden was also super super super suave and good-looking, but... but... but... the most disturbing thing of all... possibly ever...

What the hell, DICK CHENEY WAS HOT! AAAHHH!!!! At least he had the "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU" look in his eyes, even back then.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

SNL last night.

I actually missed it, but I've been hearing about how terrible it was from everyone, including my dad, who thinks the show is "still brilliant." When my dad acknowledges an episode is terrible, and Alec Baldwin can't save it, you KNOW it's bad.

The only good thing that would have resulted from McCain/Palin being elected was that Saturday Night Live would have stayed as funny as it was during the election.

Friday, February 13, 2009

I saw Revolutionary Road, whee!

How long until the Republicans claim it's one of the top ten conservative movies of all time because April dies due to a botched abortion?

It was okay. It packed a hell of a punch, but parts were unintentionally funny (maybe intentional to lessen the tension?). Mendes' American Beauty was like that, but at the end of American Beauty, I absolutely got the feeling that this was a movie that loved life. Revolutionary Road, um, not so much. Kate was as fantastic as she usually is, even with dialogue that was at times stifled and motivational-speaker-y, especially at the beginning of the movie, but I found Leo completely unbelievable, sad to say. He was shockingly bad at the beginning of the movie, specifically, because he just seemed to go into "DOUCHE" mode and hit that note over and over again. Michael Shannon shocked me with how much his character was like the Joker, though he didn't leave me flabbergasted like Heath.

I did like it more than I seem to indicate here. B or so?

And now I have some homework to do. On a Friday night, I know. BOOOOOOO

Ryan started the fire.

I love this:

The "Top Twenty-Five Conservative Films of the Past Twenty-Five Years"

Here. Offers further proof that conservatives are seriously insane in the membrane. Here's the list, and my thoughts on it...

25. Gran Torino
I haven't seen it, but I'm guessing that because the plot appears to be Heroic White Man Saves Brown People From Themselves, yes, probably Republican ideology.

24. Team America: World Police
Ummmmmm. Yes, the liberals of Hollywood get made fun of, but so do ridiculous neocons. So does everyone. That's kind of the point. Did you miss that it's called Team America: World Police? Did you miss "America, Fuck Yeah", for God's sake?!

23. United 93
Reasoning? "Because the terrorists were portrayed as bad guys." We liberals just love terrorists, obviously, especially the ones that attacked America on 9/11. Fuck you in the ear, you guys, seriously. And by "you guys" I mean "the people who wrote this list" and "those terrorists," by the way.

22. Brazil
Um... WUT. IIRC their reasoning for this is totally ridiculous and basically criticizes the Bush/Cheney years. What in the holy hell.

21. Heartbreak Ridge
Never heard of it.

20. Gattaca
I've seen it, but I don't remember this one.

19. We Were Soldiers
Never saw it. It probably shows war as ~perfect~ or something, though.

18. The Edge
Never heard of it.

17. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe
No arguments from me, actually. It's pretty blatant Christian allegory which I suppose is conservative.

16. Master and Commander
Because... they have war and stuff? I guess.

15. Red Dawn
Haven't seen it.

14. A Simple Plan
I saw it a long time ago, and I can't imagine how this is conservative. Wonkette needs to post all these write-ups right now so I can keep laughing at them.

13. Braveheart
It's Mel Gibson, so yes, it's probably conservative. The last time I saw it was junior year of high school and I absolutely despised it, so I have no desire to return to this one.

12. The Dark Knight
um... NO. Yes, Batman relies on increased surveillance (part of the reason why they claim The Lives of Others and Brazil are apparently conservative is because they're AGAINST increased surveillance though!) and terrible torture methods, but did they miss the part where these techniques failed miserably and he destroyed the super-surveillance thing at the end? Duh-duh-duh-duh-dumb.

11. The Lord of the Rings trilogy
Again, um... NO. I'm pretty sure Peter Jackson and Viggo Mortensen had interviews where they described how the Eye of Sauron represented Bush and whatnot. I'd go into more detail, but really my mind is spotty when I come to LotR trivia. I might be a geek, but I'm not that big a geek.

