WHOOOOAH how did I miss this

they're getting married in... like... a week. ZOOOOMG. Also this announcer or whoever is doing the voiceover is annoying but who cares?!

ANTM this week.

I really could not love Laura more.

More later.

Wow, Heidi Klum.

You are very pregnant and should probably be lying on a bed or something with Seal massaging your feet, not hangin' out on Ellen.

Guys, I am SO LAME.

I just saw a trailer for The Lucky Ones and honestly, I freaking cried AT THE TRAILER. Was this movie so unbelievably bad that it just kind of came out without any sort of fanfare? Cuz like, it's about the military and has Tim Robbins and the Oscars usually love stuff like that...

NOOOO!!!!!

No new Top Chef this week? Why?! SAD TIMES!

so watching the Mets has been highly entertaining this year

That's all.

Like, Luis Castillo won the Gold Glove one year? WHAT.

And the Yankees Triple A is STILL better than the Kansas City Royals. Or at least Kyle Farnsworthless.

I hope this doesn't make me seem dumb, but...

Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader? is actually quite difficult, most of the time. :( Generally not the kindergarten questions, obviously, but the upper grades are awful.

Just a note.

Yankees AAA > Kansas City Royals minus Greinke

I love how the article isn't even about the game. It's a hangover article... heh.

Jason Schwartzman is so terrible.

Why does he continue to get roles in anything? Like, when Sofia Coppola makes a movie and it's gorgeous and brilliant, it's all OMG SHE'S JUST USING HER DADDY! and this guy can suck in everything and nobody mentions he's a Coppola.

Oh, and I still kind of want another one of those quesadillas. So fucking delicious.

in which Justine Credible actually eats something

So I think I might be over my stomach issue thing, so today I decided to have a Weight Watchers quesadilla for dinner. OH MY GOD IT WAS LIKE THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER EATEN I SWEAR. Maybe because I've barely eaten these past few days? Whatever, it was AMAZING.

the "chicken and cheese" quesadilla that comes in the red boxes in the frozen food aisle - super highly recommended <3333 and there's two in a box!

I just can't help it.

I think I'll always love America's Next Top Model, however dumb it is.

Post #2000.

That's crazy!

infomercials that are not necessary:

1. ones featuring feet
2. that one for the ugh I forget what it is, but it's some kind of buffering thing, and it shows someone buffing their feet with it, followed immediately by someone buffering an orange with it. SO GROSSSSSSS! and this kind of ties in to #1.

Oh Borat.

Will you ever not be funny? Nope.

"ENJOY YOURSELF, BITCHES! IT'S A CELEBRAAATION!!!!"

New York Yankees clinch AL East

3:30 or thereabouts on. Drunk Tex all coated in champagne? Oh YES. And there's other funny stuff.

WTF?

Why am I still sick?

The baseball game today.

This was during the game, when Tex and A-Rod scored the runs on Matsui's single that would give them the lead, which they wouldn't relinquish for the rest of the game. And... Mark Teixeira being WAYYY TOO OMG EXCITED!!!! about something? Yeah, how surprising.

Mo is... Mo. ILhim. And he looks so handsome with a hat! And TERRIBLE without one.

This is my favorite photo in a while. Is this guy ever gonna age? And whoah, chicken legs.

Yeah, I might have saved that photo as "hotwetarod," you wanna make something of it?

This might be my favorite picture of the day because everyone else is like "yay champagne fun times!!!" and Tex is drinkin' a beer, y'all. Keepin' it classy.

He is just love.

Who the hell is the guy on the right? And why is Sergio Mitre (that is Sergio Mitre, right?) looking like Zac Efron here?

A Yankee newbie and THE MAN.

Ace is my favorite bullpen member other than Mo, and hip hip JORGE!

This photo is gonna inspire a lot of fanfiction.

Well done, boys. Well done.

Of course I missed it

Someone - a new cast member, to boot!!!! - dropped an F-bomb on Saturday Night Live. I'm expecting that video to be up for like four more seconds, so... hustle over to watch it. What?! Isn't this thing pre-taped?! Whoah.

yup

I turned SNL off. Sorry U2, even you are not worth sitting through for this crap. Maybe next week will be better? It will at least be hotter, with Ryan Reynolds there, and crazier, with YAY LADY GAGA.

noooo :(

There is already too much Kristin Wiig.

...I should probably get a Twitter for this kind of crap, no? Oh well. I never will SO THERE.

spoke too soon

This opening skit is already way too long. Oh thank God it's over. Was it really only 4 minutes? Felt like 45.

ooh

Saturday Night Live is back. I hope it's not super terrible.

Argh

I love Forgetting Sarah Marshall, but Russell Brand is extremely annoying in every other context. Like... he SUCKED hosting the VMAs.

On a holiday, and I BLAM BLAM BLAM!

Thank you, trailer for Capitalism: A Love Story, for reminding me how awesome that song is.

what the hell is this St. Trinian's shit?

And why is the truly awesome Colin Firth in it? :(

Updated ANTM predictions.

14. Lisa
13. Rachel
12. Courtney
11. Lulu
10. Rae
The judges don't like her any more. I can see her minorly messing up the next shoot and the judges really coming down on her for it.
9. Ashley
Did they mention she's a dancer and they think it holds her back?
8. Bianca
I'm pretty sure she's getting the Sandra elimination, where she lands in the B2 a lot before unceremoniously being dumped.
7. Kara
She'll be told that she's too harsh and that her portfolio isn't as good as the other girls or something.
6. Erin
Her elimination will be BS. It seems like the judges like her now, which is good, cuz I was kind of fearing she'd be Clarked (FCO one week, eliminated the next pre-overseas) this week.
5. Sundai
I think Tyra has a soft spot for her, so she'll get far, but damn, she's just too short.
4. Brittany
I just get the feeling she goes far.
3. Nicole
Commercial appeal? Nicole? Yeah not really. Plus, she's too good to be top two.
2. Laura
She's definitely getting far, and if I wasn't like 75% sure Jennifer was winning this, she'd absolutely be my guess.
1. Jennifer
One time for the AAAAA-SIAAAANS!!!!

Haha

Last night at the Yankee game, Jason Varitek totally looked like he'd rather be posting on fmylife.com rather than catching. Can't say I minded.

So I actually just saw the "Paparazzi" video for the first time

Lady Gaga sure is, uh, high concept.

I STILL LOVE HER.

watching Pink's Behind the Music (it's back?!?!)

I really could not love her more. She is such a badass, seems to have a brain and a sense of humor, and her music, while still pop for sure, keeps getting better. "So What" is like the greatest thing ever.

I need to cleanse the top post of this blog of Glenn Beck ickiness.

I love Laura! She's keeping a "blog" of sorts about her appearance on ANTM.

Glenn Beck.

Okay, so when I was in college, I watched a good amount of CNN, where his show was until this past winter or so. I'd see it every so often. And while he was obviously a Libertarian, which I have sooo many issues with that I'm not gonna get into, he was sane. He wasn't screaming or freaking out or excessively twitching or crying about how much he loves his country and fears for it or whatever or chopping watermelons up to protest environmental legislation because "green on the outside, RED on the inside!!!!" or throwing frogs into pots of boiling water (all of those have happened on his show). He was... yeah. Not that.

I can't tell if Fox tells him to act the way he does, or if he's like that because he's off his medication or something. Either way, it's kind of disturbing to see how much he's changed. And his Twitter is just like... well, every time I look at it, I feel like I'm in Apocalypse Now: "the horror... the horror..."

Baby Mama

Eh. It's okay. It's got its moments, but it's not that funny, though I think the relationship between Tina Fey and Amy Poehler's characters was really nicely done. Honestly, some of the music was really weird, and I wish Steve Martin had a bigger or better part, because he's Steve Martin. It also helped me prove my theory that Amy Poehler is, frankly, just a better comedic actress than Tina Fey.

The ending was contrived BEYOND, but that's okay.

I was reading old posts and... apparently I thought Kristin Wiig was better than Amy Poehler on SNL? Ew. EWWWWWWWWWWWW. Was I on drugs?!?!

Project Runway Week Terrible.

I am on the verge of not caring. Seriously, Nicholas is gross, and Michael and Nina need to come back ASAP. I never thought the show would be so dependent on them!

Althea: It's okay. For me, it's pretty much the quintessential middle-of-the-road entry. The simplicity works for sure, but it's so... basic. And I'm not sure what white floppy blouses or big-ass necklaces have to do with film noir. It looks good from the front, but from the side, the fit is kind of terrible. Actually, the more I look at it, the worse it gets.

Carol Hannah: This was skanky, but super hot. It's an interesting interpretation for action-adventure; I could definitely see this outfit making an appearance in Tomb Raider or something. I don't know how flattering the various leather things are, but I love that belt and the way she handled the design.

Christopher: So... this was pretty much his avant-garde beachwear minorly reinterpreted. Part of me likes that it's an updated period piece, but it seems like he hardly put any effort into actually following the requirements of the challenge. It's gorgeously made though, and I still love his model (I don't bother to watch Models of the Runway any more, but I heard they all had to switch models this week? Boo).

Epperson: It's kind of hideous, but at the same time, part of me loves it. He definitely mixed his theme with a modern twist. I love that it's Western punk! That said, there's just too much frippery going on. I would have guessed this outfit was Carol Hannah's if I didn't know. That's not really a compliment from me, though she did well this week. I think I'd like it way better without the white stuff on the bottom. Still, I do like it. It's much more than the sum of its parts.

Gordana: What is this girl gonna have to do not to land in the bottom for virtually no reason? Yeah, it's not exactly creative, but it's really beautiful. This photo isn't particularly great, but I remember it sparkled on the runway. I thought it was really pretty and fun and definitely a period piece. The shoes suck for this and the gloves are probably the wrong color, but otherwise she accessorized it perfectly.