10. Ghostbusters
What the fuck? Apparently it's because the bad guy works for a regulatory agency or something, but still. What the fuck?

9. Blast from the Past
Never heard of it.

8. Juno
LOLZ. Because she keeps the baby and there's a pro-life protestor outside the clinic (who comes off as stupid). Yes, she keeps the baby, and she chooses to keep it after having pre-marital sex and then, at the end, she gives it to an unwed mother, which we all know, according to Ann Coulter, are the source of all horrible things on Earth or something. No. Stop trying to make Juno into Bristol, conservatives.

7. The Pursuit of Happyness
Because the guy pulls himself up by the bootstraps, I guess. Awww, see, that's what the Republicans think... if one negro can do it, they all can!

6. Groundhog Day
...what? This makes even less sense than Ghostbusters. Also, I guess Harold Ramis is a conservative filmmaker? Um... right.

5. 300
LOfuckingL. I knew this ludicrously homoerotic film would be on here. Seriously, why the hell was it even made other than to be like, "GAAAAYYYY!!!" I guess they portray war as something GREAT!!!!! so it's conservative, but this proves, once and for all, that conservatives have virtually zero sense of humor.

4. Forrest Gump
Um... I guess. I know a lot of film snobs are all like "OMG REPUBLICAN VALUES, THIS FILM SUCKS SO MUCH BLARG BLARG," but maybe not (even if it was true, that wouldn't be a reason to dismiss the film). I think these people project a lot. You could say a very liberal lifestyle is what destroys Jenny, but a very conservative lifestyle destroys Lt. Dan. Ugh, I can't remember the rest, but there were other things to prove that it's more liberal than it is conservative.

3. Metropolitan
Never saw it.

2. The Incredibles
...huh? I've heard some people think there's Randian stuff in here, or something, or they think the villain is a Socialist/Communist because he wants everyone to have superpowers (right?), but... I just... no...

1. The Lives of Others
I think I saw the write-up for this one and it's basically a joke. They decry everything that happened in the Bush presidency. I give up on these people. But you let me keep my Lives of Others, Republicans. It's a really good movie and it's all subtle and OMG SUBTITLED!!! FURRENERS!!!! so you wouldn't want it anyway.

What really irritates me is that the conservatives are always like WAAAH LIBRUL MEEEEEDIA!!! and then they claim the biggest films of the past few years, such as Lord of the Rings and The Dark Knight, are conservative. You can't have it both ways, morans (that's a pro-war demonstrator, of course). Oh, and this list is only from the past twenty-five years because they didn't want to have to explain to their base why Birth of a Nation isn't on there. Big eye-roll.

And now, it's sleepytimes.

"Lecture Circuit, Part Two" was not as good as the first half, but it was still quite good. I think it'll hold up better on rewatch when it's one episode on the DVD. I like that Jim was all irritated and super cranky, probably because Pam wasn't there (and he was dealing with Dwight). The Angela sideplot was fucking bizarre, but the birthday one was hilarious. "This is your birthday." is never going to stop being funny, especially compared with Dwight's ludicrously girly sign that he made in this half. Oh, and I LOVE THESE TWO TOGETHER (not together together, GOD NO, but you know what I mean).:

As a final note, it's nice to see Pam wanting to get back against all those people that keep talking shit about her this season.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

I just found out

this chick from the latest season of Survivor (which, yes, I will be watching in about an hour or so) is Beloved Mark's former student!!! I know who I'm rooting for, I guess.

Also, I read Mark's old posts over on Survivor Sucks and OMG he's like "Obama needs more infrastructure and to spend more money, not give in to the tax cut stuff" YAY I LOVE HIM EVEN MORE NOW.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Yay, Kate!!!!

I don't know how I missed this article.

I'm not a lesbian, but I sure as hell agree with them here. My only problem with Kate is that she looks way older than she is; I find it hard to believe she's only 33, but part of that is the fact that she's been around, giving amazing performances, for fifteen years. Oh, and here is my random listing of her performances that I've seen:

1. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

2. Heavenly Creatures

3. The Reader

4. Holy Smoke!

5. Iris

6. Little Children

7. Sense and Sensibility

8. Hamlet

9. Jude

10. Quills
11. Hideous Kinky

12. Romance and Cigarettes

13. The Holiday

14. Finding Neverland

15. Titanic

16. All the King's Men

17. The Life of David Gale

I f'love her! Seriously, she was fucking amazing in The Reader, people are just whining that it's a "make-up" award because it's a Holocaust movie and because she's finally going to win. And I really need to see Revolutionary Road ._.