Irina: It's... okay. I think she created a character, but don't see how that giant white gauze hood is film noir, so it's the wrong character. I can't tell and don't remember if those cut-out things are fabric or skin. If it's skin, ewwwww. If it's fabric, well, it doesn't look that good.

Logan: It's very Matrix. Considering it's Logan and I know his execution can be kind of spotty, and this seems to be almost entirely leather, I think this is almost flawlessly made. The design is boring, though, but I do like the built-in boots.

Louise: This isn't so much film noir as period piece... how surprising, coming from Louise. I think the judges were right to put this in the bottom. It's a cute idea but it's extremely cheap-looking and kind of basic. Gordana's was similar, but worlds better.

Nicholas: You know I can't stand him, but this is hot. It's not my favorite, but I can't really argue with the win. The fabric looks cheap, as does the stuff around the neck, but he definitely created a character. Where he really nailed this is in the styling. I love this model, and she totally sold the outfit as well.

Ra'mon: I love him, and this is definitely science fiction, but frankly, it's a cheap-ass looking hot mess. It's a great fabric choice, but it just doesn't work. The collar and styling are great too, but it's just so bad. He should have been B2, for sure, but Louise should have gone. Hers was not only ugly and cheap-looking but boring, plus she had an easier genre and her portfolio isn't as good overall.

Shirin: Oh, Jesus. This is really... well... points for going all out, but it's a dumb-looking costume. The feather in the hair is KILLING me, and not in a good way.


Best to Worst:
Epperson
Gordana
Carol Hannah
Nicholas
Christopher
Logan
Irina
Althea
Shirin
Ra'mon
Louise

WHY.

I AM STILL SICK. WHY. Seriously, I think I've eaten four meals in the past week and a half.

Well that's crazy.

So apparently, when the White Sox win a game at home, they have fireworks? Look, maybe I shouldn't be talking about teams spending money exorbitantly because I'm a freaking Yankees fan, but that seems... wasteful.

OH MY GOD.

This may be the greatest thing I have ever read on the internet and I have read a lot of things on the internet.

104 (now 105) posts in September 2009!

That's the most EVER in any month!!! Whoah. I... am crazy.

Ugh, Project Runway...

What's with all my reality shows tonight being retarded? :( Maybe irrationally, I can't stand Nicholas. He's just so gross and egotistical and NOT REALLY TALENTED. And I liked Ra'Mon, so... boo.

Yo, Russell, I'm really happy for you, and I'ma let you finish...

But Richard Hatch was one of the best Survivor villains of all time! ALL TIME!

I am done with this season. I'll tune in at 8:45 every week to see who goes home, and that's it. Maybe after Ben and Russell leave, I'll watch, but I'm pretty sure that's not happening for a very long time. There isn't a single likable person on the island. I mean, seriously, there's a woman who's a 39-year-old Bible-bumping grandmother and conservative activist who describes herself as a "fit Sarah Palin" who we haven't even had time to hate yet because she's had no screen time! Instead, we get WORSTVILLAINEVER!Russell and the racist, misogynistic, and homophobic Ben. Yaaaay. I mean, last season was The Coach Show, and goddamn that got annoying, but at least Coach was really hilarious at times.

I'll go ahead and declare Foa Foa the worst tribe ever on the show. Yeah, tribes like Ulong from Survivor: Palau or Maraamu from Survivor: Marquesas were epic fails, but they were funny epic fails. Ravu from Survivor: Fiji was horrible, but understandably so, since they were, oh, deprived of all supplies while the other camp lived in (relative) luxury. Pagong in the original Survivor was single-handedly outwitted, but hey, it was the first Survivor, I can cut them some slack. Foa Foa is just completely pathetic.

OMG.

I am totally watching the Tyra Show and it is really amazing, in a cheap-ass trainwreck way.

Eeeeee! & "The Meeting"

Eeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

Anyway, tonight's episode was great. I was on the edge of my seat almost the entire time, and I didn't know that the show could do that! It was extremely well-written and well-directed. The new direction it introduced is interesting, and I'm excited to see what comes out of it. I just hope Michael and Jim don't become enemies, because I love Michael and Jim interaction and especially Michael and Pam interaction (weren't they amazing just this episode? "Please don't talk about my breast milk.").

Funny stuff:
- Toby yelling "ASSHOLE!" at what he thought was Darryl, because... it's Toby!
- Michael hiding under the cheese cart, attempting to listen in on what Jim and David Wallace were discussing... only to have the meeting end promptly.
- the cold open! the cold open! the cold open!!!!
- Andy's tie!
- Dwight's reaction to Jim's promotion!
- Pam talking to everyone trying to get RSVPs for the wedding
- Creed and Michael. HAH.
- oh gosh I can't think of anything else right now, but it was great. :D

ANTM C13 Week 3 photos.

Just in case you forgot, Laura is love.

1. Nicole
Well HELLO. This photo is divine. It’s a little simple, but that works, and this photo completely nailed the point of the shoot, which was looking taller. Nicole looks like she could be seriously topping 6’ here, it’s that good. I’m sure Anna Wintour would have an aneurysm if she knew Tyra referred to her on ANTM (that is, if Anna Wintour even knows the show exists, which she probably doesn’t), but Tyra was right; Nicole looks like a real model here, and that’s amazing. The only issue, and it’s really minor, is that you can’t quite tell that she’s raised up her foot, so the knee thing could look a little weird, but it’s pretty obvious that’s her knee. You all know I hate the “straight outta Vogue!!!!” comment, but this genuinely could be in any major fashion magazine.

2. Erin
I really love Erin now, and it looked like there were photos even better than this one during her shoot where she was using the props a lot more. Something about this picture is so classy and fashionable. I wouldn’t agree with the judges’ comments that she looked like, 5’11”, but she definitely looks taller than 5’6”. Her legs, in particular, look totally long. The angle doesn’t hurt, but hey, she’s working it. The pose is so elegant and simple, but it still works, and her face is simply beautiful. I love the expression and I never mind it when girls look like Cycle 4’s Rebecca. Her arm looks a little like a chicken wing and it’s not AS awesome as Nicole’s, but it’s a really good photo. And those shoes are fierce!

3. Kara
She’s getting better every week, and this photo is pretty damn kickass. I totally understand why it got first call-out. She’s using the props and set extremely well, and she looks incredibly tall. I forget how tall she actually is, but she looks way taller than 5’7” so, yeah, good job. Those legs, in particular, are just awesome, and her pose is killer. I don’t give her first call-out because of, mostly, her face. It’s just way too harsh – she genuinely looks like a drag queen in the face, I’m sorry to say – and she’s giving me Brooke C6 vibes, and that is never a good thing! Her arm/boob area just looks so buff, too, and it’s kind of weird. But this photo is excellent even with the weird drag face, and I hope she keeps her improvement going.

4. Jennifer
Yay, Jennifer finally took a decent photo! The pose is glorious. She’s using the props/set extremely well, yet really subtly, and showing off the dress really well. She looks extremely tall here, too, which was the whole point of the shoot; I’d never guess she’s under 5’7”. Like Kara, though, her face sets her down low. Her expression is just so comically blank, her face doesn’t look good at that angle, and her eyes are just so… flat? Dead? Weird? I don’t know how to say it, exactly, but it’s not a good look in her eyes. Oh, and you can tell her arms are short, but honestly, it’s an afterthought. I’m just happy Jennifer is taking photos that aren’t the worst of the week.

5. Sundai
She is so darn adorable and this is her best picture yet. Eh, that might sound like it’s not saying much because in the past two weeks, I’ve given her the call-out right before the bottom two, but this is actually a good photo. She doesn’t really look tall, exactly – it’s obvious her body is pretty short and her legs don’t look that long – but she’s using the props and set very well in order to make herself look taller. I’d never guess she’s 5’3” here. The pose is a little bit posey, but again, she did succeed in making herself look taller, which was the point of the shoot. Plus, she shows off the clothing really well. Her face isn’t exactly great, but the relaxed vibe helps to loosen up the possible overposed-ness. And she’s really inescapably pretty.

6. Lulu
Yeah, she didn’t deserve to go home for this. She completely nailed the brief of the shoot, which was to look taller using the set and the props. She’s totally utilizing that wheel thing extremely well, and the arm extension makes her look incredibly tall. It’s a very fashionable pose, and she’s showing off the clothing pretty well to boot, though the vanished sleeve is kinda weird. In fact, the only reason why I don’t rank her higher is due to her face. The expression is just so dead and her mouth and teeth look really, really bad and kind of busted here. Overall, the photo isn’t great, but she’s been too strong overall and this photo wasn’t bad enough to send her home compared to most of the other girls.

7. Laura
I still love her, but this is definitely her weakest photo so far. Lying down didn’t make her look any taller at all; I know she’s one of the taller girls at 5’6” but I’d guess she’s one of the shortest here. She’s lengthening her torso while making her legs look shorter, and they look about the same length here, which isn’t really good at all. Her arm positioning seems kind of awkward and haphazard, too. That said, I love her face. She looks gorgeous here. She just looks so pretty, and I love the subtle sexuality there. But her face is saving her, because the body isn’t really any good at all. It’s not like this photo is bad, but like I said, it’s her weakest yet. I have no doubt she’ll keep on being awesome after this, though.