Make Me A Supermodel, S2.

That's one of Gabriel's pre-show photos and a screencap from the casting special of Colin. Oh yeah, I think I'll be watching this season, or at least making an effort to catch it on YouTube...

Independent Spirit Awards Predix

Here are this year's nominees. If the order of this list seems weird, I'm just going by that.

Best Supporting Actress: Rosemarie DeWitt in Rachel Getting Married. I think Penelope might be a little too mainstream-y for them here, and they always like showing how ~~edgy~~ (but not really because they are totally predictable) they are.

Best Supporting Actor: James Franco in Milk. Like I said... they're ~~edgy~~, but they're not that edgy.

Best Director: Jonathan Demme for Rachel Getting Married. I think it's going to clean up and that's actually kind of unfortunate, because the film furthers some of the worst "stereotypes" about tiny indie movies. Alternatively, Courtney Hunt could win for Frozen River so they could be like, "Look! We gave the award to a girl!!! We are so ~~edgy~~!!!!!!!!"

Best Screenplay: Vicky Cristina Barcelona. The only other one I could see upsetting here is Synecdoche, New York.

Best First Screenplay: Milk. This was a tough call. I wouldn't be surprised if Rachel Getting Married won this, because it is indie and pretentious, and by a girl. Maybe Frozen River too.

There are a lot of other categories I don't really care about, so blah blah blah...

Best First Feature: Synecdoche, New York. Are you kidding? It's Charlie Kaufman. The ISAs may be ~~edgy~~ but who the heck has heard of any of these other movies?

Best Actor: Sean Penn in Milk. I think this group is going to love the hell out of Milk.

Best Actress: I can't tell if Anne Hathaway in Rachel Getting Married is ~~edgy~~ enough for them. I mean, the film is ~~edgy~~ in the way that the ISAs are, but Anne Hathaway is OMG famous. I think I'll predict Melissa Leo in Frozen River here, but wouldn't be surprised with either woman.

Best Picture: Rachel Getting Married, meh. I hope there's an upset here.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

I meant to do this a lot earlier, but whatevs.

The Top 10 Office Episodes of 2008, because S4 and S5 rocked. SUCK IT, HATERS.

10. "Baby Shower" (October 16)
I still don't hate Jan and I'm not totally sure why everyone does. Every relationship in this episode was so sweet, and yet it wasn't overdone in a way where it felt like the episode was about relationships, and not the office. If the fandom of The Office was interested in anything other than JAM, that Michael/Holly hug would get the recognition it should. Melora is annoying on the DVDs, yes, but I still think she plays Jan very well.

9. "Did I Stutter?" (May 1)
Very funny, with a lot of drama too. Pam wearing those glasses was absolutely priceless. Oh, and I still find myself saying, way more than I should, "A stupid, idiotic numbskull named Andy Bernard sold his XTerra..." It might be my favorite talking head of all time, even surpassing the one Michael has at the beginning of "The Injury."

8. "Customer Survey" (November 6)
This is one of those simple but great episodes. It's consistently hilarious and yet still crushes your heart with that scene at the end. Jim and Dwight together is almost never wrong. I don't think Jim should be pranking so much nowadays - and I think the writers have indicated that - but the relationship between those two is just hilarious and awesome.

7. "Crime Aid" (October 23)
Minus the weak excuse to get Roy back, this episode was really great, mostly for the way it focused on Michael and Holly's relationship. Ugh, those two were meant to be. Plus, for those of us that like to whine about how we never saw JAM dating at the beginning, they work as a pretty darn good proxy. Oh, and Michael getting Pam a job at Corporate in NY was just adorable, I'm sorry. Like Dwight and Jim, those two have a great relationship.