8. Ashley
This photo was okay. She Something about her still looks short, but she’s using her legs and arms extremely well, so I’ll give her credit for that. I do think this photo has other flaws, though. First of all, the pose is really… I’ll say ho-ish. Close your legs, lady! My main issue, because Ashley is kind of pulling the pose off, is her face. It’s just SO hard and the attitude doesn’t work. Plus, she looks super drag, which becomes awkward with the open legs thing. And the dress cuts her off at weird, unflattering places or something. That said, though her attitude was bad this episode, I felt for her when the judges were getting on her case about being a dancer and blaming all her supposed shortcomings – including some that didn’t really exist – on that.

9. Rae
Lying down didn’t work for Laura and it didn’t work for Rae, either. This is her weakest photo so far, too. Like Laura, her proportions look very off, with an overly long torso and too-short legs. I gave her a lower call-out than Laura because Rae, again, looks kind of chunky here, and that’s never good for a fashion model. Her hips are just too big here. The facial expression is really weird too, but I can’t fault her that much on the face, because she’s still really pretty. She’s just a gorgeous girl, and here, she totally looks like Scarlett Johansson. Hot. She might need to tone up, though.

10. Bianca
This photo makes me LOL. It’s really bad. It’s definitely her worst photo so far, and of course it’s the one she didn’t actually land in the bottom two for. The pose is… well, I can see what she was going for, at least, but she didn’t elongate her body at all. At 5’7”, she’s actually one of the taller girls, but she looks significantly shorter than that in this photo. Her legs just look so damn stumpy, as do her arms, and her arms look extremely muscular, which isn’t good. Oh, and the judges got all excited about her face… huh? Her face is terrible here! She looks really really ugly, and I maintain that she’s one of the most beautiful girls there in person. Seriously, the expression and the entirely dead face are both awful.

11. Brittany
Once again, Brittany disappoints. I like how she’s pulling out the skirt of her dress to display the clothes, but that’s the best thing about this photo (well, that, and she looks really well-proportioned). The judges were right that she looks short. Like, she’s somehow trying to extend her body, but it didn’t work. Mostly, though, the entire picture is just so damn stiff. The lower body is okay, but the neck, shoulders, and arms (just to add to the not-goodness of this photo, her arms look extremely stumpy) just make me feel soooo uncomfortable whenever I look at this photo. Her face is really not good, either. Brittany is a beautiful girl, but she can look really old, harsh, and masculine at times, and this is one of them. She actually needs to tone down what she does with her eyes, because they make her look way too intense and hard.

Bright Star

So I've seen previews, and I've seen that it's by Jane Campion and it was a love story and I was like, "Oh, geez, you know they're showing the 2 minutes of the movie that isn't a horrendously explicit and kind of gross sex scene," but then it's rated... PG (I think. Maybe PG-13. Certainly not R.). Seeing how this movie is getting raves and I did love The Piano, I definitely want to see it now. Hmm.

Top Chef tonight

Jen and Kevin, please come over to my kitchen immediately to make what you made for the elimination challenge. Nom nom nom.

Ew, everyone was so obnoxious to Robin, and I don't even like Robin! Though yeah, it's bizarre that Michelle Bernstein criticized, I think it was Laurine, for not being original enough and Robin won the quickfire... with a salad and an apple crisp. Yeah. I did not understand like 80% of those quickfire dishes, by the way. And did one of the Voltaggio brothers make salmon ice cream? GROSS.

Jen was hilarious and adorable when she was trying to run away from Tom. Scary bald man!

GUYS I REALLY CAN'T STAND TOBY. WHYYYYYY DID HE HAVE TO COME BACK.

I still looooove this season. Yeah, the Robin drama wasn't great, but it's reality TV, and I've come to expect it. The chefs are all just so talented.

what?

There's going to be a movie about Facebook (The Social Network), directed by David Fincher, written by Aaron Sorkin, and starring Justin Timberlake? This idea seems... odd.

Predictions for Top Chef tonight

I think Robin will win the high-stakes quickfire by mentioning that she has cancer... and then go home in the elimination challenge. Call me crazy. Kevin will win the elimination challenge.

I would predict ANTM too, but... uh... there are spoilers that I've read, so (for those of you wondering, don't read if you don't wanna know: Kara FCO, Brittany and Lulu B2, Lulu goes home BOOOOOO).

Aaah

Why is it so hot? Stop being hot, today. It is September 23. You should be cooler. I have cuter fall clothes and I'm tired of wearing flip-flops.

Top Chef/ANTM tonight!!!

So excited for the dramaz. :D

yeesh

Apparently I'm in a ranty/make no sense mood tonight/this morning/whatever you want to call it.

Oh, Showtime.

They're showing their lineup or whatever and honestly, it's just like ~EDGY~ ~EDGY~ ~EDGY~ Like, Weeds, which had one good season and has been hella uneven since. Californication? Hah, no. And it's gonna be on a college campus this year, I think? Yeahhhh. That won't be awkward to watch. Also, based on this preview they're showing now, the guy who plays Harry on Sex and the City - which may have to do with my Tom Colicchio love, because I just noticed how similar they look, and I TOTALLY LOVE THEM BOTH ZOMG - will be borderline sexually harrassed by some woman this season.

That said, Dexter is more or less worth the hype, and The Tudors is great pulp TV.

The comedic stylings of Derek Jeter.

Just 'cuz I'm in a Yankee mood.

The story behind this photo, which is a few months old but whatever deal with it y'all: Yankees are playing the Mets in interleague play at Shea Citi Field this year, so they're under National League rules, where there are no designated hitters; instead, the pitchers bat, and the pitchers are almost always really, really terrible at doing so, especially American League pitchers, who aren't used to hitting.

So it's a 3-2 game with the Yankees leading in the top of the 9th, two out and two on. Jeter is... I forget whether he's pinch-hitting or actually in the game or not, because I know he'd sat out some games that weekend because he had a head cold (on his birthday, too! Poor Derek.), but he's up at bat. And Mariano Rivera is due to hit behind him. Now, Mariano Rivera, despite playing for a really long time, still doesn't have all that much experience hitting due to the fact that there really aren't very many interleague games, some of them will be at Yankee Stadium (so AL rules), and he might not even need to pitch those games. I'm pretty sure there's a hilarious video of Melky Cabrera readying Mariano to bat, in which he shows him, like, the wonders of batting helmets and gloves. Awesome.

So with Jeter up and Mariano due to hit behind him, the Yankees put Cervelli, their adorable catcher, in the batting circle, and not Mariano. I think the Mets may have fallen for that truly dumb "let's pretend the pitcher's not batting next!!!" move, because they start actually pitching to Jeter, as opposed to just walking him and then obviously getting Mariano out. And Derek makes this "really? You're pitching to me? Do you know who's up next?" face, which was pretty hysterical, especially considering Jeter is kind of a robot (who I love, but... a robot) and the guy had the flu.

Oh, and Mo? Worked the count to a walk, driving in his first career RBI. In the bottom of the ninth, he'd get his 500th career save. I could devote many, many, many more paragraphs to the awesomeness of Mariano, but this has been long enough already.

That was a lot to explain one picture. BUT WHATEVS I love it.

I wanna rock!

Yankees back in the post-season, where they belong, due to a gem of a game where they won not only in the house of horrors for them that is the Anaheim stadium, but with the game being broadcast on My9*? AND after blowing a 5-0 lead then breaking a tie with Brett Gardener's ridiculosity, to boot?

ROCK OUT, BOYS!
Especially you, Tex and Swish. You deserve it!

* Seriously, they always lose on My9 =/ BUT NOT TODAY!

WHOAH my whole world just got rocked

"Don't Stop Believing" is about one-night stands?!

And now that I look at the lyrics... you know... whoah.

oh boy

So I'm watching the repeat of The Colbert Report. Keep in mind it's like 2:15 AM. Anyway, Comedy Central is currently advertising the TOP 50 BEST BREAST VIDEOS EVER! from Girls Gone Wild. Yeah... no.

Emmy fashion.

Because I'm bored. Overall, nobody looked amazing and nobody looked horrendous.