6. "Business Trip" (November 13)
The A-plot was both hilarious and heartbreaking, as this show manages to do so often. Michael thinking that a concierge is like a geisha cracks me up. Jim and Pam made something good happen in the Parking Lot of Doom, and it was awesome... and I love how they resolved that plot after putting us through hell with it LOL. I do have to say, though, that what pushes this episode over the top for me is the Ryan/Kelly subplot. OH MY GOD, I COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING. I never really cared about those two except for their deleted scenes in "A Benihana Christmas," but that was like, the best and funniest they'd ever been. I hated Ryan SO MUCH in S4 (see #9 on this list, heh), but I LOVED him in S5. I hope he comes back just as funny.

5. "Goodbye Toby" (May 15)
No, I'm not crazy about the last seven or so minutes, either, but before that, the episode is great. Amy Ryan is frigging amazing and I'm sad she's gone but, well, you know, she's a busy lady and I'm sure she'll be back. Ryan getting caught on YouTube never stops being funny for some reason, but most importantly, this episode has the greatest B-plot ever, with Holly thinking Kevin is retarded. It's amazing. Also, I know everyone likes to kvetch about the not!proposal with JAM at the end, and well, who can blame 'em, but I think a lot of people forget that we got a ton of amazing JAM moments throughout the episode.

4. "Dinner Party" (April 10)
I kind of get the impression you either love this one or you hate it. While it doesn't really adhere to the Office formula, it's just an amazingly funny episode. The writing is awesome, and it's like a top... five? ten? Pam episode ever. Some people are right, this episode would have never taken place in S2. AND THAT'S NOT A BAD THING! That one night... you made everything alri-i-i-ght!

3. "The Surplus" (December 4)
I haven't laughed this much at an Office episode in a long, long, long, long, long time. And that's saying a lot, because it's The Office. Seriously, this episode was just fucking hysterical. This show knows how to do broad. Oh, I can hear the "I watched in S2 I'm so cool" people complaining from here, but whatevs.

2. "Chair Model" (April 17)
I'm sorry, this episode made me squee and squeal and cry like a girl like no other. I FELL OFF A CHAIR BECAUSE OF IT!!!! The entirety of the day after this was on I was like :D :D :D :D :D because I'm kind of pathetic like that. It helps that it's really funny too. I could rewatch this every day, I swear.

1. "Weight Loss" (September 25)
This episode is flawless. Top 5 ever. Yeah, me writing about this episode will just turn into a loon spewing praise every which way, so.

BTW, both "Stress Relief" and "Lecture Circuit, Part One" would be on here if they were 2008. I fully expect them to show up on the 2009 list, though hopefully there will be even better episodes. :D

sigh

The fact that Quentin Tarantino's new movie is called Inglourious Basterds is going to drive me completely insane. Really, even people in England, is that correct?

Also, Brad Pitt + Quentin Tarantino = ... (crickets chirp...) I dunno, they don't seem like their style would... mesh.

This movie better be good if it took away amazingly funny S5 Ryan. Seriously, I feel like how fucking hysterical he was for the little screentime he got was desperately undersaid. Apparently he's going to come back a "changed man." I'm HOPING HOPING HOPING he joined a cult and shaved his head and wears a cassock. THAT WOULD BE AMAZING.

Monday, February 09, 2009

Oh, wow.

This is fucked up.

Who would be such an asshole that they would abuse Goddess Rihanna - or, yeah, any woman - and so stupid as to do it on the night of the Grammys?

IT'S FUCKING DISTRACTING. OHHH GOOD.

I can't stop listening to/laughing at this. Christian Bale has one heavy-ass accent.

Haha, I love Wonkette.

I was reading some old article about that old conservative pundit that talked about how Palin "projected through the screen" or whatever during the debate, and how he saw starbursts or whatever, and basically other crazy things. And one of the comments? "You know who else was good at projecting through the TV screen? SAMARA MORGAN!!!" I kind of died laughing. (and now because I thought of that movie, I have to curl up in a ball and cry now ;_;)

Yay for my BAFTA predix.

Woot. Actual winners, in order: Slumdog, Man on Wire, Boyle, Rourke, Winslet (Reader), Ledger, Cruz, In Bruges, Slumdog.