Jennifer Morrison: I don't like the hem or the overly heavily sewed (for lack of a better term) area by the boobs, but I've seen the back of this and it's way better.
Debra Messing: I like this. It's a nice silhouette and color, and the beading or gems or whatever add a really nice touch. The hair is nice, too.
Sigourney Weaver: I love the color, but the fabric strikes me as so prom-my. Still, she looks pretty hot, and she's pulling it off.
Carrie Preston: I'm not sure about the shoulder, but I think I like this. It's interesting. Even the weird little wing thing works, and I definitely like the belt, but again, it might clash with the shoulder.
Alyson Hannigan: It's a simple black dress, but I love the ruffling and details at the bottom. I didn't see this on a telecast or anything, but I think it's one of my favorite dresses of the night. The hair is great, too.
Christina Hendricks (this is right, right? Why does it say Kristina?): She's hot. Like, undeniably hot. That said, she looks really bulgy in this, I'm sorry. She doesn't look really bad, though. I don't think she ever could. And I love the cap sleeves with the retro appeal.
Lisa Edelstein: No. It looks pretty cheap. The satin looks wrinkly and the lace/whatever white fabric it is peeking out only make it look worse.
Jenna Fischer: It's not perfect, but it's probably the best I've seen her at one of these things. The hair and makeup and skin in general was really flawless, and I dunno what it was, but she just looked simply happy. I love the top of the dress, but the bottom is a little too wrinkly.
Rose Byrne: This is probably my favorite dress of the night. It's so romantic and sweet. It's a little over-the-top, but not crazily so. The hair and makeup are flawless, as well. I used to not like her, but I loved her in Adam, so I think I love her now. Yay.
Kate Walsh: I never like the whole "saddlebag" effect, but I think she looked really nice. The dress is a good color and her hair and makeup look flawless.
Olivia Wilde: This is really awful, in my opinion. I hate the cut-outs and the effect they create over her chest, and if you could see the back, there's a huge visible zipper there.
Anna Gunn: I have absolutely no idea who she is and I wish I could see a better photo of this, because it's a really awkward photo. The dress doesn't look terrible, though, just a little generic.
Jamie-Lynn Siegler: It's okay. It's kind of generic. It could be in a better color for her skin.
Jennifer Love Hewitt: It's plain, but I like it. She could have used some better hair, though. It looks sloppy here.
Sandra Oh: Another one of my favorite dresses. She looks flawless here, and it fits her perfectly. I don't even mind the lame little sash thing, because it looks nice blending in. If it was a contrasting color, I would probably hate it.
Melora Hardin: Over on The Office boards that I read, this dress is getting a lot of hate, because you are NEVER ALLOWED TO SAY ANYTHING GOOD ABOUT MELORA HARDIN OR JAN, but I like it. It's a nice color and it's pretty. It's a little too Disney princess, but eh. It's really not as bad as everyone was saying.
Joely Fischer: I like it. The color stops it from being dowdy, which it could have been with the cut.
Mila Kunis: This was one of my favorite dresses of the night. I love how she looks like a more high-fashion ballerina here. And I just love her from Forgetting Sarah Marshall, anyway.
Elizabeth Perkins: Okay, the color can't save this one from being dowdy. Yeesh. I do like the color, though, it's just too generously cut.
Padma Lakshmi: You all know I love her, but this dress needs some editing, to quote Project Runway. The ropes on the shoulders don't really work, but the hip flower thing is just truly awful.
Jessica Lange: It's fine. Not great, not horrible.
Julia Louis-Dreyfus: Again, it's fine. Not great and not horrible. It definitely obliterates her waist, which was a major issue with a lot of dresses I saw last night.
Christina Applegate: Half the time I see it, I really like it, and half the time I see it, I don't like it at all. The stomach band is just so, so weird, and I think it's see-through which is a no. But I like the color, and overall, I dunno, it's just nice.
Vanessa Williams: It's okay. A little prom-my. Pretty color.
Mariska Hargitay: Again, it's okay. Do her boobs look weird, or is it me? This looked better on TV. She's really pretty.
Holly Hunter: One of my favorites of the night. It's both really girly and pretty, and interesting and slightly edgy. She needed to comb her hair like whoah, though.
January Jones: Another favorite, for the same reasons as Holly Hunter. I even like the hip flaps. I think they're interesting.
Chloe Sevigny: Yet another favorite! She normally goes totally weird, but this is lovely while still not in any way boring. Polka dots! I love it.
Sally Field: Boring.
Tina Fey: Boring.
Glenn Close: Boring. And off-center, which bothers me with these kind of necklines.
Heidi Klum: I love it. Yeah, I'm getting tired, can you tell?
Blake Lively: CHEAAAAAP.
Toni Collette: I remember not liking it on TV, but it's lovely here. I adore bubblegum pink.
Drew Barrymore: Eh. It's a little too precious for me. It reminds me of the dress Penelope Cruz had at the Oscars a few years ago.
Hayden Panettiere: Eek. This is... eek. I remember not thinking it was terrible on the show, so... I dunno what changed here. It looks like it's barely holding on via weird-ass strings, or something. It's really bad.
Shohreh Aghdashloo: I loved her, though she was breathing really weirdly when she won her award. This dress is nice, but a little plain.
Mary Louise Parker: It's cute. I like that she went with a mini, because nobody else did. Again, how can you tell I'm getting tired?
Ginnifer Goodwin: I didn't see this on the broadcast, but this is so hot. The color is fabulous, I love the cut, and from what I can see of the necklace, it's great as well.
Dana Delaney: This was a nice dress, but not really spectacular. I love how she was defending Wolf Blitzer on Jeopardy during some red carpet interview. Hysterical.
Tracy Pollan: I just don't like that color or cut along the neckline. Yeah... that's about all I have to say.
Kyra Sedgwick: I love the color, but it's soooo twee. It needed a lot less going on.
Jennifer Carpenter: I love it, except for the clumping of the black beads by her boob. That's just weird and kind of chunky, and it should have followed the pattern of the rest of the dress. But it's really nice, other than that.
Nancy Carell: I love the color, but it's boring other than that. Love her, though.
Jane Fallon: It's okay. Ricky Gervais looks sharp in that tux, I must say, though I've officially decided I don't like him in person. He always comes on, makes some really snide remarks, and then leaves, and everyone thinks he's OMG SO FUNNY!!! I like him on The Office and Extras, though, and I'm still all excited about The Invention of Lying.
Wives of Colbert & Conan: Cute. Their husbands are extremely awesome.


Zzzz tired. I'm really sad they didn't have the lady in the crazy Obama dress.

random Project Runway musing

Nicholas is 26? Yeah, right. And he's really, really gross-looking, not for anything.

Thank you, random person.

I could use some giggles and well, you wore this.

Emmys!

Yay! I guess!

NPH, I love you and you did great (though I tired of the way you introduced every presenter with their most obscure role, but I'll just assume you didn't write that). Plus, you were fucking robbed of an Emmy. Seriously, Jon Cryer? I'll admit he's the best thing about Two and a Half Men, but that's like saying... I can't even think of an appropriate metaphor. NPH, Rainn, and the two 30 Rock guys are superior. Jeremy Piven, asshole though he may be, is superior too. So are Ed Helms and John Krasinski. Etc.

AAHHHH The Office WON SOMETHING!!!! And Bandit got a shout-out! I was expecting The Office to lose everything, so I was really pleasantly surprised. :) The Daily Show getting love was great too. And if I wasn't rooting so hard for The Office, I'd be happy for 30 Rock, because it's really better than most scripted TV. Just... not The Office.

Attempting to explain Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog to my dad, who I was watching the show with, was pretty hilarious.

The funniest/best part of the telecast was definitely the "facts" the announcer was saying after all the various nominees won. They were almost always really random and extremely funny.

Honestly, my favorite speech of the night was freakin' Jeff Probst. And that's really impressive by a guy who apparently couldn't remember to button his shirt up all the way or throw on a tie on the way out of Samoa...

Justin Timberlake has taken over all media and I love it.

Jon Hamm looks like a devastatingly handsome version of Steve Carell.

And yeah, I was surprised that there were only like four Kanye West jokes. I expected several thousand more.

I love Neil Patrick Harris to death, and I'm actually psyched about the Emmys...

But if I read one more "These Emmys will be... legen - WAIT FOR IT - dary!" quip I will strangle the writer.

Project Runway Season 6, final collections.

So since the show has been shelved for like 85 years, the collections of the three finalists, whoever they are, have been around forever. When I have an opportunity, I'll be talking about them here.

Keep in mind that according to rumors/spoilers, the three finalists are once again all women, and two are blonde. I think Carol Hannah and Gordana are blonde, but I can't think of any other blonde women right now, though there may be. If three women are finalists, I wish both Irina and Shirin could be there, because they seem like the best designers right now, along with Christopher.

ETA: Well, here I go.

COLLECTION 1
Outfit 1: Ummm... it's okay. It definitely doesn't blow me away, which the first look is supposed to do. I appreciate the fact that it looks like a more fashionable version of casual clothes, but nothing here is flattering, and I suspect the giant knitted thing is hiding a really unflattering top and pants. It's got an edge, it's just... eh.
Outfit 2: Erm... yeah. it's just kind of there. It's a black dress that's not very flattering. It may have some interesting details at the neckline/bust, but I can't quite make them out, unfortunately. As a note for this collection as a whole, I do like the headbands. I think they tie the collection together to give them this youthful, sporty vibe, which the designer was pretty clearly trying for.
Outfit 3: This is okay. I'm not sure what the pants are made of, and I have the feeling that I need to see them in movement to see if they're flattering or not. At this point, I'm gonna say... not. This outfit is cute, but pedestrian.
Outfit 4: Not crazy about that shirt at all. Yeah, it's probably a pattern or something, but it looks like she spilled grease on it. Those pants are horribly unflattering, too. Like, if they're not flattering on this skinny-ass model, they're not going to be flattering on anyone else, so they were just a terrible idea overall.
Outfit 5: It's... cute. That's about all there is to say. Why does that model look bulgy? I'll blame it on the sash around the waist. And those are the wrong shoes.
Outfit 6: This is probably my favorite outfit in the whole collection, not that that's really saying much because this collection is kind of blah. I could never pull off this look, but it's very fashionable and I am always a sucker for long shirt type things over leggings. Not crazy about the cleavage, not 'cuz I'm a ~prude but because I don't see it working here very well.
Outfit 7: This model looks like Katarzyna from America's Next Top Model, but I'm like 95% sure it's not. Anyway, I don't like the top very much. Again, it looks like she spilled something on it and now it's covered in stains. The gloves are weird, too... but the pants, for what they are, are actually pretty well-made and a good look. They might be the best single piece there.
Outfit 8: I hate those kind of tops, but that one's nicely made, at least. I'm not sure how much the skirt goes, though. It's just a little too short and tight, though the top helps in not making her look, uh, whorish. I'm not crazy about those shoes.
Outfit 9: From what I can see of that dress, it looks really cheap, especially the way that hem rides up. The ribbon is just kind of silly. The jacket, for what it is, is nicely made, but there's something I don't like in the design, exactly.
Outfit 10: It's okay. The color contrast is nice, but I don't like all the pulling and once again, the lame and limp little bow isn't doing anything for me here.
Outfit 11: I fucking love Jaslene. Anyway, this dress is not working for me. It's got some interest with the draping or whatever, but it's just so nothing. Like I said, I normally like the styling of these models with the headbands, but this struck me as way too Flashdance somehow.
Outfit 12: This doesn't work for me, either. The fit is all wrong and the weird draping doesn't work and isn't flattering. Too bad, because I see the idea behind it and I like that.
Outfit 13: Eeek, no! I see how it's a closing look because it's definitely the most dramatic of these looks, but the fabric is all wrong, it's an unflattering dress, it's in a bad color, and those belts officially piss me off because they're just hanging there with no purpose.
OVERALL: I like how cohesive this collection is, the styling - which could have been weird - really works, and I love the whole fashionable sportswear idea, but there's really nothing to recommend this for the win. The best of these outfits are just a little above pedestrian, and there are some real clunkers in here as well. Most of the clothing is nicely made, minus that one pair of white leather pants or whatever and the cheap-looking dress.

Collections 2 & 3 to come later. They are better. :)

Project Runway: Paper Dresses or whatever.

It's been kind of a boring season to be honest. I'm still watching, but I'm watching because I love clothes and clothing design. It was kind of funny seeing Tim Gunn get pissed off during this week's episode, though. Anyway... as ever, refer to Lifetime's webpage.

Althea: I really like this. I think it's certainly simple, but it's got enough details to make it interesting. The textures are totally lovely. As a minus point, the fit is not the best; it looks too big on her. That said, it's freaking newspaper! I'm amazed some of these fit at all.

Carol Hannah: As Carol Hannah is wont to do, this is a lot of look. There's a lot of "she was robbed of the top group!" but I don't really think that. The cups are weird, the bottom has way too much unflattering frippery, and it's making her look super wide and bulgy across the midsection. I mean, it's kind of a masterpiece of construction, seeing how it's made out of newspaper, but I'm just not crazy about it.

Christopher: Many thought he was robbed of the win, and though I like this, it's very basic. That silhouette will always be great and effective, but it's effectively just a structured top with a skirt consisting of torn-up paper. That's it. But it's a nice entry, and I don't mind it being in the top.

Epperson: I really like this, actually. I think it's so cool, and the dress actually has attitude. Good choice of accessories, to boot. I'm pretty sure I dislike that mullet hem, though.

Gordana: Eh. It's very plain, and the few details made to add interest, like the neck, I don't like. It's not horrible - let's face it, it's a totally cute and wearable dress - I just don't like it.

Irina: This won. It's a gorgeous, gorgeous design, but I definitely have a couple of issues with it that would have prevented her from winning in my book... but IMO she's still owed a win from that Week 1 dress, so I'll let it slide. My primary problem is that it's just soooo costumey. All I can think is that it's very Cruella De Vil. Like, if Chris March put this down the runway, the judges would have gotten on him for it. That said, it's impeccably made, creative, and just a really nice look.

Johnny: I wasn't really following his whole drama, but the dress he produced isn't great. Like Gordana's, it's just a basic dress with a few details added for interest that actually make it kind of uglier. Like, the spike thing, and the weird hem... yeah. It's not horrible, but it doesn't work. And it doesn't look all that flattering.

Logan: I think it's cute, but not great. My favorite part of the dress is the various colors; they're really bold and they work great. I don't think it hits the most flattering part of her thigh or whatever, though, and the model kind of looks thick through the middle.

Louise: Oh, man. I forgot about this one because I think I blocked it out of my head. Anyway, she tried to be interesting, but this is just ugly. Don't like the collar treatment and WTF is up with the way that model is styled?

Nicholas: It's definitely got an edge, but part of it looks like it's falling apart, almost. I dunno, I'm not crazy about the "wings" or whatever. And the way the model's styled is just weird. Overall, it doesn't work for me.

Ra'mon: It's okay. The silhouette is nice but the colors don't work together, in my opinion. He's still a top contender. Yeesh, I am tired and don't have much to say about these...

Shirin: I like this. The silhouette is not original, but it's not original because it always works and is really fashionable. It's cool that she managed to do that with paper, too. This dress reminds me of some of the best of Kenley's stuff and a little of Leanne's too. The cups look like they don't fit, though.

RANKED (best to worst)
Althea
Irina
Shirin
Epperson
Christopher
Logan
Ra'mon
Gordana
Carol Hannah
Nicholas
Johnny
Louise

"I am so over this commercial Chad."

So... what is the point of this commercial? Seriously.

But at least I have "Gossip" to cheer me up :D

"Michael... am I gay?"

I may have said this before, but I'm feeling very optimistic about Ed Helms' screentime this year because of The Hangover.

Oh, blah.

babycakes just spoiled the fact that Lulu goes next episode on ANTM. This is one of those cycles like C7 where the women of color are just really lacking, as pretty as I think Ashley (well, the jury is still out on Ashley. Photo-wise, she's certainly decent so I'm waiting to see what she can do.), Bianca, and Sundai are. And Jennifer, if you're counting her here. Lulu is the least conventionally pretty of all of them, but she's got the best photos by far. I mean, I'm not upset by this, but there are many many other girls in the competition I'd rather have go home before Lulu.

Add that to the fact that I have a terrible stomachache and I totally jinxed Mo and it's not a great day. :(

l love la laura linney.

and yes, what you might think is an "I" at the beginning of that blog entry is in fact a lower case "L." Just to be fun.

And I love The Savages, no matter how depressing it might be.

Survivor S20: All-Stars 2, Heroes vs. Villains

How much punctuation is in the title there? It's like a freaking Lord of the Rings movie title. Anyway. Because I was just talking about Jeff Probst and it reminded me of that, here is the rumored cast for the next season of Survivor, which is, as said above, another All-Stars version, and my thoughts on them.

HEROES
Tom (Palau)
I really like Tom. Yeah, he dominated the game by physically dominating it, but he knew how to work strategy too at times, even if his guilt trip of Ian was bizarre. Plus, he's just really likable. He's a NYC fireman... of course he is.
Rupert (Pearl Islands/All-Stars)
Of course he's coming back. He's decidedly one of the best characters in Survivor history. I don't love him as much as America seemed to, but I don't hate him as much as, say, everyone on Television Without Pity.
J.T. (Tocantins)
I really liked J.T. but I thought he kind of got by on being a charming Southern gentleman. Still, props for him, because I so thought he would be kind of a dumb early out, and then he completely rocked the game. There's a lot of "ahmahhhgaaahhdd Stephen talked himself out of every jury vote!!!" but you've gotta be kidding me. He would have never won. Maybe he could have gotten one or two votes, if that.
James (China/Micronesia)
I hardly watched China, but he was the one who was incredibly stupid and got voted out with like three hidden immunity idols two seasons in a row or something, right? Yeah. If he's who I'm thinking of, he seems like a nice guy, but he just doesn't deserve a third chance when he fucked the first ones up so much.
Colby (Australia/All-Stars)
He's one of my favorite people from this show ever. I love him and yeah, it doesn't really have anything to do with strategy, just the fact that he's really hot and seems like such a genuinely nice guy. He's like JT before JT was JT, kinda. I really hope he's not an early out but he probably will be.
Stephenie (Palau/Guatemala)
Eh. Loved her in Palau, was eh with her in Guatemala. She can be really spunky and awesome, but at times she gets whiny and super self-centered.
Sugar (Gabon)
I am not sure. I ADORED her on the show, but after the show was over, it was really clear she was just doing it for publicity and whatnot, and she kind of ruined her season by not voting out Bob. That said, how can I hate her after "AND A LOS-AH!!!"? Spoilers say she's a really early out and I'm not surprised.
Amanda (China/Micronesia)
I really like Amanda. I think she's the definition of scrappy, constantly underrated, and responsible for some of the most awesome moves in Survivor history. That said, she always gets to the end, where she should be the obvious winner, and completely fucks herself over in her jury speech. I hope she doesn't do that here.
Cirie (Exile Island/Micronesia)
I love Cirie, too. She brings the sass, intelligence, and brilliant strategy. If they don't vote her out early, she'll probably own this season. I don't want to see her voted out at the last minute for a third fucking time, though.
Sandra (Pearl Islands)
OH HELL YES. I hope she wins this.

VILLAINS
Coach (Tocantins)
Well, it's to be expected. I just wish he wasn't coming back so soon; I got really tired of him during Tocantins, though he was funny at first. I hope All-Stars 2 doesn't turn into The Coach Show like his season did.
Tyson (Tocantins)
Really? Coach and Tyson, coming back so soon? Thanks, Survivor producers. Really. I totally mean that. Not sarcasm at all. Noooooooooo.
Randy (Gabon)
Stupid, bigoted asshole. I hope this happens again.
Boston Rob (Marquesas/All-Stars)
I know he's obnoxious and I wish he wasn't coming back because his wife just had a baby for God's sakes, but he is kind of hilarious and I'm glad he'll be there to balance out just out-and-out douchebags like Randy and Russell (at least Corinne isn't coming back to boot). Watching his reaction to Coach's bullshit will be amazing, too, I just know it. But... supposedly he's an early out. =/
Russell (Samoa)
Evil Russell, not cool Russell with the dreadlocks. Anyway, I think this guy might be the reason I'm not watching Samoa, I'll just read the recaps somewhere until he gets voted out... which I'm pretty sure won't be for a while. He just makes me sick to my stomach. I hate to be all I CAN DIAGNOSE PEOPLE BASED ON AN HOUR OF TELEVISION! but he genuinely may be a psychopath. Pouring out his tribe's water and burning their socks on the first night? Making up stories about Katrina? Supposedly later in the season, telling one of the girl's he's allied with that he's fallen in love with her in order to get her vote or something? What the fuck. I'm hardly a flag-waving feminist, but his gross misogyny bothers me a lot. And the guy's got a wife and four kids. Yikes. That said, if he tries that shit with the girls that are supposed to be on his tribe, or better, girls like Sandra, Amanda, or Cirie, they will tear his fuckin' throat out. So, that should be fun.
Candice (Cook Islands)
Who was she again? I hated Corinne and I'm glad she's not back, but I can't imagine this girl was more villainous than her. OH WAIT! She was the one that had that one kinda creepy guy on one of the other tribes fall in love with her totally randomly! And then he talked about it at Tribal Council and Jeff was like WHAT and it was HILARIOUS! But... I guess she wasn't all that interesting herself.
Parvati (Cook Islands/Micronesia)
I liked her, but she's a little too dull to be considered a villain.
Jerri (Australia/All-Stars)
It's funny. She was like THE MOST HATED SURVIVOR CONTESTANT OF ALL TIME back during Australia, but if you watch that season now, she's really not bad at all. She was conniving and bitchy and all up on Colby, but not worthy of HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HAAAAATE. And during All-Stars, she was genuinely kind of sweet and helpful. Whaaa? I'm interested to see what happens here.
Courtney (China)
I only half-watched China, but IIRC she was way more crazy than villainous. I'll never say no to the crazy on this show, though. Yaaay.
Danielle (Exile Island)
Huh? Who? I don't even remember her. The female "villains" aren't nearly as horrendous as their male counterparts, which is both good and bad, I guess.