The voting for Best British Film will never make sense to me. Did Slumdog really win, but they didn't count it because it had already won Best Film, or something...?

Mickey winning was a nice surprise. I'm weirdly rooting for him, even though I haven't seen his movie; the trailer/commercial of The Wrestler is still so powerful, even after I've seen it ten thousand times. Sean was great and I fully expect him to make my final line-ups, but he's not so good he deserves to dominate awards season. Like the rest of Milk, everything was great but nothing pushed it to extraordinary (I do love how unapologetically gay the film was, though). I still think Sean will take the Oscar, but it'll be close.

In Bruges winning Best Original Screenplay = LOVE. The more I think about that film, the more I love it; it was black-bleak dark comedy done right (I'm looking at you, Heathers, you piece of misanthropic, desperately unfunny shit).

Angelina Jolie's dress was like totally wacked out and AMAZING. Here is a photo of it, sadly the best I was able to encounter. I wish she would wear crazily interesting stuff more often as opposed to gray/navy potato sacks. Get in touch with your inner Bjork, Angelina!

Sunday, February 08, 2009

Remember when I used to do random movie posts?

Yeah! So I'm gonna do that again. Here are the most overrated and underrated movies since 2000.

OVERRATED
2000: Almost Famous
2001: Ghost World
2002: The Hours
2003: Pirates of the Caribbean: Whatever
2004: Finding Neverland
2005: Brokeback Mountain
2006: Babel
2007: Once
2008: Rachel Getting Married (of what I've seen so far)

UNDERRATED
2000: George Washington
2001: Lantana
2002: Morvern Callar
2003: Love Actually
2004: Kinsey
2005: Jarhead
2006: Scoop
2007: Lust, Caution
2008: Iron Man (again, of what I've seen)

The Fame!

I only recognize Celia and Allison. No clue who the other girls are in this commercial. (shrug)

Oh BTW, watching like twelve hours of ANTM on Bravo today with my best friend was GLORIOUS. Cycle 6 to boot!!!

So, I actually read Twilight today.

Oh. Dear. God. It was SO BAD. It wasn't even ironic-enjoyable-bad, minus a few sentences here and there in its 500-page length garrrr. It definitely wasn't DaVinci Code-bad, where you know it sucks but you can't stop reading it. It was just totally boring as all hell, incredibly poorly written, and yeah, really really bad. I really wanna cry that this chick got something published before I did.

Hey, SNL.

She's really not that funny. No, really. Because seriously, her comedic skills seem to consist of... making this face. A lot. And even if she was as funny as she's been hyped up, putting her in every damn skit like you do would make her less so. So, really, put her on way less. Thanks.

BAFTA predix

Best Film: Slumdog Millionaire (alt. The Reader)
Best British Film: Slumdog Millionaire (alt. Mamma Mia! or In Bruges)
Best Director: Danny Boyle (alt. David Fincher)
Best Actor: Sean Penn (alt. Dev Patel)
Best Actress: Kate Winslet for The Reader (alt. Kristin Scott Thomas)
Best Supporting Actor: Heath Ledger (alt. PSH)
Best Supporting Actress: Penelope Cruz (alt. Freida Pinto)
Best Original Screenplay: Milk (alt. Changeling)
Best Adapted Screenplay: Slumdog Millionaire (alt. The Reader)

Cuz why not.

Saturday, February 07, 2009

Hey Gipper, you asshole.

You really didn't deserve this classy, gorgeous lady.

I don't care for you much, Battlestar Galactica.

This photo on the other hand...
ummm....
I'm gonna need a minute...........

Thursday, February 05, 2009

People who are friends with me,

this is what you're getting on your birthday from now on:

Oh, okay, I'll throw some mini candy bars at you too.

(GREAT episode. Again, suck it S5 haters!)

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Interesting.

Jude Law playing a woman in his next film.

I've already said that I wouldn't feel comfortable dating him because he's prettier than me, so I guess this is the next step?

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

My Spanish professor

looks like Christian Siriano. She (yes, she) doesn't act or talk like him, but she's got the same body and face shape (though I think she's taller), and pretty much the same haircut minus all the flourishes Christian did. She also has a weird way of standing like him, though way less flamboyant.