I hope that Coach is an early out so we don't have to hear him for almost an entire season again and somehow it works out that Sandra, Colby, and Cirie all band together to vote out Russell and Randy not too late in the game. Yesssss.

Celebrity Jeopardy: Unexpectedly Hilarious.

Apparently, this season or whatever, they're going to bring "celebrities" on the show every Thursday, or one Thursday a month, or something like that. Last night, the three celebrities were Andy Richter, Dana Delaney, and Wolf Blitzer. Seeing how Wolf is, you know, on CNN and seems intelligent and whatnot, I thought he was going to kill it, but he did HILARIOUSLY bad. Like, hilariously. At one point he answered a question "Julia Childs" and at first they gave him credit, but then they took it away because it was supposed to be "Julia Child." I think he ended the show with something like -$4600, but they bumped him up to $1000 so he could participate in final Jeopardy. Ahahahaha. Oh, and Andy Richter destroyed all of them; he ended up with like $68000 or something.

Then again, I remember when Celebrity Jeopardy was on VH1 and it was hosted by Jeff Probst (!!!! pre-2000 obviously) and the lead singer from Sugar Ray owned everyone.

Matt Damon in The Informant!...

So uh, if he didn't have the weird little mustache, I'm pretty sure I would find him even more attractive all chunked up. Yessss.

"Gossip"

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

I will say it didn't feel much like a premiere, but it was a truly hilarious episode. I laughed pretty much the entire way through. I may rewatch and post thoughts here, but it was just so freaking funny. Parkour, Andy, the interns' final talking head, Andy, Andy, Andy, Michael being Michael, Creed wanting to scuba... and Andy. I've said it before and I'll say it again, give Ed Helms a Nobel Prize in comedy or something like that.

I almost forgot...

OFFICE THURSDAY!!!!!!!

:D :D :D :D :D

I forgot to mention, probably because I wanted to forget about it

Based on the preview for next week's Top Chef, everyone's favorite judge Toby Young is back next week. FML.

Oh noooo, Toby, look what you made me do! You made me tag this post with both "Top Chef" and "stuff I hate." Those two things shouldn't go together! Stupid Toby. :( :( :( :( :( Now I know how Michael Scott feels...

ANTM C13 E2.

First things first: SMIZE.
Secondly: SMIZE WITH CAMELTOE.

Uh... what? This episode was kind of zzz. I'm pretty glad Courtney went home, because she had no potential, but Rachel's elimination totally bummed me out. Even if I didn't like her as much as I did (she was probably my favorite girl, now it's probably Laura), her reaction was just so sad. :(

As for the photos...

1. Erin: She’s working the hell out of this photo. This may make no sense, but she both blends in and stands out. That aspect gives the photo a really editorial aspect. I love her pose; it’s really dynamic and interesting without being too posey or looking like she’s trying too hard. The face totally works, too. I’ve said it a million times… that makeover doesn’t suit her in person at all, but it’s amazing in photos, and she looks like a china doll here. She’s got a ton of makeup on and that combined with a strong expression made several other girls look pretty drag, but she looks decidedly feminine, if still forceful and, okay, FIERCE here. I really like it. I only wish, like in the case with almost all the girls that were standing on the ground and not on the horse itself, they photographed her whole body.
2. Lulu: I really like this photo. I think it’s adorable. I understand how people could think she looks blah or whatever, but I think it’s got a great casual vibe to it. That pose is just so cute. She looks like, “Who, me? Oh, you caught me!” I love that. And no, everyone, it doesn’t look like she’s grabbing at her vagina like I’ve seen said 500 times. God. Her hands are just kind of… hanging. They're pretty clearly not groping herself or whatever. Anyway, her face totally works with that whole cute vibe, too. I can’t remember if it was her or Sundai that the judges whined about the actual smiling, but I think the smile really works here. It’s almost like a coy Mona Lisa smile going on, and the nice light in her eyes only adds to that.
3. Nicole: The judges were right in that she made herself look gigantic here (height-wise, she’s obviously not pudgy in any way). I seriously love how tall she looks here. And she’s TOTALLY KILLING ME in the face, in a good way. I love that expression. She just put so much so much in her eyes and face in general. She’s not getting a higher call-out because there’s something weird about her pose, but it’s a great photo for her. She needs to work on her “DURRRR” expressions in person, but she’s an awesome model for sure. And haha, it looks like the jockey’s staring at her ass here.
4. Brittany: She really disappointed me last week, but this photo is pretty darn awesome. The pose strikes me as uncomfortable, but I can’t even imagine how the heck she did that pose on the horse, so I’ll give her a break here. The hands are very awkward, though, and that’s hard to ignore. They’re probably why she’s as low as she is on this list. She looks kind of old and drag in the face – I don’t think she can take a ton of makeup, especially with her makeover, to be honest – but the expression is actually great. It’s so strong. Again, it’s a real credit to her that she was able to do that on a freaking horse, and with that hat. Hopefully she puts out pictures more like this week, and less like last week, from here on out.
5. Laura: Love her. She needs to keep working it like this. I am not totally crazy about the pose because it’s kind of awkward, especially in that arm, which has some weird stiffness going on, but she gets points for really going for it, especially in such a weird position on that horse. I love her facial expression. It’s so strong. Frankly, it’s almost a little bit too strong, because she’s coming off a touch drag, but the makeup doesn’t help there. It’s a good face, though. She’s got stunning eyes. The first five photos this week were all pretty great, and to me, Laura, Erin, and Nicole are emerging as real frontrunners.
6. Rae: I loved her pose, to be honest. I thought it was one of the best poses of any of the girls. It’s really interesting and actually kind of sexy. She looks kind of short, and that leg in particular makes me pause, but I appreciate that she went for a more dynamic pose, which most of the girls just totally ignored. In the face, it’s just kind of weird. She definitely didn’t ~smile with her eyes~. Those eyes are just blank and it’s kind of weird. Oh, and the mouth kind of bothers me, too. I don’t think the eyes would as much if she didn’t have the weird beaver teeth. But seriously, Tyra, how is this in any way Madonna? No. Maybe the hat. Maybe. I think this photo works more as a whole than as a sum of its parts. Like, looking at it, I see quite a few flaws, but it really works overall.
7. Kara: Ummm… it’s fine. I really wish they’d photographed her entire body. It’d be better that way. As is, it’s fine, but pretty plain. I like how there’s an attitude to the photo and a sort of subtle and latent sexiness going on in her pose. Her face is fine, but she looks a little old. Good expression, though. It ties in with the subtle sexiness. There’s not a whole lot else to say here. It was kind of plain.
8. Courtney: Pretty sizable step down here. I know they got on her about her face, but I actually kind of like that here. She looks really, really pretty with such long hair, and more high fashion than she actually is. That said, with the squinty eyes and the “unf I’m Megan Fox” mouth, it almost seems a little too obviously sexual. The body pose is a little too unsure for me – her pose is like she’s readying herself on the horse and wasn’t quite ready for the shoot – and she looks not only short, but definitely chunky in the thighs. I feel bad for her, getting eliminated on what was essentially just a moment of weakness, but she didn’t really have any potential so I’m hardly crying.
9. Ashley: Half of me likes this photo, and half of me wants to LOL every time I look at it. I know the judges complained that this was just the test shot, but I kinda like it the same way I liked Tahnee’s Chanel photo from AusNTM C5. It’s got a sort of nice simplicity to it, and the eyes are surprisingly sharp for a test shot. That said, she is essentially just standing there like “DURRRRR I got braids over my boobs IDK what to do!” And something in her proportions looks very, very off, though I think photographing her entire body would have helped there. It’s not terrible, but she could have done better, and I would have liked to see some of the other photos, even if they were supposedly OMG OVERPOSED!
10. Sundai: This photo really isn’t so bad, but looking at them all a second time, I think she belonged under all of these girls. The main issue is probably a photography thing, since she looks so goddamn short here! I know she’s the shortest one, but damn, she just looks so tiny. Had they photographed her legs, it probably wouldn’t have been so bad, since her legs do look longer than a 5’3” girl’s. The pose is kind of… trying too hard and not particularly original. Her face is pretty, but overall, I don’t see “model” at all in this photo. She looks extremely pedestrian. And the fact that she looks like twelve years old weirds me out, too, because she’s, like, naked. Personality-wise, I love Sundai, but she’s gotta step it up.
11. Bianca: Her pose is okay. She looks very short, but it’s interesting, but she looks like she’s getting into position and wasn’t ready for the photo. I think that might have been improved with a better face, though, which is really where this photo fails. She just looks soooo unsure and unready, almost comically so. I mean, she still looks totally gorgeous, but the expression is just so “durrr? I’m not ready!” I do disagree with the very popular opinion that she looks drag in this photo, though, but the expression is just so damn bad. Oh, and Tyra, when will you learn that very dark black girl + ice/platinum blonde hair = terrible, terrible idea?
12. Jennifer: Jennifer, since I’ve pretty much accepted you’re the pre-select winner, STEP IT UP! Yeah, she’s all the way to the bottom of the list… again (though it’s better than last week, I think). First, the good. I like how tall she looks in this photo. That’s… about all there is to say on the positive side of things. The pose, I can see what she’s trying to do, but it’s just sooo awkward. She looks like she’s trying to stop herself from falling off the horse. There’s too much tension in her arms; she looks like she’s holding on for dear life. And that face is just AWFUL! Her expression is totally dead, her eyes are way too… hooded or something?, and you all know I hate beaver teeth. Seriously, her expression makes me want to laugh every time I look at this picture. This photo, like last week’s, is hardly one of the worst of all time, but I really hope she improves.

SO CUTE.

Awww... how sweet!

I like the Phillies pretty much as much as I can like a non-Yankees team, so yeah.

Thanks, VH1.

So I'm watching VH1's The Fabulous Life or whatever they call it, which might as well be called Rich People Are Rich, and I learned that one of Penelope Cruz's Oscar dresses - and not even the one with the crazy feather bottom - took 228 hours to make. Seriously, that's over a week. Is Penelope Cruz even worth that much of your time? No.

2 girls 0 eyebrows.

How much do I love this?

White people are mad!

I love that they're being called out on this bullshit. Like, seriously, let the Kanye thing go (though if you want to listen to Obama calling him a "jackass" 500 times, that's okay, because it's hilarious and awesome), and please, stop calling him the N-word. That's disgusting.

Ugh...

I dunno what cactus tastes like, but when Ashley made jelly doughnuts (I typed douchenuts there originally, which would have been something very interesting and different) with cactus, I literally gagged. It just sounded so, so gross.

Also, Jen's Quickfire dish sounded amazing - I really don't like sausage because it's often greasy and heavy, but I loooove chorizo - as did Bryan's elimination dish... plus, it was appropriate, not fucking ceviche for cowboys on a ranch in the desert, God. I'm glad he won that. He's really cute. As for Bryan's brother, he had a weird ego-crazy episode this week. Weird. Still love him!

Ron is truly funny, and in the way I appreciate, where he's not necessarily trying to be. The scene where he was breaking down the tree branches or whatever made me laugh so hard. He kind of seems like teh suck at cooking, but I so hope he doesn't go home soon!!!!

It was weird to see Laurine in the top for both events. I'd more or less written her off, but maybe not. With the edit Ashley was getting, I expected her to either win or leave... and... well... that didn't happen.

Eli seems hilarious; it's too bad that he's probably going to get a douchebag edit soon.

In which I admit something embarrassing.

That new Vince Vaughn/Jason Bateman movie Couples Retreat looks terrible. Like... WOW. BAD. That said, in the trailer, when they have the line "My name is Stanley, spelled with a C," I literally laugh out loud every time.

So, back me up here. That is a funny line, right? I'm not just laughing over stupid crap?

ANTM/Top Chef tonight

zzzzz
&
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

More later.

Oh wait, I AM MAD THAT RACHEL LEFT GRRRR!!!!

Hey, all closers in baseball other than Mo.

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU?!?!? Yeah, I know it can't be easy to end a very close game against extremely powerful teams, BUT IT'S YOUR FREAKING JOB!!!! Seriously, you're all being shown up by a 40-year-old with a huge bald spot who's thrown the same goddamn pitch since 1996.

I love Fabio.

He eats a lot.

He's still probably my favorite Top Chef contestant, though Jen and Kevin are catching up to him. Oh, and the brothers Voltaggio (seriously, how cool is that last name?), even if their personalities aren't huge or anything. Neither were Stephanie's or Harold's, after all, and they're close to Fabio for me.

Haha awesome

Inglorious Bobbleheads.

AIEEEE The Office IS BACK THIS WEEK!!!!!! I don't think I've freaked out about that enough!!!!

"He's a... jackass."

OMG OMG OMG OMG I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

I mean, I love Kanye, but speak truth, Barry!

Ew, Tom.

So I'm watching the marathon of Top Chef on Bravo right now and I never noticed that, in the episode where they cook for the military people (which still makes me TEAR UP, IDC), when the judges are talking about the chocolate and peanut butter bread pudding dessert, Tom Colicchio says, "It tastes like a Reese's peanut butter cup." Okay, what's the problem with that? His tone is so DERISIVE! How can you be derisive about Reese's peanut butter cups?!?!??!?!?

I STILL LOVE YOU TOM.

lol

this site. Just... this site.

Hahahahahah!

Somehow I missed that London from ANTM C12 - who was super super Christian and constantly talking about God, though not in an obnoxious way - is in Playboy showing off her bewbies and ass! That's pretty hilarious.

There are many things I like about Borat...

But here are two underappreciated things:

a. "Everybody's Talking." Seriously, whoever thought a movie like this would feature a Midnight Cowboy shout-out? Genius.
b. The fact that the nicest people to him - by far - are the ~scary gays, the black people who look like they're in a gang, and the crazy evangelicals. It's pretty awesome.

You know...

The Kanye West thing took precedence, but the 2009 VMAs were just a hot mess. There was that, Lady Gaga's amazingness, especially when Eminem greeted her on stage and looked genuinely frightened. There was that guy that couldn't do the Michael Jackson lean properly. There was that random woman who jumped up on stage with Jay-Z and Alicia Keys. Seriously, it was the hot mess-iest of hot messes. And that's awesome.

OMGGGGGG

The macros coming from this are pretty amazing. I've seen a whole bunch that were just hilarious, including one that was TOO SOON but I may edit this post later - like, weeks later - to add it. Because it was that amazing.

The Invention of Lying

This movie looks so freaking cute! I honestly hope I can see it as soon as it's out.

Ooooh, and now I gotta go cuz The Daily Show and The Colbert Report are back. And Jon Stewart is in a fat suit a la Michael Scott at the beginning of "Weight Loss," so this is gonna be a great episode for sure. :D

I feel like I already mentioned this, but yeahhh...

I read the script for Jennifer's Body. Like, a while ago. It's very easy to find. Anyway, I've heard all kinds of "OMG so many pop culture references! Damn U Diablo Cody!!!!" snark, and... that's not really true, to be honest. The script is only okay, though. Like, it just seems like it's a generic horror movie, and say what you will about Juno, but that movie was not generic. Oh, and the violent scenes seem very violent. I'm squeamish, so...

I don't think this movie would be getting the hype it's gotten if it wasn't called Jennifer's Body and the body in question wasn't Megan Fox's. She's gross, though, so... yeah.

I saw Adam

It was pretty good, but the movie actually needed to be longer because the characters seemed... inconsistent. That's not the right word. Like, I can see why they all did what they did, but they seemed to jump from one extreme of emotions to the next. It's a B or so. Also, I called Peter Gallagher being an asshole even though he seemed good at the beginning, because he's Peter Gallagher and that's what he does.

Also, it's TRULY ANNOYING to see that movie with someone who majored in psychology, because said person will go on and on and on and on about Asperger's and how she is the only person who knows anything about it. GOD.

Oh, boo.

Apparently I'm the only one that feels that way about the Kanye/Taylor Swift thing because everyone is like "ZOMG TEAM TAYLOR!!111!!" Okay, it was hella rude. But it's still Taylor Swift!

Hahahahahah

So I was literally just coming on this to be like "Is there anyone less talented or deserving of awards than Taylor Swift?" in honor of her winning a Video Music Award... and then Kanye West rushed the stage to yell about how Beyonce had one of the best videos of all time. Tacky. But WORK, Kanye!

Hah.

So I was watching Terminator 2 earlier on Bravo just to kill time because they were gonna show the most recent Top Chef episode, which I looooved, after that, and somehow the movie juxtaposed with Bravo's GIANT POP-UP ADS on the side of the TV for Flipping Out and The Real Housewives of Wherever was pretty awesome.

ANTM C13 E1: my call-out order.

Now with reviews of photos and whatnot!