...I dooooon't think I'll tell her this.

Monday, February 02, 2009

oh, and next this! week...

KAREN'S PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!!! *

And a dual Jim/Dwight talking head!

* there is no way that's Jim's. I know the writers of this show sometimes get, well, extremely messed up with timeline continuity, but they ain't THAT messed up. That line of Michael's is being used in a sort of meta way to poke fun, gently, at those that would think that. Rashida Jones is going over to the Amy Poehler ersatz spin-off (now apparently called Parks and Recreation), so I'm pretty sure Karen is 100% done with the show now, and she wouldn't be if she was actually having Jim's baby. Also, if you look at Karen's hand over her stomach when she first walks in, she's got one hell of a ring on her finger, so she's clearly married.

"Stress Relief" for reals this time.

Because Andy kind of owned this episode and Ed Helms needs an Emmy for it now (Steve Carell too, but he deserves an Emmy for every darn episode, and Rainn Wilson's been incredible this season as well). I am more vehement about this than I am about anything John Krasinski or Jenna Fischer have done this season, so that should say a lot. This is gonna be... long, folks (TWSS!).

The cold open was fucking epic, the third-best ever behind only "Traveling Salesmen" (HARVEY) and "The Injury" (an episode a bit like this one, where everything was very broad, but everything was very hilarious so it worked). It just got bigger and bigger and funnier and funnier. SAVE BANDIT! THE FIRE IS SHOOTING AT US!! BARACK IS PRESIDENT!!!

Can we all stop bitching about Pam's outfit and hair now? Look, she wore a boring cardigan/button-down combo, but it was in a non-pastel color and it was vaguely flattering (I do understand the complaints about the shirts with the bows and the puffy sleeves and whatnot, because as a girl, I'm always like OMG THOSE SHIRTS ARE SOOOO CUUUUTE and I buy them and they're actually a pain in the ass because the bows are always annoying and puffy sleeves kind of constrict your arms). Her hair was a great combination between her S1/2/3 hair and the S4/5 hair. So she still looks dowdy, but she's not making herself look ten years older and not pretty. YAY, COMPROMISE.

Love the new credits. I know they were probably just for the Super Bowl, but they were great. This show is and always will be an awesome ensemble. The clips from old episodes were great; work @ the JAM kiss.

David Wallace in the Super Bowl episode? Bestill my heart! Both meetings with Corporate were hilarious and awesome.

All of Michael's THs were awesome too. "An office is a place where dreams come true." Michael knew what to do, but he didn't know what to do. "That one makes me think of... death. ... It's kinda nice." "You never expect that you're the killer. It's a great twist." Talking about "boss" as slang and how great he looks in shoulder pads and perms. The spaceman on a star. Laughter is the best medicine so Stanley doesn't need his pills... but maybe he should hold on to them anyway.

The Stanley montage. Hahaha. Great intro for new viewers, great memories for the die-hards, hilarious for both. "I'm going to die."

Michael's reference to Glengarry Glen Ross which, of course, was famously given life on-screen by Alec Baldwin. Oh, NBC, must you always promote 30 Rock? ;)

Yay, conference room scenes. I think what this season has been missing for me, if anything, is conference room scenes. Seriously, they're always fucking hysterical. This one was no exception, with Michael mixing up "Staying Alive" and "I Will Survive," the group sing-a-long to "Staying Alive" including Kelly's dancing, and then Dwight harvesting organs from the dummy (!).

"You were in the parking lot earlier, that's how I know you!"

I heard people say that Jessica Alba being on the show means it's jumped the shark. Um, wut? Dude, you are being melodramatic. She was on for .005 seconds. A lot of people didn't like the pirated movie storyline, but I did. Jack Black was really, really funny in it (in the first segment of the movie, he has a face right before Pam's phone rings for the first time that is Jim-worthy), the running gag of the terrible music cracked me up and the group I watched this episode with (a couple of die-hards, a bunch who watch the show fairly often, a bunch that haven't ever seen it or have just seen a few episodes here and there), but more importantly, it allowed the writers to deal with the JAM storyline in a way that, thank God, was integrated into the office as a whole and saved it from being The Office, And This Really Cute Couple That Works There But Doesn't Really Have Anything To Do With The Rest Of It All. It gave a slight comic beat to what could have been melodrama. Plus, more funny Andy, so YAY. "M'lady, m'tuna..." and his sad popcorn. AHAHAHAHA

Dual JAM talking heads! And yes, the JAM sideplot in this episode worked great. That last scene of the two of them, ugh, I actually had tears welling up. The hug was amazing. And yes, I loved it when Pam said they were "soulmates." Sorry that I'm a big softie. The JAM scene in the kitchen at the beginning, where she tries to get him to talk to her dad, was wonderful too. They've got such a great connection.

Along those lines, I thought Jim's "50% of marriages end in divorce" TH wasn't dickish, but instead a way of showing his personality. He always tries to hide horrible situations through humor/sarcasm, but it doesn't work (see a lot of his S2 and a good handful of his S3 THs... "it's not really a date if the girl goes home with her fiance" and "Brangelina is with Frangelina" and stuff like that), and he always realizes it halfway through. In this case, he tries to make the joke, then looks all glum. Aww, Jim.

It was nice to see Pam vulnerable. Clearly I'm a big champion of Super Fancy New Pam, but I do miss her rare moments where I just felt freaking awful for her, though it's good that they're measured out and don't feature in every episode. I got tired of her constant passive moping in S1/2/3 (gasp, not criticism of S2 and S3!!!!).

Dwight trying to get everyone to sign his form, including his desperate attempts to get Phyllis to do so, is a pretty underrated part of this episode in that I've heard no one comment on it at all. It was funny.

I loved Michael's long rambling description of the relaxing meadow and the castle and the pot (!) and whatnot.

"Chocolate." "Racism is dead, Stanley, you can have any kind of ice cream you want!"

"Oscar, can you reach over and touch his thing? That's what he said! Guys, 'cuz of... gay..." I think Paul Lieberstein should just be assigned the task of writing Michael for all eternity. He did an AMAZING job here and in "Goodbye Toby."

"I consider myself a good person. But I'm going to try to make him cry."

The roast was just... oh my God. Andy's song might be the funniest thing EVER on this show and I'm including Prison Mike there (though the latter probably beats it by just a little). I loved Angela's bad "you might be a redneck if..." takeoff, "I don't make burgers where you work and then tell you how to make burgers!", Kelly's list of people she would make out with before Michael (including a candle and Lord Voldemort) and "happy birthday Michael" (bahahahaha), Oscar furiously yelling in Spanish, Toby standing up to roast Michael only to be turned away, Pam being adorable ("If it were an iPod it would be a shuffle!!!"), "You don't have any friends, or any family, or any land," Darryl's roast (the guy had a name tag!), oh, and did I mention I loved Andy's song SOOOO MUCH and Andy in general this episode?

I loved Dwight going on about the icicles and how they may have possibly impaled Michael's brain. Some have said this was a diss of Grey's Anatomy because apparently that happened on GA (!), but I haven't watched that show for years. Either way, hysterical.

Gotta love the entire personnel/personal day conversation with the text message.

Michael randomly throwing bread everywhere and cawing, hahaha. I love this show so much. I like to think he was wearing a black turtleneck because he was in an emo mood.

Andy talking about how he should be a food critic or an art critic was just so... awesome. Ugh, I love him so much in this episode. Emmy now kthnxbi.

OH MY GOD, MICHAEL'S ROAST. My friend and I were walking to dinner tonight and we kept quoting it. I'm missing/paraphrasing a few here, but...
Jim, you are 6'11" and weigh 90 pounds; Gumby has a better body than you.
Meredith, you've slept with so many guys that you're starting to look like one.
Kevin, I can't decide between a fat joke and a dumb one.
Angela... where's Angela? Oh, I can't see her behind that grain of rice.
Stanley, you crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks.
Oscar, you're gay. (the delivery of this one was AMAAAAAZING)
Andy, Cornell called. They think you suck. And you're gayer than Oscar! (please let this be foreshadowing an Andy/Oscar love affair. Apparently in the next episode, Andy falls for someone he shouldn't, and I don't think I can take any more in-office love affairs, UNLESS IT'S THESE TWO. PLEASE GOD PLEASE.)
BOOM, ROASTED. BAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH

I love that everyone in the office was laughing and smiling during that. It was really so sweet. Funny that at least two Stanley-centric episodes (this and "Did I Stutter?"... not so much "Branch Wars") ended up with really wonderful, unexpectedly moving endings.