1. Nicole: She’s a PAIN IN THE ASS, but wow, this photo is freaking stunning. It’s just a totally fashion photo, and it manages to be really awesome while having a simplicity to it that assures it’s not too crazy a photo. I even disagree with the judges that she should have gone for more in the face. It’s not weirdly blank, but I love how totally serene she looks in comparison to the energy in her body and hair. Oh, and I’m a sucker for crazy flying hair or whatever. Work it, Nicole. And maybe get that stick out of your ass and bring a normal backpack to school.
2. Erin: There’s a lot of “THIS PHOTO IS BORING!” but I love it. It’s not “STRAIGHT OUTTA VOGUE!!!!” as everyone else would say, but it is a lovely and fashionable photo that I could see being used as an ad for perfume or something. She’s pretty pedestrian in person and her makeover doesn’t suit her there, but she can turn it out in photos. I love her jawline here, and she’s really got something interesting going on in her eyes. Like… you want to keep looking at the photo. To me, it’s very much not boring, and it’s all because of what Erin is doing in the photo. Good job.
3. Rae: She got first call-out and I can’t really argue with that, to be honest. This is a totally gorgeous photo. It’s got such a beautiful softness to it and I love how dreamy it is. Plus, major, major, major, major props for dealing with those shoes, damn. I was really impressed at how easily she rolled with that, especially because she seems like she’d be so easily shaken. The only reason this photo isn’t higher for me is that the face is quite a bit too spacey for my liking. She looks a bit like she’s got a head cold. But it adds to the dreaminess of the photo, and it’s a credit to her that she managed to stand out despite being photographed as so… white, like Bianca’s.
4. Laura: It’s pretty simple and the facial expression is indeed bordering on a head cold, but it’s a beautiful photo. I love the gentle sensuality of this photo and how incredibly soft she looks here. I think she did a great job updating her baby photo and making it fashionable. And yeah… that’s about all I have to say about this, I guess. It’s really good, it’s just too plain to be better than the other photos. I just wish the photographer had taken more of a full-body photo.
5. Courtney: There’s a significant drop-off from the first four, but this photo is still pretty good. It’s definitely both beautiful and dramatic. I love the expression on her face, and she’s modeling the clothing extremely well. It’s kind of a generic fashion photo… but it’s definitely a fashion photo. I love the androgyny in it, especially because she’s such an elfin girl. The arm, like the judges said, is too muscular, but that could have easily been photoshopped out. I think I hate the way she’s styled here, but that’s not her fault. I don’t know how flattering the pose is in her reflection; the dress may have saved her for the main photo, but hey, she knew how to work it.
6. Lulu: Originally, I ranked this way lower, then I realized I was crazy. It’s a good photo with an eh face. What I love about this photo is how super long and lean she looks here. Her pose is far from creative, but then again, it’s only the first week. She definitely has time to improve, and at least she’s showing off the clothing extremely well. I’m not crazy about the face at all, though. She just looks kind of blank and blah there.
7. Ashley: This photo was overpraised, but it’s still good. She did update her baby photo to give it a more fashionable edge, and I don’t think anyone can argue that this photo isn’t outrageously hot. She did a good job of looking long and lean (yet still really curvy); if you didn’t tell me she was shorter than 5’7”, I wouldn’t have guessed it. That said, in close-up, I really don’t like the face much at all. It’s a better angle on her face than, say, the girl I would rank last here, but it’s still too up-the-nose to really be a great photo. And that hand looks glued to her head or whatever and is definitely kind of weird. Good start, though.
8. Rachel: First things first, I didn’t agree with the judges that said she looked 5’9” here. Does she look 5’5”? No, but it’s pretty clear she’s shorter. What bugs me more is the fact that her proportions look very off here. She looks like she’s got a crazy long torso and itty bitty legs, which is never good for a model. The judges were right about her hands, though. They’re weird. And anyway, on to the good stuff, because I did like this photo. She’s showing off the clothing really well, and I think her pose is totally adorable, along with her face. It’s not necessarily high fashion, but I think she did update her shot and make it at least fashionable, if a little plain.
9. Kara: First things first, I didn’t agree with the judges that said she looked 5’9” here. Does she look 5’5”? No, but it’s pretty clear she’s shorter. What bugs me more is the fact that her proportions look very off here. She looks like she’s got a crazy long torso and itty bitty legs, which is never good for a model. The judges were right about her hands, though. They’re weird. And anyway, on to the good stuff, because I did like this photo. She’s showing off the clothing really well, and I think her pose is totally adorable, along with her face. It’s not necessarily high fashion, but I think she did update her shot and make it at least fashionable, if a little too plain.
10. Bianca: I think a good amount of the crappiness of this photo might be the way it was shot and the fact that she’s in all white against a very light background, shot with a lot of light, but it’s just… eh. She doesn’t stand out as much as she could. I like her pose, what I can see of it. It’s edgy and I like the fashionable aspect. Of course, people are whining about how much she OMG stole it off of Marjorie or whatever. That said, it’s just not a very good photo. Her face, which is what stands out with the terrible way this was photographed, is weak, lifeless, and unconvincing. But I see potential.
11. Lisa: Without that freaking ball or whatever in the way, this would be a much better picture. That ball is definitely her fault, though, so I’m not gonna blame the photographer for it. Anyway, it’s not a great photo, but she should have stayed because she is SO FREAKING GORGEOUS WOW. Anyway, I actually kinda like the look on her face. Though the anger is quite a bit too exaggerated, it does make the photo interesting. Her body looks like it would be great, but again… the ball.
12. Sundai: It’s kind of an awkward photo. At least she looks like Fatima in the face… it’s good to have that going for her. The expression isn't good, though. Worse, she looks really stumpy here. The way she’s holding her legs just isn’t very good at all. I see her trying to make this photo editorial by doing that thing with her legs for sure, but it just makes her look very awkward. And… yeah, that’s about it. Awkward, blah in the face, and she looks really short. Oh, and not that it’s her fault, but that underwear is so not flattering at all.
13. Brittany: Ugh, she was a pretty major disappointment. She’s showing off the clothes pretty well, and she really looks like a porcelain doll in the face, but that’s all I can say in the “good” column about it. Her eyes look totally wonky, her expression is bizarre and drugged-looking (the open mouth combined with the expressionless eyes just isn’t good), and her thigh looks really chunky. It’s not a graceful photo/pose at all. And above all – and maybe worst of all – this photo is simply hella boring despite its many flaws. One of the photos where she looked supposedly hoochier would have at least been interesting.
14. Jennifer: This picture really wasn’t that bad. None of the photos were. That said, it’s the worst of the week (hence why it’s ranked last, obviously). She does look long and lean, but the pose is just so… bland and generic. She has a great jawline like the judges mentioned, but they forgot to mention that her face looks really, really awful here. It’s not a good angle on her eyes at all and I’m pretty sure you can see right up her nose. I think she was trying for a sensuality vibe here, but it just looks like she has a head cold, not unlike Allison’s beach photo from last cycle. I do think she's the winner. It seems really obvious, but so did McKey's and Teyona's wins. I'm not expecting surprises in ANTM.

oh, self

I love how I said I was OMG SO EXHAUSTED then cranked out like 5 more blog posts.

ANTM makeover thoughts!

Go here for before/after photos.

Ashley: Upgrade. Even though that style can be slightly aging at times, it actually makes her look younger and fresher. Cute photo. ZOMG her thighs are touching!!1411!!!

Bianca: Neither. She really got nothing changed. She looked beautiful before and she still looks beautiful. I dunno why she was bitching about it. That photo is so WHAT I WILL CUT YOU; it makes me laugh.

Brittany: Minor downgrade. I think she looked cuter and fresher before, though it does bring out her bone structure and she pulls it off soooo much better than Clark. I think both of those girls should have gotten a chestnut brown as opposed to going straight to black or whatever, though. Her legs look really weird in this photo.

Courtney: Upgrade. She has no edge, but this gave her the tiniest sliver of one. Haha @ that being the same pose. She looks kind of like a man in the makeover photo :(

Erin: Upgrade. In person, I don't know, her makeover makes her look kind of weird, but it reminds me of when they did kind of the same thing to Allison; for a few episodes, it was almost shocking, but then I got used to it. And at least this one won't turn into a HORRIBLE WEAVE OF DOOM AND RATTINESS. Anyway, why this is an upgrade is because it gives her an edge in shoots. Without it, she's kind of pedestrian-looking. I like the picture, minus the fact that she looks short and that missing arm is just weird.

Jennifer: Upgrade? It looks healthier, but they didn't really do anything to it. Good photo.

Kara: Upgrade. Her hair was a freaking mess before. I like the picture, but she's definitely gonna be the girl who gets kicked off because she can't take a head-on photo.

Laura: Eh... minor upgrade? They just brightened her up a bit. Not a very good picture, she looks like a drag queen, but I still love her.

Lisa: Neither. Did they even do something? GOOD LORD SHE IS SO PRETTY.

Lulu: Downgrade. It just calls attention to her bad mouth. I like the picture and her attitude in it.

Nicole: Any time you make red hair REDDER AND BIGGER AND FLUFFIER, it is SO an UPGRADE! Though, it will probably go away once she washes her hair, booooo. Awesome picture, because Nicole is fierce and awesome.

Rachel: Major upgrade. She kind of looked like a mess before, and normally going almost black with the hair makes girls look weird, but Rachel looks totally beautiful now. Great photo. Work, Analeigh Rachel! Too bad you're going in the double elimination next week, it's been confirmed by screenshots. =/

Rae: The hair's an upgrade, the lack of eyebrows is a downgrade. She is really beautiful. She still looks chunky in photos, which bothers me, but again, GORGEOUS.

Sundai: Hot shoes. Downgrade. I thought this would be a MAJOR upgrade based on her promo photo, but in person, Sundai's hair made her look gorgeous. She's still a gorgeous girl, but she probably looked better before. I do not like this photo because she is making a point of showing off her armpits, boo. But she does look taller than 5'3" or whatever she is (I know she's the shortest, and she's either 5'3" or 5'4"), and because it bears repeating, hot shoes.

In praise of Padma./random musings

I gushed about Tom Colicchio a few posts ago (also, it was hilarious on that stupid Bravo show when he talked about how he purposefully said "pack your knives and leave" instead of "pack your knives and go" because he didn't want to step on Padma's toes) so I guess I should talk about Padma now. Anyway, I like her. She may be the most beautiful human being on the planet, and she brings a powerful aura of spaceyness to balance out the snark sauce Tom brings, not that I mind that.

But what do I really like? That Toby, who was supposed to be a full-time judge this season, hasn't shown up yet, at all. Or maybe he's there and all of his lame references that no one gets have just been edited out. Bravo, you don't have to change this, trust me.

Did this entry make sense? No. It did not. I am tired.