And because I probably haven't reminded you about its amazingness in a few minutes:

We're stuck listenin' to you all day!
Stanley tried to die just to get away!

The Office won the DGA?

I did not know this!

This only further proves my hypothesis that "Dinner Party" rocks (it beat 30 Rock in SOMETHING!!!!) and those who hate it are just whiny stick-in-the-muds-OMG-this-would-have-never-happened-in-S2-waaaah.

and also...

who, at this point, is saying The Office can't do hour-longs? WHO?! After "A Benihana Christmas," "The Job," "Fun Run," "Money," "Goodbye Toby," "Weight Loss," and "Stress Relief," you're just flat-out WRONG!

Apologies for sounding like some nasty Republican commentator on an AOL article ("you LIEbrals just can't face up to the facts that your uh, uh, uh, Messiah is going to fail.......").

and a funny thing about Rachel Getting Married

If I had to pick one film it reminded me of, it would almost certainly be Lost in Translation. They both had a small and almost forced intimate feel, and both were funny but achingly melancholy overall. However, as I gave Rachel Getting Married a C+ and Lost in Translation something along the lines of an A++++++++++++, clearly there's a difference.

I think Lost in Translation achieved its goals much better. It was funnier, and it was certainly more heart-wrenching. I recognized that the two main characters had an assload of flaws, but at the same time I palpably felt for them. Sure, there were a lot of scenes where you might have wondered "well, where is this going?" but they always ended up proving a point, whether it was to demonstrate something about the Japanese society or simply to be funny. Rachel Getting Married, I think the editor was in love with every second of film shot and could not let go of any of it. Like, if RGM's editing standard was applied to LiT, they would have shown the non-Bob and Charlotte characters singing for twenty minutes, not ten seconds.

Speaking of the karaoke scene... have you worshipped this movie enough lately?

Perfection. Rachel Getting Married, um, not so much, but not a total waste of your time either.

"Stress Relief"

I LOVE THE OFFICE. Seriously, that episode was amazing.

I know I've been doing a shitty job of summarizing this season's episodes up here (it's because I have Friday afternoon classes and can't spend forever waiting for this internet connection to load Hulu BLAAAARGGGGG), but I swear, when I do rewatch this one (probably Wednesday), it will get a full write-up and lots of "OMG I LOVED IT SO MUCH!!!!!!!"

Sunday, February 01, 2009

so I've seen Rachel Getting Married

It kind of sucked and I didn't care about anyone but the dad; the rest of the characters could frankly go jump in a lake for all I care. Most scenes started out very well, but then went on far too long (when the whole dishwasher scene went on and on and on and on and ON!!!!, I was basically like, "...am I missing something?!?!?!?"). Semi-weak and borderline cliche screenplay. It wasn't moving at all, though most of the acting was very real. The filming also gave me a headache. C+ overall.

Whoever thought the year would come that Anne fuckin' Hathaway was better in her Oscar-nominated performance than Meryl Streep?

Though, let's get one thing straight: Anne was good, not super great. From some of the reviews, you'd think she re-imagined Medea. At the beginning of the film, she had all these lines that I imagine were supposed to be funny, but she completely bombed the delivery of them. I can't complain about her Oscar nomination because some of her later emotional scenes were downright searing, but she doesn't deserve the win. Also, don't pretend she didn't play to all of Oscar's favorite tricks too: addicts and de-glamming (did we need to see her shaving her 'pits? Disgusting). And as an actress myself, the whole acting-behind-a-cigarette thing drives me INSANE.

Bill Irwin & Rosemarie DeWitt OMG. You two were flawless. Where's YOUR attention?